I long to see the secret forums. I really do.
Alas, I probably never will.
<sigh>
There is a Moderator only forum, so that they may discuss policy, offending posts, and hardcore chimpanzee clown porn.
How else would Coldfire get so many posts?
A series of dykes and levees that expose previously flooded posts lurking below sea-level?
(See, 'cause he’s Dutch and they – oh fuck it.)
::sigh::
Yes, there is ONE moderator only forum. Do you REALLY want to know what’s in it? That’s where we move all the “Make Money Fast” posts, assorted other spams, really vile posts, and notes about who was warned, what they were warned about, and what thread they were warned in. It’s also where we make note of who was banned and for what reason.
Here’s a typical post, made by yours truly, in the Banned thread:
Here’s a typical post made by someone else in the Warning thread:
There, isn’t that EXCITING? We don’t even discuss who’s ahead in the Mod Pit Thread contest. We save that for email. The only reason we use the mod forum to archive this information is because it’s easier to find the information than rooting around in our various email files. Truly, it’s the most boring forum on the board.
Our emails, however, are chock full of humor sometimes. At other times we just send out a note saying “I’m gonna be on vacation/moving/whatever from <date 1> to <date 2>. Please cover <my forum>.”
Coming this fall: Please Cover My Forum, the new situation comedy about message board moderators and their duels with the evil Herr Konkrete. 
[sub]Please don’t kill me Lynn.[/sub]
Michael Ellis, please report to my Lair.
:eek:
Well, now I’ve seen Coldfire in a kilt and heard his incredibly sexy voice on Francesca’s site (deep, masculine voices are a major turn-on that make me go all Jamie Lee Curtis in “A Fish Called Wanda” when John Cleese speaks Russian).
So, does his girlfriend get jealous?
I hope not! (mmmmm…)
Give us this day our morning wood.
Re: The board makes me angry
This board actually makes me angry and hungry, plus one other thing that I don’t like to talk about.
Alright…a show of hands: who has ever been called on their post content BY A MOD? I may have pissed off a member or two, but I’ve never been reprimanded by " da man". Anyone? Anyone? Buehler?
Well, that’s one way to plug thehole… and all these years I heard it was a finger that was used…
Kalhoun–I once got an email from TubaDiva with the subject of, “About that post of yours…” and I thought, oh, crap, what have I done now? Turns out she was greeting a fellow tuba player, which I had mentioned playing…
HAHAHAHAHA! This made me laugh out loud. Kudos. 
I can’t be the only one who saw this thread title and thought to myself:
“…these pretzels are making me thirsty!!”
Or can I?
No no no, you’re doing it all wrong. It’s “…these pretzels are making me thirsty!!”
Happy
I have a suggestion for Incubus:
Get a LiveJournal.
Did wonders for me. I’ll even give you a code.
Esprix
Oh, THAT’s what he was talking about. I thought it was just a cool Land of the Lost hallucination.
OK, just give me a nickel bag, then.
Most boards have mods only forums. It’s where they go to discuss their plans to take over the world.
D’uh.
Incubus–I enjoy www.somethingawful.com. It costs 9.95 to join the forums.
I am such a dork for paying to go on yet another forum, but it is worth it. There’s some priceless shit on there.