That's Reverend Nawth Chucka to you!

I really enjoyed having my own business, back when I cleaned houses and helped nice older people around their houses with parties and recitals and such. Then, I was forced back into the workaday world, where I needed to care about what others told me to do, which blew like a five-dollar whore.
I let my mind wander on the very long trip back from the holidays, thinking about what I enjoy doing that could be done for a living; then it struck me!
I like unique weddings, they are fun to attend and a blast to plan and the avalanche of my thoughts went from there. It struck me that it would be fun to help people carry out their own unique weddings, but not as a wedding planner (which one can get married w/o), but rather as an all-important officiant.
So, I went to the site for the Universal Life Church and officially joined their Christian sect. I am ordained for the purposes of officiating at all kinds of things and even starting my own church if I like.
What shall I call my hitching business? God’s Hired Gun? Off With A Hitch? Still Better Than The JOP?
I think there are other ordained Dopers, n’est pas?

Congrats on the mail-order credential. I take it from your duplicate thread that you’re “born again” in your faith? :smiley:

If you really want to offer your customers a full range of options, you might consider working up an Elvis-impersonator act.

I think we’ve got everything from Ásatrúar to Zoroastrians here, though I’m not sure how many are their equivalent of ordained. I’m 99% certain there has been at least one other ULC member, though maybe not recently.

:: ponders name of Nawth Chucka’s proposed business ::

Lord (or Lady, depending) of the Rings?
By These Words?
Knotty Business? :smiley:

And why limit it to Christians? If your clients are designing their own weddings, from your viewpoint does it matter which Deity is observing?

re. your incorporate name, how about “No Justice, No Peace”?

I’ve officiated at a few weddings - it can be a lot of fun or a real pain but it’s never dull! I have a buddy that does sound, video, and DJ’s the reception and he has a couple of photographer friends. Works out fairly well.

Reverend Bobo

To clarify, I am a female. I just checked a little while ago.
I’m a bit slight to pull off Elvis. Maybe Amy Grant impersonating would be more realistic, but likely less marketable.
I didn’t see the duplicate thread but I guess that means a mod ate it, hurrah! I’m working on a different computer than usual, that’s my story, etc…
**I ** am limited to the Christian sect I’m ordained in, but I’m more than happy to recite words favorable to Ganesh, or Shiva, or Buddha, whatever the nice couple gives me to read aloud. Heck, I’ll do it in a language I don’t know, so long as it’s spelled out phonetically.
Bobo, any pitfalls I should expect?

Thanks for all the great name ideas, keep 'em coming!

Brides are flaky, weddings take about three times longer than you expect, it’s a part-time gig (I’ve never had a Wednesday afternoon wedding), couples generally have no idea what they want except maybe “You know, the basic wedding thing, with the rings and the ‘I do’” so have a half-dozen variations of the ceremony in advance so that you have a plan in advance when you meet with them.

I assume you’re comfortable with talking in front of groups? Prepared to ad-lib if a sudden storm strikes an outdoor wedding or the power blows and you lose amplification/lighting…

That’s all I’ve had to deal with, nothing too bad.

I’ve officiated at two weddings with my ULC credential. One was for a good friend and his wife which was why I got ordained in the first place.

The second was spur of the moment. My step-cousin was going to get married in a couple of months. His fiancee got pregnant a little earlier than anticipated so I married them right after they found out so that she could get on his medical insurance. They had the big, fancy, real wedding as scheduled but only a few of us knew that the legal wedding had already happened.

Gotta watch out with ULC. Not *for *ULC, but for cities, counties or states which are (unconstitutionally, I believe) not accepting their ordination as basis for performing weddings. Last I heard, NY was not allowing ULC ministered weddings, but they were fighting it pretty hard. Always check with the county clerk’s office in the town where you will be performing the wedding.

WhyNot,
Ordained, Universal Ministries*
*another insta-ordination via website; nothing fancy, but less well known than ULC

Welcome to the ULC crew. I’ve been ordained for several years now.

I respectully request that you ordain me to go unto a Crusade to rid the world of stupid people, who deserve it: as in those that spill hot coffee on their own lap, or shoot their neighbor’s pets.

Please Reverend, give me this task, and I will grant thee souls to commit to Heaven. Or Hell. Or Staten Island if Thee Shall deem Fit.

Tripler
Punctuation intended.

NC, are you legally registered with your state to be able to officiate at weddings? Different states have different requirements to meet, I know this because a friend of ours is an ordained non-denominational minister and was talking about the differences between Oklahoma and Kansas when it was time for him to renew his legal registration. You might look into that, otherwise you might have disappointed couples who thought you were legally marrying them. Or, be sure to point out to them that you aren’t legally marrying them, (if you can’t) that they need to visit a JOP to get that done? I know some couples have two weddings, a JOP wedding, and a church ceremony for their family…so maybe?
I figure you probably are able to legally marry people, but felt it better to be safe than sorry so mentioned it. In any case, good luck and I hope you have fun. :slight_smile:

Can I call you Father Nawth Chucka? Mother Nawth Chucka brings me back to the nuns at school and while they were definitely nowhere as weird as the nuns usually depicted in movies, it still wasn’t much of a happy time…

I thought the ULC did not limit its members?

If anyone gives you the following text, “Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!”, do not attempt to say it.

I’ve been ordained for six years. Christ or Christianity was never mentioned.

The coolest part is the total absolution for all sins up to the moment of ordination.

That explains the Salvation Army Elivs impersonator ringing bells/collecting at the mall last Christmas.

Yeah, I don’t *feel * any different, but the Holy Glow kept me up all damn night! I noticed more ‘thou’ and ‘thee’ in my speech as well today, but I’m in middle Georgia so no one noticed me talking funny. :smiley:
Brides can be flaky, eh? I sure expect that. I’m very comfortable talking in front of groups, yep yep yep. I’ll be one of those officiants you have to hand a glass of wine to shut up.
I’ll be asking my nicely-built S.O. to be the handy bouncer guy who shushes those who speak rather than holding their peace at the all-important juncture.
Now that I think about it, what **would ** be the popularity of an Amy Grant impersonator marrying people?
Should I expect people to invite me to the reception after officiating?

Don’t expect it, as in, show up without being expressly asked by the bride, groom, or person paying for the receptions, but accept/decline graciously as you feel moved to. I’ve always been asked to attend, but that’s probably because I’ve known everyone I married!

If you don’t want to stay, just thank them ever so much and apologize that you have another appointment to keep.

I’ve always been. Occasionally invited to the rehearsal dinner as well, but I generally decline. God forbid someone ask me to say grace or blessing or whatever it’s called before they eat.

Got any horror stories?