The Burger King Jesus of Minnesota

[CalMeacham]

Words fail me

Minnesota’s “The Coming King” isn’t as large as Ohio’s “King of Kings” (which was Touchdown Jesus’s official name), but what it lacks in scale it makes up for in testosterone. It depicts a battle-ready warrior Jesus, with bulging muscles and a sword raised for slashing. He sits bareback on a rearing white stallion, balanced on a boiling gray cloud, crimson cape flapping in the breeze, with a ram’s horn to sound the attack and a royal crown atop his disproportionately large head. It’s supposedly based on a couple of Bible verses (Revelation 19:11-12).

Jesus has come back from heaven — to raise hell.

The statue stands 18 feet tall outside of a megachurch that was formerly an aviation museum. In fact, Jesus’s current spot was previously occupied by a sculpture of three backflipping fighter jets.

The best part is this:

Snarky locals have already christened the new Christ “Hi-Ho Jesus” and “Burger King Jesus.”

Warrior Jesus on a white horse? WWJD?

End Times Jesus Draws Battle Line Along Interstate - Trunkations

[GameHat]

John 11:35

[Jenaroph]

The Passion of the Christ II: He’s back, and he’s PISSED!

[Hypno-Toad]

This is in Minnesota. Shouldn’t he be wearing a helmet with horns and holding a big hammer?

[tdn]

That’s Jesus? Shouldn’t it be Michael? Or Gabriel? Or maybe Aragorn?

[Hypno-Toad]

There also needs to be an opponent for him to fight. They should put up an opposing statue of the antichrist that looks exactly the same except that the antichrist has the alternate-universe-evil-twin goatee.

[Polycarp]

@Hypno-Toad

This is in Minnesota. Shouldn’t he be wearing a helmet with horns and holding a big hammer?

You’ll be thorry you thaid that!

Actually, the Man on Horseback (literally) syndrome was already quite well known when He was alive on Earth. Imperators in Rome were supposed to stage Triumphs – the English terms derive from the techical Latin ones. Alexander’s Successor king lines did likewise. And, presuming for the sake of the argument the historicity of the Palm Sunday “triumphal entry into Jerusalem,” the symbolism He chose could not have been more a contrast:

1As they approached Jerusalem and came to Bethphage on the Mount of Olives, Jesus sent two disciples, 2saying to them, “Go to the village ahead of you, and at once you will find a donkey tied there, with her colt by her. Untie them and bring them to me. 3If anyone says anything to you, tell him that the Lord needs them, and he will send them right away.”

4This took place to fulfill what was spoken through the prophet:
5"Say to the Daughter of Zion,
‘See, your king comes to you,
gentle and riding on a donkey,
on a colt, the foal of a donkey.’ " (Matthew 21:1-5, internally quoting Zechariah 9:9)

[Gyrate]

He writes, on his web site, that while sculpting the statue his own body, clothes, and bathroom became covered with “Glory Dust,” a miraculous substance that he notes is also mentioned in the Bible.

Soooo…while he was in the process of making a sculpture, large amounts of dust were generated? How could this have happened??? IT IS A MIRACLE!

[Gatopescado]

I wanna see the rest of this chess set!

[Annie]

He looks like he’s about to invade Russia. Good luck with that, dude.

[silenus]

Ummm…Annie? Looked at a map lately?

[Annie]

Alps, Russia, big piles of snow,Europe, whatever…

[Ludovic]

Due to it’s looking more Baroque than anything, it reminded me more of this guy as far as your generic leader-dude-on-a-horses goes.

[twickster]

@Annie

He looks like he’s about to invade Russia. Good luck with that, dude.

@silenus

Ummm…Annie? Looked at a map lately?

Duh, if Sarah Palin can see Russia from her house, surely Jesus can see Russia from Minnesota. :rolleyes:

[Polycarp]

I think it was more that when Napoleon crossed the Alps (as First Consul of the French Republic not yet as Emperor), it was to invade Italy, not Russia.

[Grumman]

He writes, on his web site, that while sculpting the statue his own body, clothes, and bathroom became covered with “Glory Dust,” a miraculous substance that he notes is also mentioned in the Bible.

Cocaine does not count!

[twickster]

@Polycarp

I think it was more that when Napoleon crossed the Alps (as First Consul of the French Republic not yet as Emperor), it was to invade Italy, not Russia.

:smack:

[Ike_Witt]

If I am reading the OP correctly, Jesus likes it bareback?

[Rysdad]

Great Leapin’ Lord on a Lipizzaner!

[gwendee]

If I drove past that every single day for the rest of my life but never read or heard anything about it I would never conclude that it was supposed to be Jesus.