…with my favorite friend, Chippy the Friendly Neighborhood Sea Anemone, when Chippy squaked (an anemonish squak, if you will), “Hey, Teppei, with your demi-god status, you must run into lots of problems dealing with mortal flora and fauna!”
“How do you mean?” questered I.
“Well, for one thing, I know that trees nudge out of your way so that their dirty bodies won’t soil your ethreal presence. What happens when you walk in a rain forest? Wouldn’t the trees get all cluttered?”
“Chippy,” I patiently replied, “you wacky anemone, don’t you know that trees can also uproot themselves? The trees on the edge jump out of the ground to make room for the trees in the middle!”
Chippy smacked his head, for indeed it was a foolish question.
When Chippy whacks his head, as he often does, he does so with his head tilted, and therefore noticed the birds floating above my head. Another thought occured to him: “Teppei, with all these beautiful birds flying above you to announce your presence to the world constantly, what happens when they need to poop?”
I laughed heartily. When I was done, I answered, “Why, Chippy, dont’ you know that the only birds that fly above me are the one’s that excrete flowers? That’s why there are no flower throwers in front of me throwing petals for me to walk on. It’s rather convienient!”
That goofy Chippy, he slapped his forehead twice for that silly pondering.
An hour and 47 smacks later, Chippy finally asked “Teppei, I know that a new lesbian super model that’s well endowed with a name like Kushy Bimbolino (I got that name from Outland, btw) declares herself straight at the site of you once a day. Now, the world supply of lesbian well endowed super models with names like Kushy Bimbolino can’t be that big. What are you gonna do then?”
“Chippy, you…ah…I mean to say is…”
I was lost. The thought had never occured to me. So, I did the only thing I could do: I threw Chippy into an oncoming truck.
I then ran to my house and hid (well, as best I could hide with birds hovering eveywhere). I couldn’t think of an answer to that question. So, I decided to go online and have everyone else do the thinking for me. Any takers?
