Suck My Outraged Ass, Red Light Runner!

The BBQ Pit
1

You bastard. You thoughtless, brainless, gelatinous mass of stupid.

You certainly were in a hurry, weren’t you? You just couldn’t wait to be wherever the hell it is you needed so desperately to be. So you ran that red light. You ran it, not slowing down a bit through the intersection. And so you slammed right into my father’s car. The driver’s side, I might add.

If my father had been going any faster through that LEGAL green light, you would’ve slammed into the driver’s side door instead of merely the door joint. My father could’ve been seriously hurt, you ignorant little prick, and might have been nonetheless if Dad hadn’t been wearing his seat belt.

I’m glad my father wasn’t hurt. I thank God that he was able to come home and tell me about the accident instead of me hearing it from a stranger in a phone call. No thanks to you, you heaping mass of putrescence.

The car’s in the shop right now, and we have a rental car, which is nice, I guess. But nothing compares to being able to wrap my arms around my Dad and kiss his cheek tonight.

You were lucky this time, pal. If my Dad had been hurt, if even the white part of his fingernail had been broken off, your ass would be in a world of trouble, I’d make sure of it. I would see you prosecuted to the FULL extent of the law, instead of the two measly tickets you garnered that day.

So, in closing, I say this to you. Fuck you. Fuck you with a sandpaper-covered machete coated in that acid used to remove warts. I hope you get reamed royally by both your insurance company and the garage fixing our banged-up little car. And then, the machete again.

And, finally, a miniscule thank you for making me appreciate my Daddy that much more.

But mostly the machete.

2

Wow. What an asshole. I swear they’ll give anyone a license these days. I’m glad your dad is ok, and I hope this goat-feltching MF gets everything he’s got coming to him!

3

Ever consider writing comedic poetry?

Sorry about what happened, luckily it could of been waaay worse.

4

How did this guy get away? Did he hit your dad’s car, then just drive off? I can’t tell whether he was “caught” (and thus is probably/hopefully being punished), or if he wasn’t (meaning he left the scene of an accident, and SOMEONE should be trying to track him down, even if your dad wasn’t hurt).

5

KCSuze said that the bastard “garnered” a couple of tickets that day. Hope they were for that incident.

I’ve been in an accident involving a red-light runner. Seat belts for me and the driver were a boon that day – but the slam was bruising, and major repairs were needed to the car.

Bastard impatient fuckers.

6

He didn’t get away, he stayed after the accident. I mentioned in my OP that the guy got two tickets. One was for running the red light, the other was for failing to yield.

And thanks, Teelo. I used to write some comedic stories, but I kind of lost inspiration a while ago. Funny what rage does for creativity.

7

Ice Wolf, they were for that incident. Seems he got off light to me, but I’m not a police officer.

8

Just a couple of tickets sounds light to me, KCSuze. If they’re just fines, definitely. The guy should lose his licence for long enough for him to learn the road rules.

9

People run red lights for reasons other then ignorance of the law or being an asshole. I’ve been the passenger in cars were the driver was distracted, or otherwise had a brain lapse–which happens to us all, on occaison–and breezed through a red light before (fortunately on empty intersections).

Sometimes, an accident is just an accident, and taking away his license (and with it likely his job, social life, etc.) would be overkill.

10

In Colorado, the two tickets cited add up to seven points on his license. Not enough to lose the license in itself, but you can hope he already had some points on his record.

11

No, this is bullshit. When you get into a car it is your responsibility to keep your mind focused on what you are doing, which is maneuvering a large, heavy hunk of steel along a road with several other large, heavy hunks of steel. If talking to your passengers distracts you, then shut up. If fiddling with your radio distracts you, then turn it off. If talking on your cell phone distracts you, then don’t use it. Keep your damn eyes on the road and keep your mind on the task at hand. I don’t want to be the guy crossing the street when you have a fucking brain fart at a red light.

12

I see that happen every day on my 40 mile daily commute to my job. I have almost been nailed mysefl … the light is green in front of me, one assumes that means I can safely go … but no, you have to look because of idiots like that gelatinous mass of stupid. Did you ever find out what was so goddamn important that he needed to run the red, or was he just talking on his cell phone/eating fast food/thumbing through the mobile phone book/apply grooming products/ watching a DVD - and/or any/all of the aforementioned important duties that might detract from his driving? I wonder when I see one of those people, what they tell the authorities when an accident happens, what they were doing exactly. I am so glad you dad is okay. Give him a hug from me.

13

NOTHING that I said contradicts ANY of the above.

If you, Q.E.D., are going to stand on a fucking pedestal and profess that you’ve never been distracted while driving, and never accidently broken a traffic law, then I’ll go sit on a greased pumpkin if you’re telling the truth.

I NEVER said that the other driver wasn’t responsible for his actions. I NEVER said that he shouldn’t be punished. I said that it was an accident, and that–just maybe–a severe punishment (and, in this country, revocation of driving privileges IS a severe punishment) isn’t warranted! I know that contradicts the Holy Spirit of the BBQ Pit, where every target of an OP is a presumed hideous law-breaking dangerous-intent filled monster who deserves to languish in a Syrian prison until the slow death of peritonitis finally ends it all, but, fuck me, I just don’t see any evidence in the OP that the person who caused the accident is an eeeeeevvviiilll bastard. Sorry. :rolleyes:

14

You never said he was responsible. You never said he should be punished. All you said was he shouldn’t lose his license. Certainly the implication I got from your post was that he wasn’t really responsible, after all he’s only human and maybe wasn’t paying attention. Fuck that, he’s an asshole, plain and simple.

Please point to where I said I’d never broken any traffic laws. Certainly, I’ve done things I shouldn’t have, and they were absolutely my own damn fault. But, to the best of my knowledge, I’ve never been so completely out of it that I ran right through a red light. If I had, I’d have been an asshole too.

15

Yes, but I said that in response to a poster (whom I quoted) who was saying that fines weren’t enough. I don’t understand how disagreeing with that implies that I don’t think he was responsible or that he shouldn’t be punished. Quite the opposite, really: that I was only objecting to the severity of the punishment sort of implies that I agree the driver fucked up.

Explain how I implied that. Seriously–maybe I’m making rhetorical errors that I’m unaware of, and it’s confusing people. As far as I know, I said two things in that post: the driver made a mistake, which can happen to anyone; and that taking away his license would be overkill. I don’t see were either of those implies I don’t think the driver is culpable for what happened. Does not explicitly condemning his behaviour mean that I condone it?

Heh. Maybe we just disagree over what an “asshole” is. I think of assholism has a long-term, often incurable disease that can be diagnosed by a consistent pattern of willfull ignorance or harmful intentions. Making an occaisonal mistake (even a big one) ain’t enough to get me to call someone an asshole, except under my breath. :slight_smile:

16

It’s just that the first part of your post sort of brushed off the incident as a normal, everyday occurrence. The whole thing just sort of left me with the impression that you thought the guy was anything other than completely at fault.

For the record, I think if more driving offenses resulted in suspended driving privileges, people would pay more attention on the road and there wouldn’t be as many accidents. If losing one’s privileges results in an inconcenience for them, well, boo hoo. There can’t be that many people so isolated from civilization that they can’t get rides from friends, neighbors or relatives, or, Og forbid, public transportation. If you really can’t afford to lose your license, then pay attention to the road.

17

Glad your dad is ok. My beautiful girlfriend is permanently crippled (unless someday they can clone her a new knee) because of a woman who ran a red light. The other woman said she was “distracted”.

18

My mom once ran a red light and hit a car. Oh, it was awful. She somehow missed the red light—there were two of them right near each other, and she just . . . missed the second one. Of course it was all her fault and of course she should have been paying better attention. But she certainly isn’t an “asshole.”

I wasn’t there, but I don’t think the other driver thought she was an “asshole” either. (Poor guy—I think he broke his arm, and it was a new car he was driving!) My mom was sincerely contrite and horrified by what happened. No trying to shift blame, no trying to excuse herself. She apologized profusely to the poor guy, so much so that he patted her on the arm and tried to comfort her. (Suffice it to say, he was obviously a very nice guy.) My mom still talks about that guy and says that she often thinks of him and prays that he will have many good things in his life. And she still hasn’t gotten over her utter remorse and horror of running that red light.

19

Preach it, brother (or sister).

I’ve been making a similar argument over in the Janklow thread. Yes, people do make mistakes, but the fact that it happens so often just shows that some people don’t pay enough fucking attention when they’re in control of 2 tonnes of speeding metal. Maybe some harsher sentences for “mistakes” like running a red light would teach people to wake up a bit, especially when those mistakes have such potentially deadly consequences. Driving a car, in case anyone forgot, is not one of the rights enumerated in the Constitution or its amendments…

Also, living here in Baltimore, which has about the worst drivers that i’ve seen (based on experience on four continents), i know that many people who run red lights are not just guilty of a momentary lapse in concentratin. When you hear a car gun its engines from 150 feet back in a vain attempt to beat the red, you know there’s no accident about it at all–just pure, unadulterated, idiotic selfishness. It happens way too often, and has inculcated in me the habit of waiting for a second or two after the light turns green, just in case one of these cunts happens to be crossing my path.

20

Running a red light is a chronic behavior where I live, (Metro East St. Louis Area) so I was not at all surprised to hear that it was the cause of the accident. Every time I go to the mall, at the intersection where you turn into the main parking lot, there are several cars that run a single red light at any given time. As Krebnut said, even when you have a green light, you have to be on the lookout for cars running red lights. My father knows this, and looked. Still this guy hit him.

When I first posted the OP, I hadn’t asked my father too many questions about the accident, as he was still shaken up from it and didn’t seem to want to talk about it. I knew better than to press. Today I asked him what reason the other driver gave for running the red light, and he said, “None.” I asked if the other driver apologized, he said no. He didn’t say much of anything, according to Dad. No apology, no reason.

Verdict: Asshole.

Yosemitebabe, I didn’t imply that everyone who runs a red light is an asshole. At least I didn’t mean to. But this man, who slammed into my father’s tiny little compact car, certainly is.

Personally, I think more accidents could be avoided if people just paid more attention to their driving. To quote the venerable Crow T. Robot, “Why don’t they look?”