More and more lately I find myself obsessed with shoes. I’ve got a closet fulla the freakin’ things now and yet I want more. I’m not sure just how many pairs I own, but I’d bet it’s around 3 dozen. And it’s not only that, there’s shoelaces and shoe polish and brushes and polishing cloths to be bought too.
I feel I have to shine the damned things after wearing them only a couple times, especially the 4 pairs of black dress shoes, and I always remove the laces prior to polishing them. My more casual loafers I must brush, wipe with a damp cloth, and spray with silicone waterproofing every couple weeks. I’m also obsessed with tying them; at the slightest hint of loose laces, I gotta re-tie the damned things.
Is this weird? For a guy? Has Imelda Marcos taken posession of my soul? Does Kiwi polish run in my veins? Was I perhaps Thom McAnn in a previous life? Am I the bastard son of Dr. Scholl?
In truth, I read through the first two paragraphs of your post thinking, “Damn! I was sure UncleBeer was a guy!”.
I don’t think you are weird. I think you either A) need a new hobby; or B) are asserting control over you life in the easiest way you can [/armchair analysis].
Imelda has not taken over your soul unless you have started building showcases in your closet for all the shoes.
Welcome to the fold, brother. Now, granted, there are mostly sisters here, but I know they’ll appreciate a big, handsome guy like yourself.
No, I don’t think you’re weird. I have about the same number of shoes and try to take good care of them. I have a pair of 11-year old Bass loafers I got on my honeymoon that are my absolutely favorite pair of shoes [sub]and who cares about that little rip in the leather near the toe[/sub] and I refuse to throw them away. I polish them up regularly.
If I buy a new pair of good shoes (over $50, which is rare), I also make sure I have polish and waterproof spray and everything at home for them.
:sigh: I love shoes.
It’s not every man that can appreciate the…um…allure of a new pair of shoes!
First, a cheap pair of KMart no-name Blue Light specials.
Then the Hushpuppies.
Next thing you know, you’re hocking your kid’s TV set for a pair of Versaces.
But it’s never enough.
Deep in your soul, you know you’ll never be happy until you get a pair of Bruno Maglis. But even then, no matter how much you try to convince yourself, you know you’ll want the next season’s styles.
And you still get bring yourself to get rid of those cheap KMart shoes, even though the heel is worn to the outside and the toes have that permanent crease that looks like a horse stepped on you.
It’s never, ever enough.
I feel for you. And the pain of finding the first scratch on your Doc Martins never, ever goes away.
This is probably not a good time to tell you that one of our office tenants is a shoe distributor. I am cleaning all the offices this week (janitor is on vacation), and I get to go in and dust the boxes and the samples. SHiny bits of leather and velvety suede. Mmmmmmmmmmmm.
Florsheims, Cohn Turner, Oak Hall…sigh…idly running my fingers over the laces, caressing the tongues, teasing the instep. Wouldn’t you like to be here right now, just you…and me…and all these shoes…
Oh, and then there’s the boxes and the dessicants…
At first I was going to suggest obsessive compulsive disorder, but I reflected further and arrived at fetishist… just then I remembered something: Freud always believed shoes symbolized the female genitals. My diagnosis is now sex obsession with lack of sufficient outlet. Keep polishing those shoes….
I own a pair of sneaks, 2 pairs of boat shoes, 3 pairs of SAS loafers, 2 pairs of dress pumps, 2 pairs of sandals, and a ratty pair of slip-ons for cutting the grass. I think we have some black and brown shoe polish somewhere in the house. To me, bliss is my terrycloth house slippers…
Well, I’m at work and not wearing my shoes at the moment.
I have a very big thing for boots. Always have and don’t really care why. Boots and platforms. Anything that adds a few inches and looks kickass. My best pair of boots is a set of 20-eye Doc Martins [which recently had three eyelets ripped when the lace caught on a nail and tripped me]. These babies come up to my knees, covering my calves with shiny, smooth, lustrous, black leather. I keep them purdy by using very creamy black polish and a super-soft chamois. All this is coated with a leather balm that waterproofs and moisturizes [yeah, contradictory, I know] the leather to keep it soft.
Uncle, everyone I know that actually polishes their shoes, removes the laces. But do they all wash the laces? That’s where alot of dirt comes from. I have to wash them and then every pair of lace-up shoes I own is laced up the exact same way: the left is a mirror image of the right.
I don’t think you have to worry about Imelda Marcos until you have a million shoes you’ve never worn or seen and can’t remember buying.
Go to it, my man. You sound like me. Do you have shoe trees? They’re a must.
Off the top of my head:
One pair of Cole Hahn black loafers
One pair of Cole Hahn tan loafers (my favorites)
One pair of Bostonian black cap toed oxfords
Three pair (!?) of black tassel loafers
One pair of white suede bucks (looks great with a seersucker suit for a summer wedding - got the chalk bag to touch 'em up and everything)
One pair of suede oxfords
One pair of Brooks running shoes
One pair of Nike tennis shoes
One pair of Wolverine work boots
One pair of Tony Lamas boots (I have no idea why)
Never wear the same pair two days in a row, use shoe trees, if you heat the polish it’ll go on smoother, and always untie your shoes before you take them off.
When I moved down South, my shoes were confiscated at the border.
I’m not a shoe freak. I have a couple pairs of sneakers, a pair of good hiking boots for actual hiking, and my very comfortable LL Bean day-hikers. (I bought them up in Maine 10 years ago, and I still wear 'em.) I never wear shoes in the house, so my footwear gets to air out most of the time, and my carpets are nice and clean, too. I have dress shoes, but I hardly ever wear them.
All this shoe talk reminds me of how I used to annoy my father when I was a kid (ok, one of the ways). I never untied my shoes, and I would just step into them, jamming my feet down until the backs of the shoes popped back up. “You’re going to ruin your shoes that way!!!”. I still do it.
Same here. I have a pair of Dr. Martens, and as weird as it sounds, I polish them at least once a week and once a month I use special leather waterproof stuff. I always have to take very very good care of my shoes because they are hard to find in my size (womens 11/12) and often have to resort to buying men’s sneakers and such. Don’t even get me started on the joys of buying dressy shoes. I guess my obsession is from both my parents - my mom was a shoe addict and my dad had countless dress shoes for work that he always was polishing and taking to be resoled even if they really didn’t need it.
Shoes I Own -
-Black Dr. Martens with thick, almost platform sole but its very worn. I should probebly get them resoled soon…
-Suede Birkenstocks. Yes they’re hippie-ish, but they’re comfy!
-Tevas. Essential. Period.
-Black high heel leather boots. I love these boots more than anything. After each wear, they get cleaned with special leather lotion and always stay in the orginal box when not in use.
-Brown chunky heel boots. My second favorite.
-White leather, wood heel contour sandals with 4 inch heel. I love these, since they make my legs look longer and my feet look smaller.
-Black microfiber loafers with squishy sole. Goes with everything.
-My nike sneakers that I have had for way too long but can’t bear to part with them.
-My latest purchase, adidas superstar SFX sneakers with navy blue shiny stripes (I wanted the baby blue but they dont make them in my size and after hours of searching online I couldn’t find them. Oh well.)
-Assorted cheap dress meme-eque strappy sandals that I only wore to one event.
I find myself needing more and more pairs of shoes lately.
1 pair black leather dress
1 pair brown leather dress/casual
1 pair sport hikers for everyday use
1 pair rock climbing shoes
1 pair wrestling shoes (work great for Kung Fu)
1 pair winter boots
2 pair leftover sport hikers (for mucking around, fishing, anything dirty)
Well, if everyone is listing shoes, I suppose I probably should:[ul]
[li]2 pairs of Bass loafers, different styles[/li][li]1 pair of red Bass cowboy boots, square-toed with pony-skin top and leather botton. Cool![/li][li]1 pair of Bass greek-style sandals[/li][li]2 pair of ASICS running shoes: this year’s current pair and last years to kick around in[/li][li]3 pairs of black heels for dress-up/on-the-town/domination [sub]joking![/sub][/li][li]1 pair each heels: brown, white[/li][li]1 pair black loafers with rubber sole[/li][li]1 pair blue strappy sandals for summer weddings[/li][li]Misc. pairs of white canvas type loafers/shoes for summer[/li][li]1 pair red fabric chunky loafers with black sole[/li][li]1 pair Naturalizer red strappy sandals with 2" heel (very cool, very comfortable)[/li][li]1 pair leather work boots[/li][li]1 pair of Bass lace-up boots (to wear with jeans or denim dresses)[/li][li]1 very cheap pair of blue fabric thong sandals that I kept falling out of at Dopapalooza[/li][li]1 pair cream satin, beaded mules for Super Dress Up[/ul][/li]I’m sure I’m missing some. I have a weakness: red shoes. I almost don’t care what they look like, I just love red. Also, Bass shoes kick butt. I would, however, LOVE to be able to have a pair of Cole-Hahn loafers some day. plnnr, I’m jealous!
There’s a Cole Hahn outlet about 30 minutes from my house. I go down there every now and again and just sit in the store. That smell is just so…so…leathery. The shoes are so incredibly soft and, well, buttery (for lack of a better term). Worth the arm and a leg you have to pay for them (of course, if you take care of them they’ll last forever).
My favorite shoes, however, are the pair of black, patent leather, thigh high stilletto heeled boots that a certain woman I know has. When the boots come out - all bets are off. WHEW! Cole Hahn don’t make no shoes like them there boots.
Too many pairs of hiking boots, and all of them have had new heels put on:
Black leather Timberlands
Brown Nubuck Merrills
Suede Salomon X-Hikers
Two pairs of Vasque low-cut suede hikers
One pair of leather Technicas
One pair of Docs: 12-holes, steel toes, in black
Merrill Sport Sandals
Merrill Jungle Mocs, the suede slip-ons
Sandshooz - Australian Skate-Punk shoes for casual wear
A pair of black leather cap-toes for formal stuff