Is that the one that has the beginning that sounds almost exactly like Lust For Life by Iggy Pop? I’ve been wondering how that song isn’t considered outright plagiarism.
Excuse me.
I’m going to take this in a slightly different direction. The song that I would like to obliterate from the face of the earth is not pop. It is not rock or country. It is not rap. I cannot think of any famous bands that made their reputations playing this song, which is almost a hundred years old. But if I have to hear another song, or another version of this kind of celebratory claptrap, I’m going to go insane.
Please, please, can we stop singing stinkin’ Happy Birthday yet?
It’s the most insipid, mind-bogglingly stupid song, that only offers everyone the opportunity to sing in the key of Embarassed while the recipient says, “Oh, no, nobody sing, please, just give me the cake for Pete’s sake, don’t sing!” It is always performed by a group of people who can’t decide on the first note, who can’t figure out that it’s a waltz, and there’s always some mushmouth with agar for brains and the musical pitch-sense of an anaesthetized gazelle that has been wrapped in chickenwire and dumped in the river who adds the “and many mooooooooooooooooore” at the end. And that’s only if he manages to avoid singing the timelessly funny “you look like a monkey” substitute lyrics. Big laffs!
Trust me. Nobody could be as tired of “Sweet Home Alabama” after thirty years as the entire world is tired of “Happy Freakin’ Birthday.”
Let us not be hasty!
I’ll grant you that the songs you list have been overplayed, along with (of course) “Freebird” and “Sweet Home Alabama.”
The thing is, there are some really nice Skynyrd songs that hardly ever get airplay: “Ballad of Curtis Loew,” “All I Can Do Is Write About It,” and “Simple Man.”
So let’s retire the overplayed numbers, and give the lesser-heard songs a shot.
You are so right about this. Of course, I used to have my own personal second verse that went like this:
And many more,
and many more,
until you drop dead,
on the floor.
Actually the clearchannel stations in the Wheeling/Pittsburgh area where I live have some sort of fetish about the "Ballad of Curtis Loew" and play it so often that I would have to put it on the top of my list of songs that I could live the rest of my life without hearing. Of corse anymore I seldom get past the opening riff before changing the channel or sliping in a CD.Chalk up another vote for “Happy Birthday.” If I didn’t already hate it, the singing waiters in resturants would drive me to it.
Other nominees:
“Tiny Dancer” and “Benny and the Jets” by Elton John. Somehow the local classic rock station seems to think that Sir Elton wrote no other songs in his career.
“Baby I Love Your Way,” any version
The entire Steely Dan catalog.
Actually spoke-, I was considering mentioning “Ballad of Curtis Loew” in my earlier post, but was unsure of the proper title (thought it was just called “Curtis Lowe” to tell the truth). It doesn’t get played as much locally as it used to, but our classic rock station used to bombard us with it before Clear Channel bought the station. I guess they cut back on it to make room for more Bob Seger. So I’d include it, “That Smell”, “Saturday Night Special”, lately “Workin for MCA”, and the other usual suspects on the mercy killing playlist.
Other non-Skynyrd additions:
“Limelight” and “Spirit of the Radio” - Rush. When radio playlists were larger, it was nice to know that if a DJ announced Rush was coming up there was a chance it would be something other than these two.
“Tears in Heaven” - Clapton. Mawkishly bad and people act as if you are heartless and cruel if you don’t like it. The point of no return for Slowhand’s descent into the depths of suck IMO, although he had been creeping toward it for years.
“Chuck E’s in Love” - Rickie Lee Jones. Not played that much anymore seems like, but when a singer’s biggest commercial hit even pisses off many of her diehard loyal fans because it turns people off to a diverse talent, that song must go.
“Closing Time” - Semisonic. To modern rock stations around the world: JUST STOP IT NOW! The song wore out its welcome in the summer of 1998.
Yes, ugh. You also know a song is very bad, in fact awful, when you hate it when people don’t sing it—such as when a movie won’t pay for the rights—so they sing instead some kind of “Jolly Bornday Wishes” or that stupid-ass clapping rhythm the waiters do because none of them have the singing talent of a grilled oyster. Even though they’re not singing “Happy Birthday,” they make me hate the song more. The song is no longer a celebration, it’s a way to humiliate the birthday celebrator before a chorus of drunken office workers who can’t even remember the name of the person they’re singing about. And then when you’re singing for two people at once, that awful moment when nobody realizes how to sing, “happy birthday to Colin and Elizabeth” because a third of the people are singing “Elizabeth and Colin” and the other third gave up and sang “Hmmm-mmmm and Hmmm-hmmm.”
pant pant
Someone please shoot that song.
Ugh! “Believe” I hate that song! I had a psychotic freakazoid neighbor that played that song full blast on repeat at 3:00 am. I finally called the cops when she refused to shut it off and they had to break down her door, toss her on the bed and handcuff her to turn off the effin’ cd player. (…and that was not the only night I had to call the police, oh no, there were at least 5 more special occasions.)
Then there was the night she was playing that hideous Laura Branigan song (not like they’re not all hideous…) “Gloria”
Gloria, Gloria
I think they got your number
Gloria
ad nauseum.
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHH!
Thank bejebus I finally managed to get that nutjob evicted!
It’ll be too soon if I ever hear either one of those songs again.
“Memories” (from “Cats”). It just simply never needs to be heard again.
I nominate “Lady Marmalade”, especially the Hip Hop/Pop/whatever crap that came from Moulin Rouge. It’s really sad that “voulez vous coucher avec moi” is the only French phrase most Americans know.
I’ve got to agree with you all on the Skynard.
The Doors must drop off the face of the earth. So over played that I do not want to even listen to the unplayed stuff because I get the sneeking suspicion it ain’t no better.
Come on Eileen. Dixies midnight is coming…RUN!
Do you really want to hurt me? GAWD YES!
And as much as I love My Fleetwood Mac, Please obliterate “Don’t Stop”? The vision of the Clinton thing will not stop.
I love it! No Freebird, No Stairway. I’m hanging that in my living room.
I think we’re doing a fine job here (for the most part). Let’s print this out when we’re finished and start mailing it to radio stations!
I want to nominate “Hold On Loosely”. It fits into the format of nearly all my radio presets and some days it seems as if they’re all playing it at once. It’s on the eighties station, it’s on the classic rock station, it’s on the “adult contemporary” station, it’s on the other classic rock station…AAIIEE!
Audio books. Get more audio books.
“They Call me Mellow Yellow”
“Crimson and Clover”
“I Love Rock and Roll”
“I Will Survive”
“Margaritaville”
“Bohemian Rhapsody”
“Paradise by the Dashboard Lights”
“Candle in the Wind”
“Fancy”
“House of the Rising Sun”
“Banana Boat Song”
“American Pie”
“Cheeseburger in Paradise”
“Why Don’t We Get Drunk and Screw”
“I’m so Lonesome I Could Cry”
“I’m Too Sexy”
“My Way”
“What a Wonderful World”
The main reason I hate these and other songs, some of which I once enjoyed, is that for a time I worked with a karaoke hostess. I’ve heard too many drunks caterwaul and slur their way through these pieces to ever hear them again w/o wanting to ram chopsticks through my eardrums.
Wow Scumpup excellent list.
The House of the Rising sodding Sun DIE! DIE! DIE!
That’s the one.
It might be close to 20 years ago, but I remember Howard Stern “analyzing” this song and it was his funniest bit ever.
“Robin, I cannot talk to you right now. I am busy listening to this Bobby Goldsboro song!”
“Oh, Howard, Honey didn’t just grow the tree, Honey loved it!”
I wonder if it’s possible for them to replay that bit. It was after they left NBC.
“I Feel Good by James Brown” - The death knell of this song was when it was used for a laxative commercial. I can’t hear it now without thinking about pooping.
Just about any song that is used in a commercial. I have almost cried when I hear a song I once liked being used on a commercial. I want to cry when I hear a song I hate used on a commercial since you know you will hear it over and over and it will get stuck in your head.
I also do not listen to radio much anymore because it seems like all they ever do is play the same couple songs every hour. There is nothing like overplaying a song to make you hate it.
Speaking of overplayed, I will add “The Freshman” by Verve Pipe (of The Verve or some such thing). I can tolerate almost any bad song (except the Oompa Loompa song) but this one makes me want to stick knitting needles in my ears to make it stop. This song got me to stop listening to the radio once because I had a couple close calls in the car when trying to switch the station when that damn thing came on- AT LEAST ONCE EVERY FREAKING HOUR. I eventually thought it was safe to listen to the radio again after several months and for some insane stupid reason they rereleased the song or something and it was all over the place again. I think the song was about suicide but I can’t help but wonder how many suicides it caused.
Crimony, how could I forget the worst one of all…
“I’ve Got Friends in Low Places”
I heard so many drunks bellowing this one, that even typing the title makes me want to stop my ears with molten lead.
Hey Bruce Daddy (and the Roast Beef No-No Spot), you forgot the original “First Cut,” by the esteemed Yusuf Islam, nee Cat Stevens. That’s the best one.