It’s one thing for a thread to die because they hate you.
It’s another for a thread to die because nobody gives a rat’s patoot.
What we need is a reference library.
Hi, my name is Buddy, and I look forward to some day being an AJP. I’m still in training mode now, posting in IMHO because MPSIMS is still too good for me. I can answer questions about my favorite movie or book. My answers aren’t exciting or enlightening though. ‘Just the facts’, that seems to be my unfortunate motto. I started a thread or two. No one liked them. I wanted to cry. But I’m trying, and I think that with hard work and effort, I’m well on my way to posting mediocrity!!
P.S. I apologize for those who took the time to read this post. Just think, those seconds could have been spent talking to your parents or children, doing a few push-ups, or educating yourself through Cecil’s brilliance. But you wasted it on me. I’m scum. I’m sorry. Please go on with your day.
Hi there, newbies & lurkers! Welcome! Really!
I sense something in the newbie posts here, something akin to fear. Listen–you guys don’t suck, okay? You just have low post counts. Trust me, we’ve all had low post counts. We’ve worked very, very hard to achieve this level of averageness, and you can do it too! Of course, it involves long hours, no pay (not cash money, anyway), headaches, eye strain, and many occasions of telling yourself “Geez Louise, I really need to clean my house/feed my kids/take a shower/eat for the first time in three days,” but trust me…it is sooooo worth it!
Jump right in! Be average! MPSIMS isn’t the busiest forum on the SDMB for nothing! Make your two cents count!
(okay, so our collective two cents doesn’t actually count for anything. But sometimes, somebody will think that something you say is really funny, and that’s very cool.)
Yeah. Average. shrug
Persephone said:
Hey, what’s wrong with vanilla? I like vanilla. Vanilla is my favorite…oh…never mind…
Is it just me, or do some of the folks here with us real Average Joe/Jane Posters resemble Bill Gates attending a barbeque and claiming to be one of the little guys?
I just didn’t think it would be fair for this thread to fall into the abyss. Sorry.
All you esteemed average people are gods to me. I am worse than average. I suggested a thread topic once only to have the person starting it say “I don’t remember who suggested this idea”. My only claim to fame is one time I made the mistake of letting a few details about my miserable real-life existance creep into a thread topic and it grew into first a horrible flame in the pit and then the subject of one of the most successful “group bonding at the sake of a stupid smuck” threads ever on the board. I actually feel a more miserable human being since posting on this board than before but since I have absolutely no friends and real-life this is as good as it gets. All you average Joes are my heros. Maybe someday I will be as good as you.
Hmmmm…
I’ve been here for a year and a half and haven’t broken four digits yet.
I actually left the country, posting very rarely, for almost two months, and as far as I know nobody has noticed either my departure or my return. I’ve been meaning to write a travelogue / magnum opus and post it, but I’m 99% sure nobody would be interested.
I used to think I had expert knowledge on a few subjects, but every time I’ve tried to show it off I’ve gotten something horribly wrong. Nobody, to my knowledge, has ever asked a question about Shakespeare’s Henry VI plays, the one subject about which I do unequivocally have some measure of expertise. I’m pretty sure nobody ever will.
I have never been in a flame war, not even one.
I have introduced at least two new posters to TSD, but one of them only posted five times and the other one won’t tell me his screen name, so I don’t know if he’s a welcome addition or not.
Yep, I think this makes me yet another Jane Average. Glad there’s finally a place for us.
Hmm 87 posts in this thread now. I think that anyone who starts a thread that gets that long is immediatly kicked out of the average poster club.
Is horrible spelling one of the criteria for joining the club? If so I’m a shoe-in.
I am average. Normal. Boring.
I kill threads, get ignored in GD, GQ, AND the pit.
I said “felch” in the pit. Once. It sounded stupid. Heck, I barely cuss in the pit.
People don’t seem to need to know what I look like.
I’m stopping before I get too depressed.
I am plain. I am painfully average. Here I am.
Average Jane Poster #68 at your service.
I am a Joe-Poster… for the time being.
That’s because I’m new. As a new guy, I try to keep my posts as boring and non-thought-provoking as possible. However, my time will come. As my number of posts increases, everyone will have to realize that I am here to be the greatest poster in the history of all message boards on the Internet. After, they will all feel my wrath and cutting wit as I pulverize some unsuspecting trolls in the pit. Oh, yeah. My time will come, and when it does, you won’t know what hit you!!! MWAAAAH HA HA HA…
Oooops. Me’s got meself carried away again.
Anyway, I’ve got the looks, I’ve got the charismatic username, the World is my oyster baybee!!!
Well, as I definitely qualify as an Average Jane Poster, and since I am willing to give back rubs, can I join?
Pleeeease?
Scotti
See, I killed the thread, so i am like SOOOOOOOO qualified.
Please put me out of my misery and accept me?
Scotti
plops down on the couch
I like to talk about how I like to drink beer and watch the simpsons. Thats about the extent of it.
I’m on no lists… laminated or not… never been to a dopers anything. Never had an email discussion with anyone from here… went into the chat once after wally died. Thats it.
I dont think ive ever even read a great debate thread much less posted to one. Almost never venture into the pit. Only go to GQ to ASK questions…
I like to naval gaze… so sue me.
I’m in as an Average Jane Poster. Consider this.
-Registered over a year ago, and still trying to hit 200 posts.
-The only thread that I have started that got more than 10 replies is “Who’s the most mundane U.S. President?”
-I’m scared of the Pit.
-Dammit, what’s wrong with a vanilla milkshake?
-I go to answer “What’s your favorite…?” posts, and then realize that all mine have been taken, so what’s the point anyway?
My vote for the motto goes to the one about stabilizing the bell curve or the one about ice cream.
As for an official Average sports team, I vote for the Detroit Tigers. Like them, we don’t hit winning dirt that often, but when we do, others look at us and say, “What the heck was that, and who posted it???” in a befuddled, yet amused, manner.
I’m so average that I haven’t even broke 200 posts yet and I’ve been registered since April of 1999 or so.
I’ve made a few crush lists, which is my only claim to fame.
I have started only one thread, in GQ, about asbestos. Oooo…big deal, huh?
Well, I’m just gonna sit in this corner wearing my offwhite tshirt and tan pants and knit some biege wool sweaters for us once this room gets too cold. I can’t knit though so bear with me.
Well, I think I qualify.
I tried introducing witty repartee in a thread after ChiefScott and Falcon started flirting - and neither were ever heard from (in that thread) again. Apparently it wasn’t very witty.
I have contributed to a few threads in GQ, but they go away quickly.
I flirt really badly, and no one has ever responded.
I am still learning the rules.
I have a really lame user name. If people don’t forget it immediately, they want to.
I have never posted in the Pit, and certainly have never been mentioned there that I know of.
The one “just for fun” thread I was involved in here in MPSIMS died just as I thought it was getting interesting.
Oh, and brachy… (if you think I am going to spell that whole name, think again) I myself am partial to Chi-square distributions. Does that make us compatible? (See what I mean about flirting badly. Who on earth flirts with statistics?)
Finally, a true home for me. I’m not only resoundingly average, I’m bland. Fairly high post count, but betcha nobody can remember a single one. No particular talents or skills. I’ve started a few threads, but they promptly sank like rocks.
In large groups (or even small ones) I hug the walls, where I blend right into the wallpaper. Absolute true fact: I’m posting this in between switching loads of laundry from washer to dryer. Of course this is after I watered my houseplants and cleaned the kitchen.
If anyone is still awake, can I be please hang around you guys? I’ll bring chip dip. (Lipton’s Onion soup mix in sour cream.)
Veb