I have two ways I like to eat them:
One pack of saltines. One stick of refrigerator cold butter. One can of Wolf brand chili.One good handful of cheddar cheese.
Heat Chili and cheese(and a big dump of cayenne) until melted and steaming in Microwave. Take one saltine in left hand, place moderate pat of cold butter on top. Spoon a dollop of as much chili as you can without burning you hand, on top of the butter. Eat. Repeat until Sleeve of Crackers is empty.
One of my top three hangover fighters.
Hey, for dairy farm family with eight kids during the depression, saltines were a luxury topping on homemade ice cream…
but since you mention it, raspberry jam on saltines is pretty tasty 
After YEARS of fooling around with every conceivable version of chili con carne, I finally hit upon my own quietly personal Bowl of Red, which reflects my Great Lakes roots: Ground beef, LOTS of chile and garlic, onions, very little tomato, oregano and cumin in appropriate quantities, and canned red kidney beans.
My chili REQUIRES saltine crackers on the side. Cornbread or oyster crackers would be a terrible blunder.
I thinly slice cheddar and have it on saltines.
Sardines and saltines. Dash of Tabasco.
That’s all you need.
Does anyone else have a problem with saltines picking up a nasty taste, like they’re absorbing smells in the house?? I have to refrigerate them.
All this talk of saltines and no mention of Mock Apple Pie? Used to be a poor folk substitute for apple pie.
We store our crackers inside one of those specialized Tupperware containers. (I swear, it seems like they have one for every possible food. No, I don’t sell Tupperware, just been to a huge number of parties over the years.)
We got it to keep the crackers from picking up moisture, which all by itself makes them stale and nasty, but I suppose they could also absorb onion odors or whatever if they weren’t being kept out as a side effect.
Once opened, they go south pretty quickly.
I don’t usually like anything other than the regular kind of Saltines, either, but I accidentally bought multigrain and they’re pretty good! They have a slightly toasted, nutty flavor. I also discovered mini-Saltines by accident and I love them in soups. You wouldn’t think they’re any different than regular Saltines or even oyster crackers, but they hold up better to liquid and have more flavor than oyster crackers. Try them if you can find a sale.
Pimento Cheese
Spread or slices? If spread, what brand? Or homemade? If homemade, let’s have your recipe. You may PERT chart this reply, if necessary.
A thin layer of peanut butter and a good dollop of sriracha. It brings out the sweetness in the hot sauce. Also, plain butter and butter/peanut butter as alluded to above or a slice of old cheddar and a slice of good, garlicky kielbasa.
Slices??!? Brand??!?
What kind of troublemaker are you?
There are as many recipes for Pimento Cheese as there are grandmothers. While it was invented in the North, the South has made the spread its own. The basics are rough-grated cheddar cheese, cream cheese, pimentos, mayo, cayenne, salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder and whatever your Secret Ingredient is. Mine is a splash of pickle brine.
Same thing here, but not with the butter.
Crackers are one of my comfort foods- in soup, eaten with chili, or with sharp cheddar cheese.
I always wondered about that. You make it with Rtiz. But apples are cheap, and a 40# box of seconds can be had for about the price of a box of Ritz crakers. I dunno how it is supposed to be cheaper. 
The cute kind.
I know that. I wanted notfrommensa’s recipe. Thanks for revealing your excellent secret ingredient. I hope that doesn’t mean you have to kill me now.
I suppose once upon a time it was cheaper or something? Anyhow, I made it once, and it was startling how it mimicked apple pie. It’s really disconcerting.
You are safe so long as, when you serve the pimento cheese you say that you got the secret ingredient from some otherwise-useless nutball on a message board.
My grandmother’s twist was to use a 50/50 mix of mayo/Miracle Whip in hers. But the basic Truth is that notfrommensa is correct in stating that Pimento Cheese is a classic topper for Saltines.