My sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s wife (got that?) is going to be induced this Friday, and she was wondering if she was supposed to bring a present with her to visit the new mom at the hospital. I thought probably not, since there are official showers that she went to, but I wasn’t postive on the proper etiquette.
Thanks, in advance, for you input!
I don’t think a gift would be expected, if there have already been shower gifts. Flowers are nice, but it’s perfectly okay to visit without taking something. Just be sure to fuss over the baby and nobody will care what else you do.
If you were planning on bringing a gift eventually, I think it’s better to bring it to her once she’s been home with the baby for a bit - maybe in a week or so. Everybody wants to see a new mother at the hospital, but often it ends up being very draining, I think.
If you just aren’t sure whether you should have something in-hand to take to the hospital, no, it’s not necessary at all. Flowers are nice but if you know she’s going to have a room full of them, no need to give her more dying things. 
If she takes something to the hospital, they’re going to have to lug it out to the car when they go home, load it up, then bring it into the house–along with the baby, all the associated paraphanalia, and Mom’s luggage. If she wants to give a gift, it’s far better to bring it to the house once they’ve had a chance to get settled. Of course, gifts are never expected in this sort of situation, though they’re welcome and appreciated.
What CrazyCatLady said. I think the best present would be food; a casserole or lasagna or something that the exhausted parents could pull out of the freezer and chunk into the oven. New babies are a blast, but they’re very tiring; I would have loved to have some stocked up food in the freezer when I brought the mini-Marli home.
What she said 
When my kids were newborns, it was nearly impossible to simply get a meal on the table. Casseroles etc. (especially something freezable that they can have later) would be gratefully accepted. Someone brought us a ginormous lasagna and we ate that thing for a week. Best gift we got!!!
Don’t bring a gift to the hospital, in fact I wouldn’t even plan on visiting the hospital unless you’re very close to the new parents (and maybe not even then).
If you didn’t bring a gift to a baby shower, feel free to take it by their house after they return home. But make sure you also bring food, or do a chore or something while you’re there. They’ll appreciate it far more than another stuffed bunny.
Yes, she should bring chocolate.
*Always * bring chocolate.
Or, what everyone else said.
Just the opposite take on food.
I didn’t have room in the freezer for the stuff people brought over. They were well intentioned, but I only have the small freezer on my fridge - and that is filled.
I have the same tiny freezer problem.
My favorite food gift to bring a new mom or a convalescent is a package of soup starter. One company in particular, Frontier Soups (google - I don’t want to link to the commercial site) makes absolutely spectacular freeze-dried soups. They are small (about 2 cups of stuff in a bag) and freeze-dried, so they store forever in your pantry. Freeze-dried means they rehydrate to actual fresh texture, as opposed to dehydrated mushy stuff. They’re also made with no salt or MSG. Add broth, meat, some veggies any you have soup to feed 8 to 12. I’m sure there are other great ones out there, but these have been my favorite for a couple of years.
But I’d bring it to the house in a week or so. They’ll have enough crap to lug home, as well as learning to juggle the car seat for the first time.
If you feel you just have to bring something, why not bring a prepaid calling card? It’s small, and comes in SO handy for making those announcement calls or to let anyone know if problems arise. And if they don’t use it in the hospital, it’s still good for later use!
I’ll chime in and say to please NOT bring anything to the hospital. When I had the babe in July, my husband had to make 3 trips to the car the day he brought us home, and that was before loading me and the newfangled carseat with the baby in it! People’s intentions were good, but it was a lot of stuff to lug around, and we were trying to figure out how to get ourselves and this new baby out of the hospital in one piece as it was.
Bring stuff to their home a few weeks after they’re settled, and bring FOOD! One of my “traditions” when someone I know has a baby is to buy them a bunch of groceries. I go to the store before my visit and stock up on fruit, juice boxes, granola bars, frozen dinners, yogurt, pre-cooked baked chicken tenders, cut up veggies, healthy things new parents can grab and eat in a hurry, preferably with one hand which is how I ate every meal for the first 8 weeks of the babe’s life.
Someone brought us some gift certificates to a local pizza delivery place which was great, too.
My well-meaning mother in law brought us bags and bags of fresh vegetables from their garden. A wonderful bounty, of course, but how on earth was I going to find the time to prepare 3 grocery bags full of zucchini? If you’re going to bring someone stuff like that, have the sense to make something with it before you give it to them. I ended up giving most of it away before it went bad.
Thanks! I’ll pass all this on to my sis. Bring nothing to the hospital, but storable food items are good in a few weeks, at home
As are size one disposable diapers. Even if they use cloth - disposibles come in handy for trips outside the house. And you go through a ton of them.
For my son, I asked my friends to give me a diaper shower - and they did. Everyone brought a package of disposible diapers. It was great. And I used every last diaper they brought - wish I could say the same for all the other gifts I got.
Actually, I vote for size 2 or 3, as size 1s don’t fit for very long, and some babies are big enough when born that they don’t even fit in 1s at all. 2 or 3 is just about guaranteed to be needed somewhere down the line, and it comes in handy to have packages of the next size at hand when you realize just after opening a new package that it’s time to move up.
I am going to second an earlier statement about maybe skipping the hospital visit all together. I wasinduced for 3 days (yeah, you heard me) before the stubborn little one appeared. I was beat, and the constant parade of people I had to entertain only made it worse, especially since I gae birth at 3 AM, and people started arriving at 8 AM. I appreciated me the people who did a quick congradulatory phone call, then followed up with a visit at home in a couple of weeks.
I would have liked a visit while I was in the hospital. I think the prepaid calling cards or chocolate are good ideas. Not a big box of chocolate, but a little one. Something to read is also a good choice, especially a common periodical with the baby’s birthday on it. After I gave birth, I found for the first time in months, I could concentrate enough to read. I did not have much time, but I had some and was glad of things to read. A magazine published on the birthday could make a nice keepsake too.
The most important things are:
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Dote on the baby, but don’t touch unless offered. It is ok to ask to hold, but also offer to wash your hands first.
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Pay attention to the mom, but don’t ask any questions that you don’t want the answers to.
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Keep the visit short. She will probably be glad to see you, glad you came to visit, but she will be very glad for you to leave most likely too.
It doesn’t sound like grettle is visiting, her sister is. Her sister’s boyfriend is the new father’s brother, so he is certainly expected (and presumably eager) to make a hospital visit to see his new niece or nephew. It sounds like he’ll be bringing his girlfriend, which is the reason for the post.
Another vote for prepared meals brought to the house - by far the best post-birth gift we got. She/they could also offer to do a load of laundry when they visit the house - normal housework falls by the wayside as well with a newborn.
That is correct, I will not be visiting. My sister actually has to make the appearance for her boyfriend because he is currently stationed in Qatar. She and the new mom are kind of friends, and my sister is so excited about the new baby! I told her no gifts at the hospital, but that when visiting at home a few weeks later, she should do a chore or too, and that I would help her make a casserole to bring.
I love this place. You guys are so helpful!
Sounds good. You might want to have her call and say “I’ll bring dinner for your hubby and you for tonight, don’t worry about it” That takes care of the freezer space problem.
So would a stand-alone freezer be a good baby gift? I don’t mean a chest freezer, but we’ve got one that’s just a bit larger than a mini-fridge out in the laundry room. If breast milk can be frozen, a freezer could be useful for quite a while after the food gifts are gone.
My thought is like WhyNot’s if she’s not sick to her stomach, chocolate is a good gift. Find out her favorite kind and bring some along with you