Good lord, cat, do you *have *to take the description “hershey squirts” so damned literally? That really sounds disgusting.
What I’ve had to say to the dogs relating to the cat, “Dammit, were you eating cat poop again?!”
“Now that your mom and dad are gone, let me grope your balls.”
“Wow, what a cute little uterus!”
“No more kids for you, you whore.”
“We might as well give him a tattoo while he’s out.”
“Put that spiky little penis away, sir. Nobody wants to see that.”
“Hey, did you know if you inject peroxide into a testicle, it bounces? Wanna see?”
“No, no, don’t put your babies in your poop! Oh dear, you’re a terrible mother!”
“Come here, little one. It’s okay. We’re not going to hurt you. We’re only going to hold you down and forcibly inject you with sedatives and then cut you open and rip out your organs in order to make you more docile and take you out of the gene pool.”
“Hmm, you’ve got little virgin nipples. Let’s shave your belly before we poke you.”
I should mention that I do a lot of spay/neuter.
8 to 10 pm usually goes like this : elderly cat (the oldest of 5 at 17 years old) starts howling
cat knock it off cat howls some more
cat you aren’t starving if your that hungry eat the 4 pounds of dry food in your feeder
you don’t get dinner until 10 pm…quit howling ,
cat in the 15 years weve given you soft food has the meowing ever worked ? (no it hasn’t yet )
Cat if you don’t stop youre not getting dinner tonight
cat knock it off before you become the new outside cat
you know cat I know what sauce goes with you…….
cat I wonder if the cave man should of just eaten your kind ……
ect until 10 pm and they get their soft food ………
sometime she starts at 8 sometimes and she doesn’t meow at all …… but when she decides shes hungry ……