I have the unfortunate duty of making final arrangements for someone close to me. This is in the Netherlands. Their stated preference was for their ashes to be spread in the dunes near the North Sea. Since I have learned first-hand that Dutch funeral companies are easily the equal of their American colleagues in their proficiency in bereaved-raping, I’d like to do this one thing myself.
First question:
What needs to be done to do so legally?
Second, entirely hypothetical question:
If doing it legally is effectively impossible, and one were to do it anyway ( of course I wouldn’t) what would be the consequences if caught?
I can’t help you with the details of Dutch law, but the Netherlands are the go-to location for Germans who want to “launder” ashes in order to take them home - something that is not possible within the German system. So at least I can tell you that in principle it is possible to receive the ashes.
As a veteran North Sea vacationer (though on the wrong side of the Dollart) I can tell you that even in case you are not technically allowed to spread the ashes, as long as you are discreet and pick a suitable location it shouldn’t be a problem.
Looks like you need permission from the municipality where you want to scatter them, and they may charge you for the privilege. So find which of the 403 municipalities you want to scatter them in, and call them up.
German law (specifically, the 16 states’ burial laws) mandates that burials can only be in designated graveyards, or at sea. So German funeral directors cannot legally hand over ashes to the family. This can be circumvented by using a foreign funeral director, purportedly for burial there, which the German funeral director can legally send the ashes to.
Just a head’s up… cremains that come out typically have bone fragments and/or teeth. This may be awkward leaving these on the dunes. You can (at least in the US get any solid bits ground to a fine powder. I spread my Dad’s ashes on Monday and fortunately they were ground. It was like a 7lb bag of gray flour.
A digression, but along similar lines. My wife has the idea (which I thought a good one) of putting a teaspoon of my ashes into a bunch of envelopes, and mailing each one to a non-existent address in each of the 100+ countries that Ive traveled to (no return address). The idea is that the envelopes would then effectively distribute a part of my remains to each of those countries, and over a course of time, find their way to a place of repose, through whatever means of abandonment as may be described in their respective postal regulations.
Anybody have any thoughts on what might really happen?