And now you greedy bastards are hoarding that ill gotten name like a Mafia Don’s virgin daughter! 
I kid. I kid because I love.
I already have a down payment on Red Black tickets. I have a “F*** the Green Whites!” sign already planned out. 
Well, if Ottawa had supported their team the way Riders fans support theirs, you’d never have lost the name in the first place. 
Excuse me, I believe their name is REDBLACKS. I wish I was kidding.
And Montreal fans hate baseball, and there are more hockey fans in Dallas than in Minnesota, right? Bad ownership ruined the team, not the fan base.
I like saying “Les Rouges et noirs,” personally. Sounds better in my pigeon French!
Apparently they’ve been available for years, down east, but now the Holy Grail of fast food is available in Ontario (for a limited time):
Suck it, western provinces! 
OMG! That’s actually true. I was expecting an Onion link. What’s next, SNL’s McSushi?
Intellectually I know that McDonald’s wouldn’t come out with a food product that they couldn’t serve safely (the lawyers would kill em otherwise). But there’s a little voice in my head screaming ‘Are you seriously going to trust the guys working at MickyD’s to handle shellfish?!’
Eh, I’m not a fan of the seabugs. 
Isn’t red and black how you look if you have been beaten up?
No, we’d need a Canadian connection: McPoutine, McButtertart, McNanaimo Bar. Those might be interesting.
But I’d hate to see what McD’s produces if it ever introduces the McMontreal Smoked Meat Sandwich.
You can already by Dunn’s smoked meat in a bag at the Costco. It’s edible. I cast imagine McDonald’s would be too far off the mark.
I remember years ago when they made their “Deli style sandwiches,” I used to always get their Reuben before they stopped making it. That was a great sandwich, by McDonald’s standards.
But no matter how hard McD’s tried, I doubt that it would approach Schwartz’s or Ben’s. (I know Ben’s has closed, but I loved their smoked meat sandwiches.)
I appreciated their effort, but their Reuben was a pale comparison to what I could get at the Pickle Barrel in Toronto. Never mind the proper delis.
Toronto Dopers: is Shopsy’s still in business? How about Switzer’s on Spadina? And Yitz’s, on Eglinton at Avenue Road?
The main location of Shopsy’s at Yonge and Front closed years ago. They’re still around but it’s just not the same anywhere else. I don’t know the other two you mentioned but there’s still a Katz’s on Dufferin.
Yitz’s is still around.
As was mentioned above, the main Shopsy’s location closed, and the franchised version that is still around isn’t the same.
Don’t try to buy pot on Twitter. The York Regional Police are on there too:
That’s right up there in the Brilliant Moves category, along with putting an add in Craigslist to hire a hitman to “take care” of your husband.
Oh, and FYI McSpoons, they do sell poutine at some McDonald’s locations. There’s about three in Ottawa that do. But those thin fries suck for holding curds and gravy. Burger King’s poutine is way better.
Deliver the pot right to his work, eh? I’ve got to give him credit for big brass balls, anyway.
President’s Choice single serving heat in a bag Montreal Smoked Meat is tolerable (a lot better than Shopsy’s), provided it is slowly and gently warmed. PC Optimum
Moe Pancer’s deli on Bathurst north of the highway is still making the world a better place. http://www.moepancersdeli.ca/pdf/PancersMN_2012.pdf
I once spent the summer driving about North America in a quest for the best smoked meat sandwich (ostensibly the funding was to moderate and speak at an STC conference, but hey, we all have priorities). Quite simply, all others paled in comparison to Schwartz’s. http://schwartzsdeli.com/ca/en/
I would never have been born were it not for Ben’s. My folks worked in the Forum and eventually stared courting over lunch; they would pick up smoked meat sandwiches at Ben’s and eat them while sitting in the stands watching the Rocket and the Pocket practice.