My mother saw this personal ad in our local paper and laughed so hard that she called and told me to look it up. Knowing immediately it was worth a SDMB thread, I present it here in its entirety:
**LET'S HANG OUT**
“SBF, 18, mother of 3 [empahsis mine], shy. ISO SBM, 20-25, likes movies and just hanging out. Ad # -------”
Huh. With three kids by age 18, you don’t seem too shy to me, honey. Maybe you need a little less “hanging out”, hmm?
Of course, this makes my sig below incredibly ironic.
Ok, I’ll just offer the possibility that she may have had a “one-time-but-I-really-regret-it” romp with a boyfriend that left her pregnant with triplets.
Ummm… is it me or is it you making major assumptions here? She’s single, black, female and 18… does this automatically make her some sort of slut because she has three children? Maybe she IS shy. For all you or anyone else knows, her husband could have died. I honestly think you are mocking someone that for all you know has no right to be mocked.
Take your prejudice in check folks. Sometimes, a husband or wife dies young. I think it’s very nasty to make this very rash, very hurtful assumption. For all we know she could be a wonderful mother to her children that were conceived young and she IS still shy.
I’m sure you didn’t mean anything hateful, Lizard, but take a step back, put yourself in her shoes and take a hard cold gander; you don’t really know what her life is like… okay? Just because she had three children doesn’t mean she’s “nailing her crotch to the wall for all comers”.
Well one things for sure. It definitely makes her female. As far as I know, no man has yet managed the feat of giving birth to three children. And as for her race goes, it makes no diference at all to the underlying humor in this.
Ah Byzantine, you just couldn’t resist, could you?
And for all you know, she’s never been married at all. Think about this: unless those kids were triplets (and as **JavaMaven{/b] said, what are the odds of that?) she had her first at around fifteen. Is that young enough to get married ANYWHERE? I know damn well it isn’t in MY state, or in any state that borders us.
I took a cold, hard gander, and it was profoundly uncomfortable. Next time I’ll take it somewhere else. But for now I’ll just say this:
-How many 15-year-olds have a kid…and then have two more as fast as is humanly possible? (The shortest time frame a woman could possibly have three kids in is about 30 months, assuming a month between each pregnancy.)
-How many women manage this feat while being married, OUTSIDE some place where the age of consent is incredibly low?
-How many American women manage this w/o having some major eyebrows raised as to either their 1-moral terpitude, or 2-intelligence or lack of same for not using birth control? (Which is what this thread is about)
andygirl, I know someone like that too. Coincidentally, she was from West Virginia, a place about which rumors of this sort of thing abound in my neck of the woods. And Byzantine? She was white.
Furthering that thought, does she really need a personal ad? She does not appear to have any problem getting dates.
Assuming of course there are not unusual circumstances that caused her present state, like she got married on her 18th birthday and became pregnant with triplets on her wedding night and her husband died and now she is a couple weeks away from turning 19. That would just be tragic and not funny.
I’m not certain but I seem to recall hearing about being able to marry at age 14 with a parents or guardians permission here in Canada. Don’t quote me on that though because I’m not certain.
An old friend of mine got married in a civil ceremony at 17 (New York State, 1988) and she needed her parents’ permission, but I’m not sure what the absolute minimum age here is. I want to say 16, based on a vague memory of a neighbor’s daughter getting hitched on her 16th birthday many years ago.
What diff. does it make if she was married? Does it make her sexually promiscuous if she was single when she got pregnant? Does it make her modest (for lack of a better word) if she was married when she had the kids? I don’t see why having a husband is all so important…
Huh. I guess I can’t figure out why her being black makes any difference at all, Byz. Is being black an excuse for being irresponsible? Every black person I know would be offended at that.
Eh, never mind. I see you were more questioning whether that was an underlying assumption within the OP than making excuses. Although, when I first read the OP, I though the B stood for bisexual. Shows how much I read the personals.
pray tell why my phone number was in your paper?!?!
I’d agree though, seriously… I actually overheard some kids at school today saying "yea man, this is what you do. if you fuck a girl, and she says, “OMG, you didn’t wear a condom?!?” laugh and say “hey babe, you didn’t remind me”
I feel that this is both pathetic, and irresponsible. remember now, I’m a SOPHOMORE, and kids my age are dropping left and right outta school because of pregnancy. now you also gotta factor in, we are one of the biggest (13th, unlucky number right there) schools in MN, and we (our county) also have one of the highest Teen Alcoholic rates, and Suicide rates in the COUNTRY… statisitically speaking, of course, so in other words… our county is full of pregnant suicidal dropouts… nice to live up to, eh? (at least the standards are easy to supercede.
on the OTHER hand though, our county also ranks in the top ten for SAT’s, ACT’s, and Standards tests in the US… we are Fucked up.
I knew quite a few teen mothers when I was in high school, and most of them really were quite shy. A shy girl is just as likely to get pregnant as one who isn’t – perhaps even more likely if she is too shy to refuse to sleep with her boyfriend, or ask him to wear a condom, or go ask her doctor for birth control pills.
