The Adventures of Amazing Magic-Gro Muteboy

I’ve got a miserable case of laryngitis and for the past two weeks haven’t been able to produce anything more than sad croaking noises. To communicate I’ve been forced to carry a little notepad around to write things down. I’ve had a few really odd experiences because of this.

Last night at Wal-Mart I was looking for one of those little lamps that clip onto things. I walk up to the middle-age fella behind the help desk, hold up my little pad on which I’ve drawn a decent little representation of said lamp and the phrase “Hi. Where could I find these?”. He asks me for my pad, which I hand to him, and he writes down “You might try housewares in the back”. I rolled my eyes.

I’m at a restaraunt ordering lunch, the waitress asks me if I’m ready to order. I nod “yes” and hold up my pad with my order written on it.

“CAN… I… GET… YOU… SOMETHING… TO… DRINK…”.

(groan).

I . . .KNOW . . … WHAT . . . YOU . . MEAN . . . I . . . HAD . . . THROAT . . . .SURGERY . . . NOT . . . .LONG . . . AGO

PEOPLE. . . CAN. . . BE. . . IDIOTS.

present company included sometimes.

Any chance that these people thought you were deaf, and were trying to be helpful?

Well the genius at Wal-Mart asked me for the pad then he wrote the “You might try housewares”. I thought that was pretty funny.

Oh, OK. I figured they might have taken you for what used to be called a “deaf-mute.” But the chance exists, of course, that they were just trying to be “funny.”

P.S. Hope your yeller gets better soon!