I don’t venture into The Pit at all (this is the first Pit thread I’ve ever started in fact), but I am just too effin’ pissed off right now…
What I hate about end users:
I absolutely, completely hate when they bitch and moan about problems with BETA software - and I’m not talking about just reporting bugs - I’m talking about being pissy that there ARE bugs. C’mon people, pay attention! You effing morons - this is NOT READY FOR PRIMETIME SOFTWARE! “Beta” in no way shape or form means its ready for public consumption. You download, install and use beta software, be prepared to encounter problems - even major problems. Every fscking piece of downloadable beta software that comes out has disclaimers all over the place (on the website, in the installer, I’ve seen in ‘em even in help files!) advising people they WILL encounter problems and some of those problems could even cause them to lose valuable data if they choose to risk using the BETA software. If something happens, report the bug but DON’t freakin’ whine about how you lost 3 weeks of work - it’s your own damn fault for using the beta version and using valuable, irreplacable data with it in the first place. Also, know the difference between “bug reporting” and “feature request”. “I don’t like that shade of green” is NOT, I repeat, NOT A BUG!! I don’t want to be going through the bug reports and find how you don’t like that Save button is to the left of the Close button rather than below it! That is NOT A BUG!
I also hate them with every fiber of my being when it’s readily apparent early on that they absolutely REFUSE to learn how to use the software because they “have free support” - Get with the program people - this is TECHNICAL SUPPORT, not “I’m too obtuse to read my help file” support. Now I’m not talking about people who have just brought the software home and started using it - I have no problem with them. It is the people who have been using the software for MONTHS or even YEARS that STILL call in because they can’t be troubled to learn how to print a document - and this is the 3rd time they’ve called in 3 months with the SAME GD QUESTION! Get an effin brain and get off my mother-effin phone! Go take a course at a community college (since apparently all the other schools kicked you out for stupidity)! I DON’T CARE! Just quit wasting my time when I could be doing something useful like help people with REAL problems rather than sitting here and listen to you suck the soul out of me, you moronic, crack-smoking, steaming pile of dung.
Finally, I am sick and tired of the people feeling like they deserve to have everything handed to them. “Can’t you make a free version rather than a paid version - I like the software, but not enough to pay for it” What? You arrogant piece of crap! Have you ever thought that maybe, just maybe, those that work for the company would LIKE TO HAVE MONEY TO BUY FOOD! Not everyone (hell, not many at all) that develops software drives a Ferrari like Cormack or something - these people have to earn a (probably well-under-market-worth) paycheck just like you - or are you just special because you snap your fingers and Daddy buys you a new “Hammerin’ Hank” dildo to cram up your useless craphole after you wear the old one out and you expect everyone around you to fall all over themselves doing the same? If you really like the software, buy the damn thing, otherwise shut the F up and go away, you sorry sack of shit. And if you do find a Warez version, don’t EVEN think of trying to get technical support - otherwise I will hunt you down and throttle your neck until every single zit on your pimple-encrusted face pops all at once!
Don’t be doing any of the above and we’ll get along fine; otherwise, I’m going to make your life miserable and you’ll wish you had never, ever called me.