Damn, I knew there was a harder case than I am somewhere, and you’re it.
(42yo, live across bldg from 'rents, well dressed, musical, witty, noticeable lack of swagger)
My fiancee isn’t gay, but he loves to go antiquing and to flea markets.
My fiancee isn’t gay, but he loves quiche and makes it very well.
I’m not gay, but I wear comfy men’s shoes.
I’m not gay, but I own a lot of tools, power tools, and even a high quality tool belt. (My fiancee thinks it’s cute when I do work and put on the tool belt. Cute as in “adorable,” not “sexy”)
Occasionally I’ve mused that I’m a gay man trapped in a lesbian’s body. I can’t be bothered with makeup, hair, or fashion. I have an enviable collection of power tools, and use them. I have quite a few Indigo Girls and Joan Armatrading CDs in my collection. In Jr high I had a secret crush on Kristy McNichol.
And, I enjoy having sex with someone with a penis. I can aslo belt out quite a few show tunes.
I’m not gay, but I never wear makeup.
I don’t own any kind of shoes other than flip-flops and sneakers.
I hate shopping.
And I would totally do Olivia Wilde.
I am not gay but I like to watch HGTV’s Design Star.
I also color coordinate my Chuck Taylors to my shirt (colored t-shirt, nothing fancy or frilly) and sometimes my hat (one solid color, straight brimmed). That’s not too gay is it?
I wish I remember where I saw the script of this Tripod (Aussie comedy/music troupe) bit … “I’m not a geek! I just … speak Klingon.” “Oh, so you’re kind of like me! I’m not gay, I just love cock.” [Long, awkard pause.]
I’m not gay but I sure do like it when my girlfriend massages my prostate.
(have i said too much?? i jest…maybe…
)
I’m not gay but I own and ride horses. (For those not familiar, about 90% of adult horse riders are females.)
Note: Said females are mostly straight, so any guy having a tough time meeting women should get himself down to the local barn/riding school. If you’re single you’ll be popular. The women are usually confident, self sufficient and able to spare a few hundred dollars a month to spend on horses. A guy could look in worse places. 
John: What is the average age of the women in this fantasy world you speak of?
I’m not gay but I love to suck cocks while taking it up the ass. But I swear I’m not gay!
Most of my friends are women or gay.
I’m not gay, but I hate putting on most make-up, except for lipstick. Also can’t stand high heels. I wear wedge-heel sandals to work when it’s hot, and 2"-heel pumps with nylons when it’s cold, but switch to flats as soon as I possibly can. My mom says one must suffer to be beautiful. I say life’s too short to wear shoes that hurt.
OK, maybe I am gay - in the sense of being a gay man living in a woman’s body. I mean, how else can I explain my fondness for Erasure? Oh yeah, and then there’s my love for slash fanfiction as well. And of course, I enjoy having sex with men, not that I get to do much of that nowadays. 
I’m not gay but I’m single and I wuv my wittle kitty cat.
I’m not gay but I’m going to go puke now.
Now I’m not gay, but I enjoy a good stiff hard cock up my ass. 
Can we at least wait until the second page before anyone makes that joke for the fourth time?
Impressive!!
I think this thread would have done better as “I’m Not Gay/Straight, But…”. But meh, that’s just the gay man in me feeling left out.
~S.P.I.~
If you cook I wanna marry you…
So would I…
A mathematician I’m not. Let’s say they run from ages 10 to 70, with slight over-representation in the 15 to 20 group. Really, other than the few extra teenagers they are pretty well distributed, and then the teenagers are often accompanied by their moms, so there ya’ go!