OK, so it’s another wild Friday night here in Oakie’s Grove. I stumbled through another stress-filled week, capped by a thrilling managers meeting in another town. How do I celebrate? Roman orgy? Strip Club? Order in hookers, pizza, and blow? Nope. Hard living party animal that I am, I decided to take a nap. Yeah, I know. Pathetic. Let’s just say my life these days is…complicated.
Anyway, so I’m merrily napping away. OK, beyond napping. Making Zzzz’s. Sawing logs. Hit REM sleep. Start having an odd dream. It’s about another group to which I belong, totally unrelated to SDMB in any way. Very private group. There have been several new members invited since the last time I attended a gathering of this particular group. Anyway, in the dream, I’m at a group party. Got my mingle on. Meeting the new members, greeting old friends. Suddenly, this exotic woman flits up to me, introduces herself as “mumblesomething” from the SDMB (I seemed to recognize her username in the dream, but can’t recall it now), tells me she’s a huge fan, and just thrilled to meet me. Cool. My overburdened subconcious begins to imagine all sorts of esoteric possibilities involving this enchanting creature in a more private setting.
Then it happened. After gushing about how much she loves my posts, couldn’t wait to meet me, yadda yadda yadda, she calls a friend over to introduce me. Which she does. Except. she. identifies. me. as. Sampiro.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot??? I’ve seen the name mentioned here. Maybe seen a few posts from Sampiro. However, I am not now, nor have I ever been Sampiro. Never met the guy/gal/entity. Don’t think I’ve even had cyber discourse of any kind with Sampiro. Nothing at all against Sampiro. I’m sure he/she/it is a fine human or other intelligent life form, likely kind to kittens, etc. But, I don’t wanna be anybody but good ol’Oakie. Especially when I’m meeting exotic women who seem to not find me repulsive in anyway.
So who the heck is Sampiro, and why is he/she/it stealing the wimmins in my damn dream?
Well, for one thing, Sampiro is gay, so if the exotic woman is interested in him, there might be stuff going on with the exotic woman that might be more, um, exotic than you anticipated.
Oh jeeze. That makes me feel…um…not better…at all. Nothing wrong with a Walk on the Wild Side for those that are so inclined, but I ain’t. Now I don’t know whether to get depressed about losing a Goddess to a gay man, or grateful to a gay man for saving me from accidentally picking up a drag queen…all in a dream.
I’m thinking this may turn in to a night for getting seriously intoxicated. Firing up my Itunes “party mix” play list, and reflecting on the mysteries of life. Or at least getting seriously less than sober.
A long, long time ago…
I can still remember
How that music used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make those people dance
And, maybe, they’d be happy for a while.
[/chairkaraoke]
And for those scoring at home, Rolling Rock makes a fine adult beverage, by domestic weak beer standards. The bottles are kinda cool too. Like green telescopes, sorta…
Well, heck… let me just finish muddling the fresh mint from the garden and juicing this lime and I’ll mix me up a mojito and join y’all… No snacks, thanks, I just finished dinner (venison steaks rolled and wrapped in bacon grilled on the BBQ, fresh green salad with an asian flair made mostly from veggies and basil from the garden, and grilled zucchini, burp!)
Gotta change the station, though, how about a little zydeco or some blues or something?
Now john at the bar is a friend of mine
He gets me my drinks for free
And hes quick with a joke or to light up your smoke
But theres someplace that hed rather be
He says, bill, I believe this is killing me.
As the smile ran away from his face
Well Im sure that I could be a movie star
If I could get out of this place
But we expect to hear from Skynyrd, Janis, Steve Earle, and the Dead within the next hour…gonna get the Led out too.
The makers of Rolling Rock seem to be responsible vendors. I note that the bottle warns be that consuming alcohol impairs your ability to drive a car or operate machinery. Sound advice. I’ll be avoiding both activites for the rest of the evening.
