My favorite in Detroit was the day Colon struck out a bunch of Tigers in a victory. The headline was “wiffs of Colon smother Tigers”.
Bartolo Colon gets the best headlines. I’ve seen these two for him:
“Colon absorbs another pounding”
“Royals To Get A Taste Of Angels’ Colon”
My favorite is one I saw many years ago, reprinted in a National Lampoon book, referring to a game between women’s teams from the University of Washington and the University of Oregon:
“Husky Women Subdue Ducks”
Clinton Licks Beavers
and the Pope is Catholic
When USoCal (Trojans) plays Oregon St (Beavers), it is a great opportunity for some creative headlines. For example:
Trojans Penetrate Beaver Defense.
Not a headline but I remember a caption for many many years ago when Steve Lundquist was a Olympic Swimmer. The Atlanta Journal ran a caption under a picture of Lundquist in a speedo. Caption: Steve Lundquist may be the World’s Best Breaststroker.
delete post
It is not just sports. An old Detroit high school got a new principal. His mission was to clean the school up because it was a filthy mess. He was cleaning and polishing the floors.
It showed a picture of the new principals hface . he was black. The headline was “School has a new Shine”. Where are the proof readers.
A-Rod goes deep, Wang hurt.
In 2000, the Glasgow Celtic football club lost 3-1 at home vs. the much smaller Inverness Caledonian Thistles. The next day the headline was:
That is the opposite of failure. 
Argel Fucks once was the subject of a headline, after being traded to a club elsewhere in Europe:
Fucks off to Benefico
The Super Calley headline is almost as good as Headless Body in Topless Bar.
The Detroit Blows headline with the picture of the one Lion’s head in the crotch of another Lion is unbelievable. I’m sure someone did that on purpose. Probably lost some money on the game. But I can’t believe it made it through the editors.
Number 15 (the last one) on the list.
I immediately thought of the Colon one when I read the thread title.
One that I’ve never seen, but would be appropriate anytime the University of South Carolina loses:
(Tigers, Eagles, etc.) Beat the Cocks
Here is one ,not sports, that is amusing. this cop was very perceptive.