Sweet sixteen and never had multiple orgasms during anal sex while swallowing!

Good lord, could there BE any more sex threads in IMHO right now? I mean, look, it’s turning me into Chandler Bing! Everywhere I turn, there are kids asking whether or not they’re normal for masturbating into a sock while looking at naked pictures of Bea Arthur or something. What’s next, some guy’s girlfriend wanting to fuck him up the ass with a giant dildo?

Listen, if you think your sex life is so damned dysfunctional, then post it on a sex advice board, not here. Not everyone wants to picture the other people here getting teabagged while listening to their audio tape of whale noises, okay?

I think I remember that thread…

But it’s all right if we’re just horny, right?

Drain - I was going to post this (without the catchy title) but since you did I can only say I agree completely. Have you ever been tested for psychic abilities?

What I posted instead was intended to be my commentary on all the sex threads going but it has sadly turned into more of what your title suggests. I am pleased that some people got it and were amused…

Someone has to say it.

If it’s not on your drivers license I don’t want to see it.

I know some will say “if you don’t want to see it don’t look” so I will pre-empt them with a big “shut the fuck up”. I go to IMHO and it’s all over the place like bug splatter on my windshield. You can’t miss it.

And if anyone here masturbates into a sock while looking at photos of Bea Arthur I can only say that you are definately sick and should seek psychological counselling immediately.

Thanks for putting that visual into my head Drain… really.

Well, I’m tired of hearing about people’s appetites. Everywhere you turn, someone’s talking about food. It’s disgusting! Don’t they have any decency? I’m sick and tired of people talking about food as though it’s an acceptable subject. There are children on this board, for gosh sakes.

Hey, I saw that movie. Ball Me, Ishmael.

Dear Lord I am so with you Drain! I just so fucking DO NOT CARE about other people’s sex lives and the details thereof.

I just laughed-no, laughed so hard I snorted over this line. Right at work!

I was thinking the same thing, particularly about sunrise_4836. I didn’t want to drag “her” into the pit, but sheesh! Brand spanking new member, and she covers the place with anal sex, swallowing, cherry stem tying, wet dream having threads. Very odd. I think you know who I thought it was at first :wink:

Anyway, in her birthday wish thread, I wished someone would buy her a sex manual.


Yep the sex threads are definitely boring and a waste of bandwidth. Course most of them are started by posters younger than 20 so that explains a lot of it.
Good thread DB.

Umm…what is being teabagged?

(clearly I’ve been married too long.)

BTW, kudos to Lux Fiat for Ball me, Ishmael. That was freaking hilarious.

Nah. Salon.com already covered that.

Yep… once we get older and are getting all the sex we ever wanted we tend to become a little less obsessed with it don’t we?

Can I see a show of hands on this?

Cheffie, lie down on your back (preferrably nekkid) and I will stick my balls on your face. Woo…the fun ensues. That is teabagging. Not too interesting huh?


PS. Hilarious, DB. :slight_smile:


I’m 18, and I’m not obsessed with sex…

Chef Troy: Watch the film Pecker for an explanation.

I think the threads are the work of a few people who seem to be unable to find soft core erotica sites. They tend to be started by the same people over and over, and then voyerism kicks in.

Let me tell you about my last orgy…


Mmmm. Bea Arthur …

I think sunrise_somerandomnumber is the biggest offender, especially since they were all hit-and-run postings. When manhattan closed one of her threads and cyber-slapper her a little, I sent him and email thanking him.

And I’m a little guilty, since I started a vibrator thread.

I dunno. I find them amusing. Actualy human beings (for the most part) being willing to share either usual (for the sake of reassurance) or unusual things they’ve done between the sheets…why not?

If I got a “what I’d change” vote, it’d be the folks who hit every thread on the damned board and say (paraphrased) “Flirt with me. Now. Topic be damned.” You know who you are. Actually, you probably don’t, because most of you are the “cool people” who no one ever says anything negative about because they don’t want the REST of the “quantity is more important than quality” “flirt” people (I put it in quotes because while the actual quality of the flirting sucks, it is still playful solicitation for sex so it has to count) to ram three-page long rants about “ganging up on people” up your ass.

<catching breath>

Anyhow, I don’t find the sex threads offensive at all. At least, unlike MANY threads, they’re well-labeled enough that you can avoid them on sight.

Sex is just as relevant a topic as any and a hell of alot for fun for me to read than politics. I suppose one could say “if you have a sex question, go to a sex website”. But then one could say “if you have a political bitch, go to a politics website.”, “if you have a computer bitch, go to a computer newsgroup”, and so on. Basically it’d leave this place all Cecil, all the time. Thats not much fun.

Get over the fact that there are posters with one track minds, or threads that seem ridiculous to some of us. Different strokes for different folks.

The upshot is that if you don’t like reading sex threads, they are clearly marked as such. Just steer clear. Don’t start doling out social policy. For all of you people screaming “I don’t care about your sex life!”, why the hell would you open a thread titled “Anal Sex” or “Swallowing” then?

Of the recent crop, I find the hit and run nature of them more annoying than the choice of topic.

I thought this was another Baiting thread.

Yeah, I’m sick of it, too. I alternate being a prude and a complete reprobate, and I’m in prude mode today.

So you’re popping Vicodin like Tic-Tacs?