Hmm.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but the general thrust seems to be that you’re tired of the pasta he prepares and you’re hoping he’ll branch into making some other types of meals he’d be prepared to eat?
If I’m right, then what you’re asking for are some ideas of good, healthy food that’s
a) simple enough for him to cook,
b) easy enough to add meat as a side dish, and
c) that he would like to eat.
Is this more or less the question?
The one thing I recommend is not viewing it as some sort of Mighty Issue that will Tear You Apart If You Let It. People tend to get really dramatic about food issues, but the fact is, it’s not that big a deal. It’s not like you’re going to have to be making two completely different ten-course banquets each night. I live in a mixed veg/non-veg household, and it helps that my family likes vegetarian food, but even so, everything works out eprfectly fine and yummy; so don’t sweat it too much. 
Thanks for the feedback, and good to know that I’m not the only one in this situation.
Ok, so questions people asked:
I’m definately vege for animal rights reasons, but I don’t necessarily feel he should change his ways based on my beliefs. I do think he could eat a little better (adding more vegetables and fibre into a mostly pasta, croissant, cheese and proscuitto diet!) But I have discussed this with him - both about how he really feels about me being vege (it’s fine as long as he’s not expected to completely give up meat, although he’s willing to eat a little less) and as part of a separate conversation about eating a little better - he seems to be OK with this aspect as he carefully checked fibre content of his bread at the supermarket the other day and agreed to try a more multigrain version.
When I cook it’s variations on Asian - Thai, Japanese, Indian etc or Mediterranean, but he’s pretty rooted to traditional Italian, and as a Northern Italian this invariably involves meat, in particular veal (couldn’t be worse…). He is noticably trying to work around my new ways, and when he does cook is trying to invent interesting ways with pasta, but I think is going the ‘remove meat and serve’ route, as opposed to taking a fresh look. I do appreciate this from him (in particular because he comes from a culture where food is affection), but after some hints around other ways to do things.
We have tried pizza which works well, will try the calzone idea, and I’m keen on the idea of the burgers as well. I don’t live in the US however, which means tracking down vege meat options is pretty hard, there is just not the range available.
We’ve got frozen fish fillets in the fridge for when he just needs to have a steak - like last night when I just prepared a baked potato and veges, and we each sorted out our protein option. I am not keen on completely cooking 2 different meals, so ideas around how we can do this and keep it interesting (and easy at the end of a long day) would be good.
Thanks for the suggestion about B12, will look into this as I currently take no supplements.
Yep, pretty much it!
There are pasta options that don’t involve meat, fish, or tomatoes. Get some fresh basil and try making some pesto, if you’ve got a food processor. Or just buy pesto from the supermarket.
Risotto can be made vegetarian, if you use a vegetarian stock. I’ve had pretty good luck finding vegetarian powdered beef-flavored or chicken-flavored stock in the kosher section of supermarkets.
Polenta can be vegetarian as well. I loves me some polenta with tomato-mushroom sauce…
I’ve got a cookbook called The Complete Italian Vegetarian Cookbook that I like. It’s got lots of ideas for vegetarian Italian dishes. Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone also has a number of Italian-inspired recipes.
Having read your additional information, let me add one more comment: get used to eating more pasta (with tomato sauce) than you might prefer. I think the idea of helping him learn to cook a broader range of dishes is great, but especially if you don’t want meat, pasta with a tomato sauce is very likely to be much more of a staple/comfort food in his ideal diet than it is in yours.
I’m not seeing this issue so much as a vegetarian/not vegetarian issue so much as a “the food people grow up with sets our expectations for adulthood” issue. I know of several people who have had to adjust to their spouses eating habits after marriage. I know of husbands who prefer a meat, a potato, and a vegetable at every meal. I know of a couple where she’d serve rice at every meal, and he grew up eating rice maybe once a month–with Chinese food (she’s not Chinese, she has met him halfway–she fixes a lot more potatos or pasta side dishes now than she did when they got married). As Manda Jo suggests, part of blending your lives and eating meals together is making adjustments to accommodate each other’s preferences and predjudices.
So if I were you I’d try to fix something new and different but really easy every week or two in hopes that someday he says “I loved that dish, lets have it again soon” and you say “It’s really easy, I can show you how to fix it so we can have it on one of your nights”, and generally encourage him to find new variations on pasta so you don’t feel like you always eat the same things on his nights. But I would also recognize that eating pasta with a tomato sauce is a staple in his diet and while it may not be your first choice, it isn’t the end of the world to eat it a couple times a week.
Vegetarian does not equal vegan. Eat eggs and cheese and you won’t have much to worry about here; most pre-processed vegetarian dinners or restaurant meals seem to incorporate a lot of cheese anyway.
True. Maybe not* quite *as easy, but it certainly can be done.
fluiddruid- true, but a supplement might be a good idea anyway.
I think this is partly right - I definately cook food from a range of cultures, while he’s pretty happy with just one. It was much less of a problem of course when I was eating meat, but I think there’s something to that. Over time I’m sure we’ll settle on what ‘our’ recipes are, but this vege business just complicates things a little.
On the upside, we just had lunch together and I was flipping through the vege section of an Italian cookbook I have, and he started looking over my shoulder. We both liked the look of stuffed peppers, and when I pointed out he was cooking tonight, he suggested he pick up some on the way home. So handling the additional suggestion gently seemed to work well there. I should remember, softly softly catchee monkey…
I thought that to be a full vegetarian I would need to avoid food including animal byproducts including rennet and gelatin? I’ve seen very little vegetarian cheese around.
Kosher cheese does not contain rennet and should not be too hard to find.
I’m a vegetarian, and my wife isn’t. We have no problems.
Admittedly, it’s made a little easier because she is, for the most part, perfectly happy not eating meat as long as the meal itself is tasty and nutritious. She quite frequently orders vegetarian dishes when we eat out, and it’s certainly not to appease me because i don’t care what she orders.
I cook more often than she does, and i always cook vegetarian meals. And when she cooks for the two of us, she cooks vege as well. There are times when we each fend for ourselves, especially if we’re on different eating schedules that day due to work or something.
She periodically buys herself some fish or some chicken, and occasionally she has some nice beef. When she does this, she usually cooks it for herself, because she knows how she likes them done, and has some tried and tested favorite recipes. On those occasions, we’ll usually cook up some vegetables, and she’ll have her meat while i have tofu or some other meat substitute.
It helps that, apart from the meat thing, we both like lots of the same things and are both very open to a wide range of food types and new dishes. It also helps that she likes tofu and other vegetarian products.
While i very rarely actually cook my wife’s meat, it’s mainly because she has her way of doing it. It has nothing to do with squeamishness or some other anti-meat feelings. In fact, we’re having a BBQ on July 4, and i’ll be standing over the Weber turning the big juicy burgers and hot dogs that our meat-eating friends love.