Because you’re a fucking criminal and you deserve to go where you’re going and I’m gonna take you there and if hear any more shit outta you: I’m gonna fucking bust your head and I’ll put you back in that fucking hole and I’m gonna stick your head in the fucking toilet bowl and I’m gonna make it stay there.
Well, that wasn’t very nice.
beat
It’s only a donkey!
I don’t think it’s nice, you laughing. You see, my mule don’t like people laughing. He gets the crazy idea you’re laughing at him. Now if you apologize, like I know you’re going to, I might convince him that you really didn’t mean it.
Does it sound like I’m laughing, sweetheart?
Why so serious?
I am serious. And stop calling me “Shirley.”
You were serious about that?
Obviously I made a few miscalculations.
I’m quite serious. You’re not here, and neither am I.
As we have no aircraft carrier Nimitz and no Captain Yelland I suggest, asshole, that you stop impersonating some other asshole and get off the air. You’re wasting our time.
Sidney, goddamnit! They practically sank an aircraft carrier! Their missile silos are hot! We’re getting nothing but bullshit from Nemerov! And let’s not forget how this thing started, OK? They tried to kill me, remember! So don’t fucking tell me to be reasonable!
Doesn’t anyone have any missiles left?!?!
Excuse me, sir! Can you direct us to the naval base where they keep the nuclear wessels?
What is it with men and asking for directions?
I just KNEW I shoulda made that left turn at Albuquerque!
Where you come from is gone. Where you thought you were going to weren’t never there. And where you are ain’t no good to you unless you get away from it.
: You wanna see dry land? You really wanna see it? I’ll take you there.
Do you really wanna jump?! Do you WANNA?! Well, that’s fine with me. C’mon, asshole, let’s do it!
Mrs. Peters, in a half-an-hour there’s going to be a full-on nuclear attack. The missiles are on their way now. L.A.'s going to be a desert again very soon.
Ma, listen, pack your stuff and head for Aunt Esther’s. Don’t argue with me; just go.