The ‘child’ is 8 (or was, at the time this mess started). It’s not an infant or toddler who requires focused care; it’s a third-grader who can probably get home, do homework, and entertain themselves until an adult gets home. Barring that, throw $5/day at a neighborhood teen or college student to babysit for an hour. Far cry from $20K/year.
Anyone willing to work for five bucks an hour probably isn’t someone I’d want to leave in charge of a small child.
The cost did include transportation to and from school and decent snack since so many parents picked up their kids right around 6.
Are you aware it is the year 2015?
Hey, if they can’t find anyone willing to babysit for precisely [del]half[/del] the amount they babysat for thirty years ago, it’s proof the world is going to Hell and it gives them new grist for their gripe mill. It’s perfect.
Thanks for the update, Saint Cad.
But…*did *fake-SIL actually give up custody, or did she just talk about it?
I get the impression that she has left the now 10-year-old in your and mrs Cad’s unofficial care, while she is now in a trailer three states over, with her dad and husband, willing her grandma to hurry up and die and leave her a house already ?
Those three sound like a family of Ron’s, by the way.
I am quite aware that it’s 2015. I’m also quite aware that teens and college students routinely post on the FB page for my subdivision for their after-school babysitting (which is a ridiculous word for an 8yo) services that range from $5-$10/day depending on age, how long they have to be responsible for the kid, and whether homework help is included. And that doesn’t include the SAHMs who actually volunteer their services, of which there are legion. We are in a huge subdivision in the middle of one of the most affluent counties in VA, and there’s still no need to pay $20K a year on a third grader’s after school care.
Incidentally, I never babysat, so dial down your rhetoric.
She can’t give custody to us. She gave custody to the dad within a day of learning she could live rent free in another state. I will lay money down that even when Grandma dies it will be left to Mrs. Polly’s House for Wayward Cats before the SIL gets it.
Broomstick Bingo!!
I got “Spouse” “Poor” “Busted humps” and “Disability.” If I get “Cans” and “Big box store” I get my diagonal line.
This is a warning for you. Many times it’s been said here to take all Broomstick stuff to the Pit if you have a problem with that poster. Don’t attack other people in topics not about it or outside of the Pit.
Actually “rhetoric” is a better description of your initial comment, unless you can show me such an ad for a “college kid” who is willing to babysit for a day for 5 dollars? Then I’ll rescind my comment, gladly.
Or you could just be reasonable and admit you understated how much babysitting costs in 2015.
I realized I need to update this thread.
The SIL’s husband and her are peas in a pod. He has lost multiple jobs by telling his bosses how stupid they are. Part of the issue is he doesn’t see how telling a boss flat out how stupid they are is a bad thing because he is so damned right. Not surprisingly he is currently out of work and when I found a job that would be perfect for him, he refused to even apply since it only pays $13 per hour.
So let’s get to the latest incidence
The SIL inherited over $50K. I suggested she use it as a down-payment on a house. Mrs. Cad she hire an attorney to get custody of her daughter back*. What happened to the money? Her husband who thinks he can repair cars (note: he is really bad at it) so he would buy cars and flip them. Sound like a great home business right? (Did you see where I said he’s bad at repairing cars?) So he would buy a car off craigslist and the owner would be honest and the conversation would go something like this:
<Owner> It needs a new head gasket.
<Hubby> Naw it just needs a tune up.
<O> No it definitely is a head gasket.
<H> No you’re wrong.** It just needs a tune up.
<O> I know it’s a head gasket because [insert knowledge here]
<H> No it’s not a head gasket. I’ll buy it for $15,000.
Husband buys it and does a tune up … then some more repairs … then has the head gasket repaired then sells it for $12,000 (not profit. the selling price is $12,000)
Lather, rinse repeat.
Her money is gone. When he was working he wanted to flip another car and she said they couldn’t afford it. (I witnessed this conversation personally) He said, “You knew I liked to buy cars when you met me.” to which she replied, “We have to pay bills and buy food with that money.”
Now he’s out of work and won’t find a new one and told my SIL that she has to fill out applications for him [after working all day and doing housework because as he sits at home all day he refuses to do any chores saying, “That’s her job.”] because he doesn’t understand how to fill out applications online. Last week they came over for dinner and we heard the story of because of this they can’t pay rent, he told the landlord he’ll have to work with them on that. And he has to lower their rent. And all the things the landlord is doing wrong and illegally and how the hubby know how it should be done.** (Because Dunning-Krugers are always law experts. And no, the landlord is not doing anything illegal). At this point in the conversation I ask if they are on a moth to month or a lease.
The lease is due to be renewed June 1st
I told Mrs. Cad after they left that that lease will not be renewed.
Mrs. Cad called me Captain Obvious.
Just heard yesterday that the SIL was told by the landlord that the apartment must be vacated by May 31st.
They are shocked by this.
No one else is.
*She gave up custody of her daughter to move to another state with her dad to live for free with her grandmother. Thing is no one asked grandma so when they showed up unannounced on her doorstep, grandma told then you ain’t living here.
** Same thing he does to his bosses and ends up getting fired for so you know this will turn out well.
Classic trainwreck family. I’ve known a few. Common characteristics:
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Refusal to accept responsibility. Nothing is their fault. Victim of everyone and everything.
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Toxic, self-centered personalities.
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Lazy beyond belief.
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Do not understand the concept of sacrifice & investment. “Live for the now.”
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Always trying to figure out how to use people and institutions for their own benefit.
There is no “fixing” these people. My strategy is to stay as far away (from these types) as possible.
What amazes me about that kind of person is that they always seem to manage somehow. I see that back in 2012, you were worried if you booted her out, SIL would be living on the street, yet despite her terrible living skills and her marriage to the passive-aggressive deadbeat, she’s not on the streets. By May 31st, they’ll have another place to live and will be a PITA to the new landlord.
What became of the daughter? I know she went to live with the dad, but have you heard anything about how she’s doing? She must be about 16 now. Does she have any contact with the mother at all? And why does the SIL want her back? For the child support?
The daughter is doing great (as I predicted way back when). She has a stable homelife with dad and stepmom and is going to a great private school. Back when her mother offered up custody she put in that she wouldn’t pay child support and he jumped all over that offer so he could get custody of his daughter so SIL gets visitation and pays no support. Her husband played the role of the wonderful stepdad and fooled everyone but since they don’t have custody he couldn’t give two farts for his step-daughter.
Of course as a teenage girl she needs her mom but they skype once a week. Like I’ve been saying for (over) 10 damn years it really is the best solution for her.
As for the SIL’s current situation, the plan is for her not to pay rent for the next two months and use that money to rent out a basement. I have the fear that they will end up in our laundry room that seems to be the emergency family homeless shelter.
Yes, there is a story about my stepson needing an emergency family homeless shelter.
Yikes. I hope the SIL doesn’t end up on your premises. Once she’s there, it’ll be hard to get her out, won’t it? Surely she’s got other venues for her sideshow. At least your stepson is an actual relative.
And please tell the story about him needing an emergency family homeless shelter.
You forgot: Always has a Big Plan for Making Money that is sure to work unlike the previous 200 plans.
Hey, you and Crafter_Man are totally describing Homer Simpson.
Well the closest person I know like that is my own daughter. The other kids turned out pretty normal in the personality department, but there’s something wrong with that girl. She’s not stupid, she’s just… weird. Every time we talk I just cringe. She acts helpless and is very passive aggressive. She still lives at home at 21, and I hesitate to pressure her to leave because I’m sure not she’d make it out there. I don’t think any roomate would put up with her for long periods of time.