No.
What was tacky was the little girl in my son’s pre-school class who wore shorts with writing on the back and Brittney Spears t-shirts. That is tacky. Dressing your daughter like a hoochie mama is beyond tacky and it was really no surprise when her father was arrested for trying to rape the 13 year old baby sitter - but that’s a whole other topic.
Whenever my ex or his parents had something to say about anything I’d just put a big ole smile on my face and say in my most cheerful voice that if they didn’t like the way I dressed him for school then they were more than welcome go come get him in the morning and dress him themselves.
Same thing when they were horrified, just horrified that I wasn’t taking him to church. They were welcome to come pick him up on their way to church, I’d even have him dressed and ready to go.
They never took me up on it. Guess it wasn’t so important to them after all.
Funny how other people want to tell you how to do things as long as the only effort they have to make is running their mouths.
Anyway, at that age kids need to be comfortable. As long as the clothes are clean, fit and are weather appropriate what else matters? If the school isn’t complaining then there is no problem.
Not necessarily. I babysat my cousin when she was 4-5 years old. I would let her pick her own outfits, and occasionally they were pretty goofy. I think it’s important for a young kid to feel like they have control over something in their life, and clothes are an easy way to do that.
How the child is dressed makes a big difference socially. Like it or not, some parents are less likely to invite him for a playdate if he looks sloppy or unkempt. While those may not be the parents you would choose as buddies, their child may be the one your child most wants to play with.
My ex lets his mother go to k-mart and buy brightly colored (I mean neon) animal print dresses made of double-knit polyester and he sends her to school that way on a regular basis. It makes me sick, frankly, and absolutely affects her self-esteem and social life. Of course, she is a good deal older.
Please look at all of these questions solely from your son’s point of view. Remove your ex from the question and put it to yourself “XX topic has been raised; what affect will Y and Z approaches have on my child?” Don’t let the source dictate your responses.
I only allow my kid to go on play dates with children dressed in seersucker material or better. That’s how I became good friends with Tom Wolfe’s great-grandkids.
Well clearly there are sliding scales of strokes for sliding scales of folks at play here but at the very least you can see where the ex-wife is coming from.
Bear in mind that everyone parents a little bit differently, so we shouldn’t be too hard on someone for how they choose to raise their child.
That said, your ex is being batshit loco. My wife and I have dressed our boys in such pants (we call them “fuzzy pants”) from ages 0-5 and I would never think they were inappropriate for anything except maybe a funeral. Maybe.
I’m in the camp that says sweats are tacky at school, even for kids. Sweats are athletic gear or lounging around the house clothes. Not school clothes.
Jeans and that skull t-shirt you mentioned sound good to me.
I’ve mentioned before that I do a lot of guardian ad litem work in custody cases. As a GAL, I’m more interested in whether the child is wearing clean clothes, appropriate for the weather and anticipated activity. “Tacky” only blips my radar if it means the child is wearing clothes with adult language/pictures, drug references, age-inappropriate designs, or something similar.
Monitoring this all morning from my phone, but I hate replying like that. Wasn’t really looking for advice just seeing if I was crazy for thinking that there was nothing wrong with those pants.
First, to clarify “The Pants”…again, they are not fat-man-drawstrting-elastic-cuff pants. They ARE black soft cotton pants. They have pockets, and are more styled than sweatpants, thought they are still certainly casual. I would feel comfortable classifying them as ‘active wear’. I tried to find a picture but didn’t have any luck.
Second, 95% of the time I put him in a nice outfit that includes jeans, khakis or cargo pants. Or shorts, now that it’s warm. I like him to look nice and he generally doesn’t put up a fight if I give him two shirts to pick from. So I DON’T send him to school looking “unkempt”.
Is it a hill I wish to die on? Not really. I just replied that I didn’t feel that there is anything wrong with those pants, and when he’s at my house I’ll dress him how I feel is appropriate.
You want to know the real kicker? It was 60 degrees this morning and it’s going to be warm…and there is a nice-looking pair of blue shorts in his backpack that I sent with him Friday because I knew it would be warm today.
I dropped him off with her Friday morning (at which time, btw, I told her about the extra shorts)…I pick him back up today from day care after work , so he went to school today in the clothes I dropped him off with.
You’re not crazy or wrong for being bothered by the request. She’s not wrong with having preferences either, but she needs to understand that when the child is with you, it’s your choice on what he gets to wear. As long as he’s within the bounds of public decency, then his clothes are fine. What’s next? Her nitpicking your color selection? The line has to be drawn somewhere unless she’s inviting you to nitpick her choices.
In my opinion sweat pants are no big deal. I have 2 daughters, and most of the time my oldest in yoga pants. No biggie. She is not allowed to wear them to school, mind you.
And I am with the poster who wrote no writing on the back of pants. I would never, ever, dress my girls in this manner. I see kids dressed like this a lot. With words like “CUTE” and “PINK” going across their butt. I honest to God do not know what their parents are thinking.
Also, the PINK thing that is so fashionable today. I will never let my daughters where anything that says “PINK” on it. :smack: For those who do not know, this is a line from Victoria’s Secrets.
