I’ve been doin’ this job for 17 years, honey. Doctors come and go, but nurses make this place run. We don’t get much credit or pay. We see a lot of misery, a lot of dyin’, but we come back every day. I’ve given up bein’ appreciated, but I sure as hell won’t let any of us be taken for granted.
Who told you I interviewed a nurse yesterday?
- I’m scared to death. It’s my first job interview in 20 years. -
- [chuckles] You’re going to be fine. You just have to be your… [stops talking]
- Myself
Welcome to “The Daily Planet Today.” I’m Lois Lane, and with me for his first on-camera interview is Superman.
Quick! To the Batmobile!
Gee, Dad, I’m too old to have you drive me. Like, everyone would think I’m some kind of a square, or something.
Today, I’m the getaway driver.
Watch out Eddie, we’re gonna burn rubber.
We got a burn notice on you.
Grab a napkin, Homey. You just got served.
All right. Let’s see if you’re as good in person as you are on paper. Make me a salad.
You don’t win friends with salad.
Claire, do yourself a favor and join me in a wedge salad.
The man puts his ketchup on his salad.
Ketchup? Catsup? Ketchup? Catsup? … huh, I’m in way over my head.
“When the pie cools, the starch goes through a process called retrogradation where the molecules restructure into a crystalline form. The flavour compounds are trapped in said structure, which makes every bite more flavourful.”
“Yeah, I definitely tasted the extra molecules. Quite delicious.”
[after dumping out a dessert that wasn’t baked ] Oh, sh… urely that isn’t how a Strawberry Swirl is supposed to look.
Well, I grew up with an older brother and a very contentious twin sister and I believe I could easily best you in any physical confrontation, be it noogies, swirlies or the classic ‘why are you hitting yourself?’
No way, Bart. If I lean over, I leave myself open to wedgies, wet willies, or even the dreaded rear admiral.
With all due respect, Admiral, those stars on your shoulders don’t carry much weight in this building.