If he were stabbed, what do you think would come out of him?
Grease? Ketchup?
Special sauce?
That stuff they keep trying to get me to dip the onion rings in.
And demons. Definitely demons. Like that scene in Army of Darkness, where there are all the little versions of Ash running around.
If the Burger King empire things they can scare me into eating at their establishments with their creepy commercials, they are SADLY MISTAKEN!
The worst one for me was the one where they guy woke up and the Burger King was IN BED with him.
Holy crap.
Now I know exactly how to get my husband for Halloween.
(Those commercials scare the CRAP out of me. Especially the guy in the construction site, because we’d just finished watching something on the History Channel that showed the workers walking around the 102nd story of the Empire State Building on beams. I got nauseous just looking at it.)
E.
You wanna know my response to the Burger King?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGGH!!
Kind of like that one episode of the Simpsons.
In Tennessee, there is a BK ad featuring a lumberjack with a chainsaw.
He cuts down a tree, & there the Nightmare King stands, baring his twists grin & holding our his “food”.
Were I the woodsman, I’d take that chainsaw, & make the world a better place.
All the King commercials have made me laugh so far. Of course, I was also a big fan of the Spongmonkeys.
HELP
“Wake up with the King!”
Add me to the list of blokes with wives who think The King is creepier than a can o’ millipedes.
Me? I love the big goofy sonuvabitch. He’s the bastard love chile’ of Satan’s and Father Christmas’ Most Unnatural Act. He’s the most unintentionally disturbing thing I’ve seen coming out of the marketing world in quite some time, and I welcome his deranged visage warmly. It’s been too long. He makes that Quiznos baby look like Cupid.
A contender is “Bob” from those Enzyte (“for Natural Male Enhancement”) commercials. Bob’s psychotic grin, coupled with the fact you know he’s wandering around with a giant, throbbing erection the whole time, certainly has given me a shudder or two. But nobody comes close to The King’s paradoxical beneficent skeevyness. All hail!
That’s all marketing is these days: being remembered, and standing out from the great gelatinous blob that is mass communication these days. The honchos at BK have to be thrilled, because we’re talking about their company. Doesn’t really matter why or how.
(Well, I guess it does matter; we’re not saying, “So, did you hear, they found another baby’s deep-fried face in a sandwich, what is that, sixteen now?” But you get the idea.)
The first one where the guy wakes up with the drag queen still disturbs me. To make things worse the costume reminds me of a housewife in an old bathrobe, head wrapped in a bath towel, smoking a cig out the side of her mouth, after a night bar hopping, standing on the front step about to pick up the paper before she has her coffee. Shudder… All that in one breath too! Woho!
Just the other day my boyfriend and I were talking about a movie being creepy. I flipped on the TV just as the BK lumberjack commercial came on. About a split second after I said the word “creepy”, the tree falls and there’s the Burger King with his Sandwich O’ Death. We laughed about the coincidence, however maybe it wasn’t a coincidence and just saying the word “creepy” summons him, if that’s true everyone here is in for some trouble and possibly elevated cholesterol.
And now for something really disturbing…
King of the Uncanny Valley.
I wish they’d do one where the camera has the point of view of someone on the operating table. One by one members of the operating team pop into view, with the King the last to appear and wielding a scalpel.
HA!
Now that’s a good one…\
(O&^%$
hic
I guess I watch the wrong TV (sports & the Disaster channel mostly), but I’ve never seen one of these ads.
That…was…the most horrible thing…
You are a sick man. Sick and evil.