Gentlemen, from this moment, any soldier without leggings, without a helmet, without a tie, any man with unshined shoes or a soiled uniform… is going to be skinned.
Did you order the code red?
All right, give me Hamm on five, hold the Mayo.
I’m gonna keep the coke and the fries but I’m gonna send this burger back, and if you put any mayonnaise on it, I’m gonna come over to your house, I’ll chop your legs off, set fire to your house, and watch as you drag your bloody stumps out the door.
I’d like an omelet, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.
Who’d want to eat a chicken?
And some dry white toast please.
Give him a drink of water, goddamn it. Will you give him a drink of water, for Christ’s sake? We ain’t gonna shoot.
I told you I ain’t got no agua.
Oh then you ain’t getting no coke. Know what I’m talking about?
The hardest thing is knowing whether I’m still alive.
Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much! It just so happens that your friend here is only mostly dead.
She’s really quite sincerely dead.
This is the moment when the supposedly-dead killer comes back to life, for one last scare.
You and I are even at last. I paid you the life I owe you. And the next time we meet, I can kill you without becoming an evil person.
Do you want my opinion? You need to lighten up.
I never told you, but you sound a little like Dr. Seuss when you’re drunk.
You’re goddamn right I am. Now here come two words for you: Shut the fuck up.
…and somebody oughta belt you in the mouth. But I won’t, I won’t. The hell I won’t!
You punch in at 8:30 every morning, except you punch in at 7:30 following a business holiday, unless it’s a Monday, then you punch in at 8 o’clock. Punch in late… and they dock ya! Incoming articles get a voucher, outgoing articles provide a voucher. Move any article without a voucher… and they dock ya! Letter size a green voucher, oversize a yellow voucher, parcel size a maroon voucher. Wrong color voucher… and they dock ya! 6787049A/6 – that is your employee number. It will not be repeated! Without your employee number you cannot get your paycheck. Inter-office mail is code 37, intra-office mail 37-3, outside mail is 3-37. Code it wrong… and they dock ya! This has been your orientation. Is there anything you do not understand, is there anything you understand only partially? If you have not been fully oriented, you must file a complaint with personnel. File a faulty complaint… and they dock ya!