Why, I’m a Libra, too! Who will this mystery person be? Who cares? As long as I get my fame, fortune, and orgasms out of it, I’ll be sat-is-fied.
Woo hoo!
My horoscope from a couple of weeks ago:
Gemini (May 21-June 21):
Cool people don’t need drugs to have fun. Cool people need to take drugs to have fun.
Well, I certainly can’t argue with the Onion.
M.
My horoscope for this month said :
“HAAAAAAAHAHAHA! Just put the book down and go to bed. For a month. Don’t even try. Loser.”
Sigh.
Is it Thursday already?
SCORPIO (Oct 23-Nov 21)
Week of June 21, 2001
Please ensure that at least three of the following prophecies come to pass, Scorpio. Doing so will put you in alignment with highly benevolent cosmic trends. 1) You will have a successful negotiation with a green-eyed, yellow- bellied monster. 2) A natural fool will provide you with a half- useful message about how to cultivate more freedom. 3) You’ll experience a metaphysical version of an enema, purging undigested emotions that had long been stuck. 4) You’ll carve the shape of a heart out of a slab of Spam and put it on the doorstep of a person who drives you crazy. 5) You will make love up in a tree, in the water, or in midair while skydiving.
FreeWillAstrology is the only one I read besides The Onion. I’ll come to your party if invited though.
Sweet! I’ll bring the … party favors.
Great! Does he have a wonderful sister I could date?
I hate it even more when you’re not actually reading the star signs, you’re reading the column on the opposite page. Not only do they disturb you midway into the story, but then you have to read their stupid sign to them before you can go back to your article. Pfff.
I’m a Virgo, btw. Some folks say they can tell.