Don’t call me chicken.
Don’t call me Shirley.
You two are just dumber than a bag of hammers!
I can handle things! I’m SMART! Not like everybody says… like dumb… I’m smart and I want respect!
Well, we’ll go out to Miller’s Crossing. And we’ll see who’s smart.
Mitch, there’s something you need to know. Compared to you, most people have the IQ of a carrot.
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There’s nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Nobody ever won a war by dying for his country. You win a war by letting the other poor dumb bastard die for* his* country!
No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die.
I musht be dreaming!
Dreams feel real while we’re in them. It’s only when we wake up that we realize something was actually strange.
Sorry, Quaid. Your whole life is just a dream.
There is no spoon.
You threw a spoon at the guy, Jeff!
Yeah, what was up with that?
I, I, I am embarrassed about that. I thought it was a fork.
Enjoy mirth-filled moments with the amusing antics of space drones 4-Q-2 and Artie Deco!
You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny *how *? I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you ? I make you laugh, I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you ? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny ?!
Son, you got a panty on your head.
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If you wanna know something and he won’t tell you, cut off one of his fingers. The little one. Then tell him his thumb’s next. After that he’ll tell you if he wears ladies underwear.
I’m hungry. Let’s get a taco.
Shelly, I’m going to ask you ten times. You understand? Ten times.
From Bound with Jennifer Tilly. Speaker of the line is holding garden shears, and Shelley’s fingers.