Thank god I’m not the only one. Let’s start a facebook group.
The OP is right. The sexual confessions were a total non-sequitur in that thread. Why bring it up in a question about peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?
The OP is right, and brings an appropriate level of outrage to the topic. It’s not the end of the world and doesn’t merit insane levels of anger, and (s)he doesn’t give them. Check-plus. Good pitting.
I was thinking about this while I was stirring my oatmeal with my manhood. There’s really no explaining it; people are just weird sometimes.
In between bouts of wild sex, I read this thread, and I had two questions about that statement:
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This is a child-rearing guide, so how does any advice about what to think of during masturbation enter into it? Are you supposed to tell your kids to think about Jesus while they are masturbating?
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What is the purpose of thinking about Jesus or a bible verse while masturbating? To make you lose desire? (Like, good Christians aren’t supposed to masturbate.)
I think I’ll go have some wild sex now, but I’ll stop back later and see if my questions are answered.
CairoCarol, I had to take a break from the thread to watch some hot oatmeal porn, but I’m also confused by that. Even worse than telling your kids to think about Jesus while masturbating is telling your kids what to think about while masturbating.
And now I’ve got that creepy Type O Negative song Christian Woman stuck in my head. Damnit.
The book’s stance is that masturbation is not exactly good but, with adolescent boys, pretty much unavoidable. Suggesting he think about the bible was meant to prevent the young boy’s mind from wandering into naughty thoughts territory.
I never said it was a good book on child-rearing.
And, Jeff, we should get together sometime.
Thank you for the clarification.
And I know what you’re thinking: my wild sex didn’t take me very long, did it?
That’s okay, CairoCarol, it doesn’t always have to be a marathon. Sometimes just a handjob and a bowl of oatmeal is all that’s needed.
FWIW, usually when I’m getting a blowjob and posting to the Dope, I don’t mention it in my post.
Really? I’ve mentioned it every time.
So when you get excited, you’ll have a real hard on to get to church!
I’m gonna go flog the bishop now.
PS - dopers posting during sex. That’s not a picture thread I think I want to see…
Dammit. This isn’t the first time I’ve been prepared to post a response, only to find that you pretty much went ahead and posted it for me. Except I wasn’t really thinking about the post-sex snack aspect of things (I’m thin, but I eat like a pig after sex), and was just going to say that she must be pretty fucking ugly to be a woman bragging about having sex to the Internet.
That’s like starting a thread to say that you successfully operated a motor vehicle today. Woman getting laid ain’t much of an achievement.
I thought a “sandwich spread” was when I spread my legs when I’m the meat in a two girl sex sandwich.
I was screwing my girl friends, Jessica Alba and Jessica Biel, yeah that’s right, in their asses, when all the sudden I got this idea for firm sponge bread buns with Tootsie Rolls and mayonaise, which is my favorite sandwich!
When I was accepting my Nobel prize for peace, my nose itched. But when I was accepting my Nobel prize for literature, it didn’t. Go figure.
George: So, we were there doing the grape jelly.
Jerry : The Grape jelly!?..No?
Kramer: Oooo…you better watch out with that. You know what they say.
George: No?..What do they say?
Kramer: Yea, the grape jelly always leads to peanut butter
Jerry : Peanut butter!?
Kramer: Ahhh yyyesss…!"
Elaine: No no no, grape jelly doesn’t “always” lead to peanut butter.
I dont get to peanut butter until…well you know
Jerry: No, I don’t know…
George: Oh common, it was only grape jelly, there was No peanut butter involved
Kramer: Well thats what she said…are you sure, maybe she did the ol’
peanut butter switcherooo when you werent looking
George: Now that you mention it, I did turn away to open the window
Kramer: See! thats when it happens, they tease you with the grape jelly
and then they…ssssslllipp it in! when your not looking
Jerry: So, you got the peanut butter…undercover
George: Dammit
Elaine: Wow! I never thought of doing that.
Jamicat…You’re good. Didn’t you write for the Seinfeld show?
Well I was screwing my girlfriend Jessica Rabbit and I got the idea of some spotted dick between two barm cakes…or summink
Because we are too busy sticking our penises in oatmeal.