They won’t resist much when you toss them post-haste, I think…
Funny, among people as rational as the Dopers I’d’ve expected to see a lot more putative eating of humble pie. 
I’m not clear on this whole rapture thing, but when, exactly, are the zombies supposed to show up?
Get to Boulder as fast as I can.
28 days later.
I’m no Biblical Scholar, nor do I play one on TV, but I thought that the second part of the rapture was that the rest of us were going to be cast into a Lake of Fire to fry for eternity. Assuming that, my answer to the OP would be…
The backstroke.
Many seem to assume we’d know the difference if the rapture occurred. My guess is so few people would disappear that it would at best be discounted as a random statistical aberration in the missing persons data.
Eh, I got all four horses boxed for a perfecta. I’m good. 
At least I won’t have to tolerate any more “Marriage = [man icon] + [woman icon]” signs on my neighbors’ lawns.
You mean used car dealerships will be abandoned? :dubious:
I have a hard time imagining that car salemen are the one to be saved. If they are, I think I’d rather stick around with the zombies.
Try to score with depressed Left Behinders who’re going “the hell with it” and giving in to their repressed desires.
So then it’s already happened?
Corner my local market in guns, ammo, cigars, cigerettes petrol and beer sales.
You heathens need supplies and I intend to help you out.
Oh, and I think I will build a large battle dome for a new Reality TV show I would host.
A Day At Auntie Entity’s!
Two men enter. One man leaves.
IF the pre-Trib Rapture scenario is true, the only fictional work I’ve read which is truly horrible enough to describe the post-Rapture world is Brian Caldwell’s WE ALL FALL DOWN. It’s basically Pulp Apocalypse- the only person who could film it & do it justice is Quentin Tarantino.
Malacandra- the rationality of some secularist Dopers kinda goes into default mode when considering “what if you are faced with undeniable evidence of God/Jesus/The Bible” scenarios, considering the amount of “If the Biblical God is real, then when I face Him, I’ll spit in His face” comments I’ve seen.
Really, they’ll be wetting themselves & sobbing like skinny btchs with skinned knees.
Btw, what will I do after the Rapture?
Probably be in rapt hee hee adoration of the Holy Trinity for a while,
then watch the fireworks on Earth below while praying for any loved ones
still left there.
I’ll go across the street to the house where the neighborhood zealot soaps up her giant front window with messages of christapaloozic browbeating, stand in front of her as she sits forlornly in her front lawn with her palms and tear-streaked face turned to the sky, and say, “I guess that whole ‘not praying ostentatiously in public’ thing wasn’t optional.” And then I will laugh, and laugh, and laugh.
And then, y’know, burn in a lake of fire, and all that.
Ha! There’s a lot of assumption that the people who “think” they are going to go to heaven actually are. I think most of them, all those TV evangelists and fundamentalists off all stripes, are probably way, way off. Everyone who thinks they are Right, and everyone else is wrong, all the haters and oppressors in the world. The people who want to make the world a smaller and less free world, they are going to be tossed into the celestial fondue pot.
The only people getting into heaven are the atheists, simply because they are being “good” and not expecting a reward for it. No garden of eden, no 72 virgins, none of that.
Not that I actually believe in the rapture anyway. :rolleyes:
Christian that I am, I LOVE this idea. It begs for a story written for it.
Well, I’m gonna’ discount the whole fiery lake thing, ‘cuz there’s really no God or heaven or Rapture. But I kinda’ like the idea of a Major Supernatural Event eliminating all those self-righteous pricks who think atheism is the root of all evil. So, I’d probably run for Congress, because nobody who’s “left behind” would care that I worked in a porn shop back when I was in college, or that I haven’t been in a church (except for a few funerals and a wedding or two) in the past 10 years.
That is assuming, of course, that only the pricks are taken, and not us assholes.
Aaaaaand, let’s just walk quietly away from the whole body part metaphor.
Have a barbeque.