Holy crap. I JUST did this tonight, not twenty minutes ago. Well, it was hot chocolate, not coffee, but the effects (ouch) are essentially the same. I’m not normally stupid, though, so I ask you to please consider my record before condemning me.
If you just take the “Nawth” out of there it’d be interesting… :eek:
I just want to know what its like to be able to dispel/turn Goths. Trust me, there’s a real market for you in the workplace if you can:
“This cubicle-farm is… Clean…!”
“You sent them to another plane of existance?”
“Yes.”
“Hell…?”
“No. Seattle…” 
They do make planes in Seattle, right?
Hey, Bobo, can I smite people? I have a list.
:eek: :eek: Uh oh! That doesn’t bode well… What happened?! 
:eek:
You may smite people, I don’t know if you can or not.
Smiting is so old testament, I’m waiting for the power to unmake. Imagine growling out in a menacing voice, quiet but still loud enough to be heard by all (with just the faintest echo) “I will unmake you” MWA HA HA cough HA HA HAAAA!
Sorry, what was the question?
I’m also ordained with the Universal Life Church. I did it on a whim since it is free. When I told my dad he asked me for a link so he can annoy his religious sister. I think that the certificate says I can absolve people’s sins so we’re pretty good to go here. At work, I’ve blessed the water cooler and the coffee pot.
I thought about being registered to actually perform weddings but that seems too much like real work to me.
Whether or not you have to register depends on the laws of the state in which you’re officiating, if I understand the website correctly.
Zabali, life happened; now that I’m ordained, though, I have recourse against it!! 
Me - “Hey, gas prices jumped a quarter overnight!”
Rich Jackass @ the Oil Co. - “So, what’re you gonna do about it?”
And the brimstone begins…
Yep. I’m in Illinois, so all I have to do is exist (and have that Certificate of Ordination). I did email the Cook County Clerk’s office to be sure, and they acted all confused about the question. :smack:
Did you phrase it in proper Chicagoan?
“Hey, dere, I need ta letcha know dat I’m, uh, gonna do some weddings dere, afta which wull go fuh beers. Oh, yah, you betcha!”
I was with you until the last sentence, and then you started talking Minnesotan, but I’m not bilingual.
No, actually I said something like, “I’m a recently ordained minister. I am writing to find out if there is any registration, licensing or other form I need to fill out before performing a marriage in Cook County or the State of Illinois.” And “they” wrote back something like: “If you want a marriage license, you can pick one up at the local office.” And I wrote back, “No, I want to perform legal marriages, not get married. Is there anything I need to do first?” And they said something else stupid and irrelevant and I took a large axe down to the Clerk’s office and reprogrammed their email response computer with it.
No wait, I mean, I gave up. That’s what I did. I comforted myself with the information off several other websites, and left it at that. So there may be a few couples in Illinois living in sin if I have that wrong…
I assume you signed the marriage licence, right? So, unless someone has some grounds somewhere down the line to challenge your right to marry the couples…you’re golden, no?
(I bet the county’s computer has a sign on the front that says, “Share and Enjoy!”)
(hijack)
You know, I am beginning to suspect that you are actually me. What with the threads on paganism, being ordained, herbs, being in the Chicago area and so forth… are you sure we haven’t met??
Just yesterday I got the inkling that you were one of my friends I haven’t seen in a while. But I’m pretty sure she likes Indian food a whole lot, so now I’m perplummoxed again. But if we don’t know each other, maybe we should!
But she lives in your town, is a vegetarian, herbalist, dances with pagans (although I think she’s a Buddhist - or she follows the Red Path, I’m not sure which) and is one of the nicest people in the known universe…so maybe it’s *she *you should be meeting!
I was at the Courthouse anyhow so I wandered down to the Clerk’s office and asked. They gave me a bunch of forms which are in my office desk somewhere.
Update!
Working on an HR project this week, I had to go through everyone’s resume’ and transfer info from hard copy to an online form. I ran across one of my co-workers who had put under Education a Doctorate in Divinity from the ULC! On further inspection of her file, I saw that during the background check the company did, it was only able to confirm that she had Minister’s credentials (as we all have at the ULC). I couldn’t believe the cheek of it! Other things in her file point to a lack of trustworthiness for this person, so I shall watch my step.
Renton and Everett actually. Another ULC minister licensed to perform weddings. I have done only 2. The first was for a young couple that could not afford a minister, I did that one gratis. The second was an older couple, he was Mexican and knew very little English, the bride picked a very long winded set of vows from the internet and it took twice as long because the groom’s brother had to interpret everything. I ran into the bride a few months later and her hubby had been deported back to Mexico. She didn’t seem to upset about it though.
Help me out here, is the ULC a real religion? I thought it was just some website that would ordain anybody who asked? Do they actually have real beliefs and congregations and stuff like that?
Well, you have to help me out, first. What’s a “real religion”? 
They do have church services, every Sunday at 10 am, according to their website. There are ULC congregations all over the world who meet for religious services, although more people hold Ordinations than attend their services, I expect. As they say on their website, the common thread uniting their congregations (and online ordination services) are a belief in religious freedom.
This page, from another church which does online ordinations, has a good explanation of why it is legal and appropriate in the US to offer Ordination with no seminary training or other requirements:
As long as a church is legally incorporated and files with the IRS (and to do so, it has to meet the criteria laid out very nicely on this Universal Ministries page), then the church is a legally operating church and the government cannot legally tell them what education, duties or beliefs their ministers need to fulfill.
So, religiously, how do they justify it? It varies by church, of course. I chose UM because I liked their take on it:
Being called to be a minister is a matter between God and the one so called. No man (or woman) has the right to say a Calling is false. At the time I applied, there was even a bit about how even those seeking Ordination as a joke were serving their Higher Selves and/or God/ess/es in their own way, and that there is sacred wisdom in humor. (I’m totally paraphrasing, because I can’t find that bit right now, if it’s still there.)