"Teams in the Toilet" - The 0-16 NFL Season Thread (2012 ed.)

The Game Room
1

Getting a bit of a late start this season, sorry. At least it lets slightly less-worse teams get out of the running before we even begin. The goal here is to buckle down and go perfect, just like the old Bucs and the recent Lions. If every team manages to botched-punt their way into an accidental victory, well continue to keep track of the worst team anyway.
With INT-happy rookie QBs, the Browns and Dolphins look like front-runners for that #1 pick next year. I’m going to pick the Dolphins myself, how about you?

Winless going into the second Sunday are:

  • NY Giants (0-1) : After losing this season’s Kickoff Game to the Cowboys, NY is sure to eventually get a win, not that they deserve it. Next up, the Buccaneers.
  • Saints (0-1) : They helped usher in a new NFL star last week. A talented team in disarray now reaping some karma weeds. Next up, the Panthers*.
  • Panthers (0-1) : So much for taking the next step, with only 10 yards the Panthers couldn’t even crawl against the Bucs. Next up, the Saints*.
  • Seahawks (0-1) : Even an extra time out couldn’t net the sorry Seahawks a win, I see them going 7-9 this year. Next up, the Cowboys.
  • Rams (0-1) : Continuing their woes from last year, three picks couldn’t get a win against Detroit. Next up, the Redskins.
  • Bills (0-1) : Mario who? Don’t know much about the team, but isn’t their star RB hurt? Next up, the Chiefs*.
  • Dolphins (0-1) : The best part is, we all get to see the inside of this toilet bowl! Next up, the Raiders*.
  • Bengals (0-1) : The Bungles made the playoffs last year. This year, doing well in this competition. Next up, the Browns*.
  • Browns (0-1) : Which saucer-eyed college star should they have getting sacked and throwing picks? Soon they might have another one to choose between. Next up, the Bengals*.
  • Steelers (0-1) : I just love it that they’re on this list. Next up, the Jets.
  • Titans (0-1) : By being that week’s sacrifice to the Pats, we don’t really know if the Titans belong here. (They do.) Next up, the Chargers.
  • Colts (0-1) : They sucked for Luck last year, now they suck with Luck. Next up, the Vikings.
  • Jaguars (0-1) : To me they’re just the South’s expansion team named for a big cat that doesn’t have Cam Newton. Next up, the Texans.
  • Chiefs (0-1) : The Chefs are without some key players. So nice to have an excuse for the coming losses. Next up, the Bills*.
  • Raiders (0-1) : Long snapper goes down, and still playing on the A’s dirt. Sigh. Next up, the Dolphins*.

A number of matchups this week are between two 0-fer teams, marked with *, so we’ll being saying goodbye to at least a few of these worthy “competitors.”

2

Almost no chance anyone goes 0-16 this year. I doubt anyone hits 0-8. No truly horrible teams.

3

I think the best shot is Cleveland. They’re just plain terrible.

4

After a 1 point loss to a good team? People are having a pretty strong overreaction all things considered. No way.

5

I really don’t think the Eagles are a “good” team.

6

Yeah, I don’t see any 0-16 teams this season either. The Browns have a good defense. They will win at least a few games. Just not today!

:smiley:

7

At least the Colts are out! Woo-hoo!

8

I think the Jaguars and Raiders have the best chance. Jaguars are sticking with Gabbert and the Raiders looked so bad in that Monday Night opener. Like high school bad.

ETA: Just noticed that Gabbert got hurt in today’s game and was replaced by… Chad Henne. Yeah, Jax is screwed this year.

9

The Chiefs haven’t looked all that great, either. I bet the Raiders can beat them.

10

If Reggie Bush and the other half of the Dolphins thoroughly trounced the Raiders, it might be tighter than you think!

So how many others get stricken from the list this week?

11

Rams win! Rams win! Rams win!

12

When they not only lose, but get spanked righteously and damn near blanked by the Bills, I think you have to put the Chiefs at the top of the list.

13

Yeah, that score was closer than it looked. Both KC TDs were pretty late in the game.

14

My vote so far for #1 draft pick is KC. They look terrible.

15

So it looks like we are down to just these:
Saints
Browns
Titans
Jaguars
Chiefs
Raiders

Did I miss any?

16

Nope. You got 'em all.

17

Saints are the only team left in the NFC without a win. And the NFC West is 5-1 outside the division!

18

There are 32 teams in the NFL so, ignoring rare ties, after the first week, 16 will be 0-1. After the second week assuming random wins 8 will be on average. (Note there are no byes in the first two weeks.) Since losses are presumably correlated – bad teams lose – we’d actually expect more than 8, but we have fewer this year.

19

Looks like KC might wiggle out of 0-16 contention. Right now it’s a 24-24 tie and going into overtime against the Saints, after KC put 18 unanswered points on the board to get to a tie.

20

KC is off the 0-16 list.