So... My friends want to get me some play.

In My Humble Opinion
1

Got a couple of friends. One is married and has a second kid due in June. The other one broke up with his g/f last week. For some reason, they think I’m really :cool:.

I’ve been spectacularly unsuccessful romantically. I feel like Jeff on Coupling, only not as successful. I’ve pretty much given up. These guys seem determined to get me some play. How should I feel about this?

On the one hand, I’m a guy! Guys like casual sex. On the other hand, I’d rather have a relationship. (See a previous thread about ‘fucking’ vs. ‘having sex’ vs. ‘making love’.) But I’m getting a bit old for a relationship. But I’m really a lot younger than I am. But I’m out of practice. But what better way to practice? Aiyiyi.

So I rode by the shop yesterday, and one of my friends had a ‘friend’. She’s 20 and has a kid. Basically, she doesn’t think anyone will want to date her because of her single mom status, and just wants to get laid. My friend gladly helped her out after I left. :wink: She has roommates.

We’re going clubbing in Vancouver tomorrow. They went last week, and said it’s a target-rich environment. Sounds like fun. But it also sounds a little sleazy. (Aside: My friends said that the women there complained that Canadian men are all jerks. :dubious: )

I’d always thought that I’d bump into someone casually, we’d start talking, then we’d flirt, then there would be some sort of sudden epiphany where we would realise we’re soulmates. Yeah, I’m an incurable romantic. (But I’ll deny it. I’ll even deny I’ve just typed it.) I’ve never seen myself ‘on the prowl’. Still, it looks like we’re in for nasty weather, and if a port is available I should probably dock.

I’ve got videography gigs coming up, I need to look for a ‘real job’, I have to settle my mom’s estate, I need to work on the house (i.e., get rid of my stuff), I’m waiting for two vintage sports cars to arrive/be finished, I need to make my short film, I need to break down the script for my short film before we start shooting it, blahblahblah. Now I’ve got a couple of blokes who want to hook me up.

They say beggars can’t be choosers. (Or, if Eleusis reads this thread, ‘Chiggers can’t be boozers.’ :wink: ) But I think what’s going to happen is that I’ll go to the clubs and just play it cool. I’d rather have a relationship than a one-night stand. Maybe I’ll meet someone who’s looking for the same thing…

2

You’re a smart guy who deserves a nice girl. Clubbing’s fine – if you want to get laid, nothing more. You’d be settling, though, and you’re better than that. Seriously. I really do think that about you.

Why not start hanging out where good women hang out?

Libraries? Church? Civic organizations? Bookstores?

Ya gotta get yourself a wingwoman!
PS: I’m curious about the married friend. Why’s he going out clubbing when he’s got a wife, a child and one on the way? Is it specifically to go and be moral support for you?

3

[drawing in the sand with my toe] Aw, shucks! :o

[ul][li]Libraries? Short Attention Span Theatre, here. I enjoy reading, but I usually have a few things going on at once.[/li][li]Church? I’m a devout pagan. ;)[/li][li]Civic organizations? The only one I’m interested in is the Civil Air Patrol. (I used to be a 2nd Lt.) I need to get ‘back in the saddle’ aviation-wise before I rejoin.[/ul][/li]

Defintely!

Yeah, I’m curious about that too. He likes having fun, and his wife lets him do it. (FWIW, I think he’s basically my other friend’s wingman.)

4

I’ve found that the best way to meet people is to available to them. Meeting someone simply boils to down to pure chance. The more you’re out and about, the higher the likelyhood of randomly bumping into someone who may be that soulmate. It’s viral too, because you go to a friend’s house and they have a couple of roomies. Then one night you go out for food with your friend, the roomie, and a friend the roomie dragged along. Also keep in mind that bars and clubs are the worst places to meet people. Go to Starbucks, go the the library, go for a run in the park. You’re a great guy, get out a little more and you’ll have to beat the girls away with a stick.

5

Great people go to clubs. Great people meet great people in clubs. Big ships ram icebergs in the North Atlantic. But usually the big ships make the crossing without hitting ice bergs, and usually great people sucessfully elude other great people in clubs. But you know all that. Clubs are cool, and a good place to have fun, maybe even meet someone suitable for one of your numerous needs. Just remember to shop the whole mall with regard to addressing this part of your life.

Here’s your future as I see it:

Johnny wakes up with a start at 4:00 am just a few hours after returning from a Vancouver establishment sporting live Blues/Zydeco performed exceptionally well. A good time was had by all, but Johnny just can’t sleep. It’s a cold late May morning and Johnny decides to take advantage of a forecast calling for cloud breaks and minimal chance of rain for the next day or so. He hies himself with the crab pot & salmon gear & inflatable boat down to Birch Bay. By 5:00 the boat is ready to go and he’s just about to shove off but…DAMN! No 9-lives! Away to the Safeway! Up to the counter by 5:25 with 3 cans of savory stew, a pound of butter, a bottle of Chateau St.Michelle chablis and, what the hell, a 6-pack of Henry’s just in case his taste for salmon changes to a less active quest for sea bass or cod.
“Interesting breakfast.” says the checkout girl
“Not for me, for the fish! I’m going to feed the crabs this morning, and myself this evening.”
“I’ve never been crabbing, do they prefer butter or cat food?”
There’s nobody else in the line yet so Johnny loses himself in a brief detail involving 9-lives, crab pots, 2-3 hours in a boat, high probability of tempura-battered cod & jojos in his near future, and his looking forward to crabs & butter over wine in front of a fire tonight while he finishes up some work.
Well!" says Carmen as she takes Johnny’s $20, “what kind of work can you get done during wine & dinner at home?”
“Oh…just need to hammer out some dialogue for a film…nothing earth shattering.”
“OH! It’s 5:30 time for me to get out of here.” Carmen shuts down her till but keeps Johnny engaged with talk of steelhead fishing with her dad on the Stillaguamish when she was little kid.
As they exit the store, by way of goodbye Johnny drops, “Well, if you ever want to go fishing just let me know. I’m in here all the time.”
“Got any extra room today?”
“Um…yeah.”

6

Sttelhead fishing on the Stillaguamish, and his daughter’s name is Carmen? I know that guy. He taught me how to tie a soft-hackle stonefly nymph.

She really could have been a great cellist if she’d stuck with it. Find out if she’s still studying to be an architect.

7

Don’t do it Johnny L.A.! That Carmen the Checkout Girl is a little slut.

8

You say that like it’s a bad thing!

9

I used to believe this, until I met my current SO of two years in a club. Luckily, she was drunk (I was stone cold sober, for a change, as I was driving home that night) :slight_smile:

So nuts to you two :stuck_out_tongue: !

10

Actually, on re-reading, I guess I owe you an apology, Inigo (not that I was serious anyway :slight_smile: ). Looks like I just hit the iceberg that night!

11

[QUOTE=Johnny L.A.]
[li]Church? I’m a devout pagan.[/li][/QUOTE]

Well, then Vancouver island might be just the place for you. Lots of pagans there from what I hear. One of my old floor-mates told me Victoria is only one of two places in the world where the global five-pointed start touches land. Whatever that means.

Get yourself a bag of magik crystals and you’re in!

12

You should do what the rest of us do – online personals. We haven’t had a good “critique my ad” thread recently.

13

Oh, my head! :mad:

Not really. But I wonder how my friends will be feeling today? :stuck_out_tongue:

We headed up to Vancouver yesterday and found a place to park. We found a Thai restaurant (I don’t remember exactly where), and had a great dinner of pad thai, beef satay, hot and sour seafood soup, and something that was very like a Thai version of fajitas (without the tortillas). After that, we walked down to The Blarney Stone. We stood in line to get in, and the bouncer told Jerry not to do that again. Next time, we are to go directly up to him and he’d let us right in. (He remembered the guys from last week.)

Jerry and I started with a ‘purple death’. Or ‘purple-something’. It’s a shot of Sambuco with a straw. The game was to drink the Sambuco with the straw, and at the same time the bartender would pour in a shot of José Cuervo. Tasted good. The music was loud, and the place slowly filled up. Jerry proposed a ‘dare game’ to get the evening started. Basically, you give someone a ‘challenge’, and they have to do it. Paul went first. There was a girl wearing a tiara, so we challenged him to wear the tiara. He did. Turned out she was French, and it was her birthday. My challenge was to touch the belly button ring of our waitress (who was surprisingly game, being much more outgoing that a lot of waitresses I’ve seen). I don’t remember what Jerry did. Actually, the game only went one round because I couldn’t think of any challenges that wouldn’t be improper. I mean, I know the game is to meet people; but I’m no good at chatting up.

After my Guinness, I followed Jerry’s lead and just had the bartender give me whatever. More fun, not knowing what you’re drinking! So we hung out. By the end of the evening I had danced by myself to the music the band was playing (covers of Pogues tunes, other Irish music, Van Morrison, etc.), Jerry had gotten the phone numbers of every waitress in the pub, and hooked up with a young German nanny he’d met last week (and whom we drove back to White Rock at the end of the evening), and Paul was happily (and wackily) drunk.

Jerry met a girl outside, and talked to her for a bit. I came up and said, ‘Is this guy bothering you?’ and pretended to punch him in the gut and Jerry pretended to shove me around. Got a laugh. Jerry told her about my short film, and she was interested. He told her that the corpse of the woman has to be nude in one scene, and she said she would totally do it. :eek: Jerry excused himself, and she and I chatted about my film and other films we liked. (We both really like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.) I got her phone number, and I gave her the phone number to the studio along with my name and Jerry’s. Her friends wanted to go see The Killers, but she stayed talking with us (Paul had come up by then) until they dragged her away.

I closed out the bar tab, and the four of us (the German girl was with us now) headed back to the car park. Jerry wanted some pizza, and Paul was famished. (Ar? :confused: We’d had a huge dinner only six hours before!) We ended up at a McDonalds on Granville (I think) where the guys had some McCrap and the girl had some ice cream. Turned the wrong way on Howe, then backtracked to the Jeep. We got Inge home safely, I took the guys to their homes in Bellingham, and I came back home and hit the rack ot 0500. Slept for over five hours.

It’s sunny and very warm today. I went to the corner gas station and had a sausage biscuit and coffee. And I’ve made a pot of coffee. Maybe I’ll sit in the hot tub later.