A Visit From the Parking Thief
'Twas six days before Christmas, and all through the lot
Ev’ry driver was searching for just the right spot.
I wandered through row after row with great care,
In hopes that that magic slot soon would be there.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a bedraggled shopper, car in reverse gear.
My heart caught in my throat as I turned on my blinker,
I had this guy’s parking spot–hook, line and sinker.
I waited with patience as he backed out so slowly,
First spot by the entrance, it seemed almost holy.
He turned from the row with a grin and a wink,
He was handsome enough, his smile made me turn pink.
So distracted was I by that so charming smirk,
My prime spot was taken by some big fat jerk.
I honked mightily, furious with his gall,
He ignored me quite well, and walked into the mall.
I hope he heard me exclaim, ere he walked out of sight,
“Merry *$%@# Christmas, you bastard, and I hope your dangly parts rot and fall off!”
I feel slightly better now. mutter grumble swear