It’s less than a week to go until my vacation, and I’ve never needed time off more than I do now. I’ve become absent-minded and indecisive from all the work this summer. In fact, this week I’ve written 2 nearly complete puzzle stories, and I can’t decide which one to use. So I guess I’ll use both. Each story is complete save for a single word (and it’s NOT the same word for both stories). The stories begin in an identical fashion but then take different paths.
You know how these puzzle stories work. Each sentence has something in common and the challenge is to discover that common factor. Each tale has only one word that will fill in the blank, complete the story, and have all the sentences follow the pattern.
What is the word that completes story #1?
What is the word that completes story #2?
If you are having trouble figuring out the proper words and need some hints, I recommend you use Hint #1, Hint #2, and Hint #4 from Sunday Morning Puzzle #24. Hint #3 from that puzzle will not work for this one. However, if you change Hint #3 to read “License (5)”, you’ll have four good hints.
By the way, if you do solve this puzzle you’ll also be able to solve Sunday Morning Puzzle #24. It’s been over a month and I really want to know what happens to Bossy, Babe, and Martin van Buren.
“Expd Admin Asst Wntd” had read the classified ad in the tattered Sunday newspaper. Jay hated to have to apply for this kind of work, but in these difficult times, what were his options? However when he climbed the stone steps and pushed open the wooden door, he was unprepared for the view that met his eyes.
Sitting on a decrepit stool, quite close to the farthest paint-peeling wall, sat Betsy Ross. In her hands she held an absurdly long needle, a spool of bright neon-green thread, and a nearly finished flag. Jay watched her hand move rapidly up and down as Betsy sewed the mysterious banner. Suddenly, waving the needle and thread in a menacing manner she said, “Well, if you’re here to assist, then assist!”
“My suggestions for this flag would be to eliminate that silly sword in the corner, to delete the coiled serpent in the middle, and to replace those pukish-green moons with stars,” Jay answered.
“Then I’ve no need for this green thread at all,” Betsy sneered as she threw the spool across the room. “But you’re not here to criticize my flagmaking, you’re here to ________ the Betsy Ross Newsletter.”
As Ms. Ross reached for more thread, Jay was happy to see that the only colors she had left were red, white, and blue.
“Expd Admin Asst Wntd” had read the classified ad in the tattered Sunday newspaper. Jay hated to have to apply for this kind of work, but in these difficult times, what were is options? However, when he climbed the stone steps and pushed open the wooden door, he was unprepared for the view that met his eyes.
Ten men, who stood neatly lined up in a row, were guzzling (and not in moderation) ten giant fizzing alcoholic beverages. What struck Jay most about this quaffing queue of sots was that they were all dressed in priestly attire.
One of the potted priests bellowed out,“It is time for the black mass to begin now that our assistant has arrived!”
Jay made a move for the door and stammered, “Umm…maybe this job is not for me.”
Then the priests yelled in unison,“Halt the black mass, we’ve another quitter on our hands!”
Though shaken by this bizarre incident, Jay went home and ate a __________.