Soybean futures increased while grain futures finished mixed Thursday on the Chicago Board of Trade.
Wheat for March delivery fell 4 1/4 cents to $2.94 3/4 a bushel; March corn rose 1 cent to $1.97 3/4 a bushel; March oats fell 1/2 cent to $1.70 a bushel; March soybeans rose 5 1/2 cents to $5.23 1/4 a bushel.
Pork futures retreated on the Chicago Mercantile Exchange. Beef futures were mixed.
February live cattle rose .17 cent to 89.52 cents a pound; March feeder cattle fell .10 cent to $1.0082 a pound; February lean hogs fell 1.42 cent to 74.35 cents a pound; February pork bellies fell .20 cent to 93.72 cents a pound.
What I wanted to point out was the startling headline (and that I, for one, welcome our new soybean overlords). And to point out the other startling occurances from above article, ignored, no doubt, in the excitement of the inauguration:
Live cattle rose!
Lean hogs fell!
Pork bellies fell!
Hundreds injured! (Except for the live cattle, who were safely out of the way)
Ah, I miss the commodities reports! Just reading the OP gives me a comfortable, homey feeling.
“Chicago Mercantile Exchange” has always been almost a mystical incantation to me. When I was a kid, before I had the foggiest notion of what a “mercantile” was, and had only a faint grasp on “Chicago” and “Exchange” it sounded like something very, very important, especially since it was invoked on the hour by almost every radio station.
Not enough farmers around here for the tv or radio stations to bother, I guess. I tune over to the AM station to hear it now and then, though.
Er, well, cough, carry on then with your, ah, very amusing thread, then. cough And, ah, don’t mind this puddle of nostaligia I’m wallowing in; I’ll find a mop and take care of it on my way out. shuffles off awkwardly
Thanks for your second post, Eve. For a moment there I thought the tribulations of the city had finally pushed you too far and we were seeing the first post from a new, more bucolic, you. I was anxiously awaiting the press release:
(TO ALL OUTLETS//20 Jan. 2005) Eve Golden, respected journalist and show-business historian, announced today that she is dropping her much-anticipated biography of Vernon and Irene Castle. “Those prancing sissies represent all that is wrong with the modern concept of elegance and glamour,” said Ms. Golden, chewing what appeared to be a piece of straw. “The citified, electric-lit, martini-fuelled decadence that corrupted generations.”
Speaking from the unpainted front porch of her new pied-a-terre in the unspoiled Ozarks, with the delicate strains of a jug, banjo and musical saw trio playing in the background, Ms. Golden lit her pipe with a wooden match struck off her boot, offered the gathered reporters a swig from her mason jar of clear liquid, and proceeded to describe her new project. “What’s been missing amidst all the glorification of show-business couples is a tribute to the traditional, I might say red-state values that have made this country great. That’s why I have turned my attention to the real, though unacknowledged, first couple of American film: Percy Kilbride and Marjorie Main. Their influence on Hawaiian vacations and birth control politics alone justifies volumes.” Ms. Golden then spat a gob of something brown at the feet of those assembled to indicate the interview was over.(FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE)
Eve, you don’t know the half of it. Strictly for you, I am designing a joke that shoehorns Marjorie Main, Helen Hokinson, Friz Lang and the three Soong sisters into one devastating punchline. That no one but you and I will nderstand. I estimate that the straight line for this joke will occur within 75 years.
Recalling the “choice” thread where we dueted on this back in 1999:
Green acres is the place for Eve
View a hog farm, and you’ll never leave
Land spreading out,
so far and wide
Kiss Manhattan,
Then come to the countryside!
Ma (formerly Pa) Golden Goes to Hooterville
(Eve Golden, Percy Kilbride, Hank Patterson, Barbara Pepper, and Arnold Ziffel)
Hilarity ensues when Ma Golden moves from Manhattan to Hooterville to write for the Hooterville Intelligencer. While reviewing a a production of “The Outhouse” (a local variation on Ibsen’s “The Dollshouse”), Ma Golden (Eve Golden) discovers that all is not what it seems in the bucolic hamlet. Watch for the special musical number, “I Made A Fool of Myself Over Fred Drucker.”
That’s Sam Drucker. Fred Ziffel was…err… umm… Arnold’s father. Besides I picture Ma Golden ensconced in the lobby of The Shady Rest Hotel sipping tea and eyeing that cute young crop duster Steve Elliot and plotting to steal him away from that red headed hussy of a wife of his named Betty Jo.
The fact that I know all these characters’ names is a big shameful embarrassment.
When the price of pork bellies skyrockets, people begin to suspect a connection between the sudden disappearance of Arnold and Ma Golden’s new opera gloves.
TKofS, you think you’re obscure? I made a move reference that nobody caught.
