If I thought for one second that catsix would ever take anyone’s advice on any subject, I’d gladly give it. But I’ll say, without fear of contradiction, that i’ve experienced the wrath of trying to help her. she is a brick wall in that regard. If you have no experience with this, I trust you’ll let us know that you have no idea what she’s like.
So I guess, yes, I’m trying to wound her into opening her fucking eyes for a minute. That’s what the BBQ Pit is for…it’s not for cuddly hug fests.
And thanks for reading the whole OP where I said I was not the model to follow. Just because I’ve got problems doesn’t mean she DOESN’T.
I don’t think anyone is debating if you have life experience - I think they’re objecting to your tendancy to take your “life experience” and bash people over the head with it, totally ignoring that:
a) they probably have their own life experience, and
b) they could have other knowledge about the topic at hand
You’re not actually right about everything and the fact that you refuse to acknowledge other people’s point of view makes interacting with you very tiresome.
I think THAT is the point of this thread - I’m sure jarbaby will correct me if I’m mistaken.
Well, I guess I should inform you that attempts to ‘wound’ me by someone I do not know, have never met, and will very likely never meet are pretty much an exercise in futility.
jarbabyj, there’s no two ways about it – the chick is loco.
I’ve occasionally attempted to read and respond to her posts as though she were a reasonable human being, but it’s a waste of time. She’s a complete nutjob, but worse than that she’s a nasty nutjob. I have rarely been exposed to such a downright mean-spirited, self-absorbed, and irrational person. But since she has never and probably will never have anything remotely worthwhile to say anyway, there’s no real point in paying her any mind at all unless you’re in the mood to get angry at something.
I would like to add that I am posting this while wearing a dainty, pastel-colored nightie that Mummy Dearest sent me as a little birthday prezzie.
I also love chocolate. Oh, and I’m a feminist, too!
I wasn’t going to answer this part of the post because I think that your opinion of me is what it is and will not change.
I have changed my mind, and will say this:
You do not know me. You have never met me. You have never talked to my friends or family, been in my presence, seen me around the people I love or the people who love me.
I am not attempting to sound like the martyr you seem to think I want to be here, either. I am telling you that this forum and my posting on it are not the totality of my life and never can be. This forum is an outlet for many things, a place to express myself and to learn things from others. It’s also a place where you will never know that I have read a thread, learned something I didn’t previously know, and then closed the thread without saying a word. It’s also not the area where I have talked about doing things people think are pretty out there - like driving eight hours to hug a friend because he needed it.
You have seen here, at best, one dimension of my personality and out of that have decided what you think of me as a person. You obviously have a right to think whatever you want about me, and I have a right to believe that attempting to change your impression will be futile or met only with accusations of nailing myself to a cross.
Whatever you may think about my views, I don’t think I’m better than you at everything. At some things, maybe. There is stuff you’re better than me at, I’m sure.
I just don’t know what kind of response you expect here.
catsix, you’re right. We don’t know the totality of you. However, some of us do know the facet of your personality that you present to us on the internet, which is indeed a part of you. We can only assume that the rest of you is like that, too.
I am sitting here at the computer in my lace panties and bunny slippers, listening to Tom Jones and wishing someone would poleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease go to the store to buy me more bon bons. (hint hint wink wink) My man won’t let me drive see’in that I am a grrrrl and all.
XOXOXO
However, I’m also not going to sit around here all day and post a bunch of ‘I am a good person because…’ stuff. I don’t think that would accomplish anything either.
Think what you will. I won’t stay up worrying about it.
I think it has less to do with your beliefs per se and more to do with the fact that you seem to see everything in terms of black and white/right or wrong.
You make no allowances for the fact that other people may have an equally valid viewpoint.
You know, I was firmly in agreement with you in that thread until you made the statement that every woman that you worked with that had ever demanded special treatment and time off was a mother. That was so different from my work place experiences that you lost me there.
Guess what-as a part time farmer, I’m probably the furthest thing you will ever find from a girly girl.
I prefer large animals and tractors to manicures and fashion.
I never read Vogue or Cosmo.
Getting my haircut bores me.
However, that doesn’t mean that I dismiss all woman who enjoy those things as somehow stupid or beneath me.
And that’s what you tend to do- you appear to treat people with differing opinions as contemptible rather than acknowledging that the issues at hand seldom have black/white right/wrong answers.
But that’s all we have to judge you by.
Why don’t you let us see the rest of you?
You forgot the “LOLs” and the smiley faces. What kinda gurl doesn’t use smiley faces? I only wish there was a way to dot an “i” with a heart on this board. Pity, really.
I think, dear, they are expecting you (well, no, expectation is probably rather more optimistic than what they’re trying to convey…) at some point in the future, prior to posting, to take in consideration the fact that a large number of the people here have accumulated a great deal of knowledge in regard to the subjects on which they post. They are not pulling this information out of their ass, and they make just as much of a contribution as do you.
It may also be nice if you stopped raging at everyone who disagrees with you merely because they disagree. Lighten up. Step out of the pit for a little while. There are plenty of threads in other forums you might enjoy. Learn to laugh a little. It’ll help no end. I can tell you, as someone who carried around her anger for longer than you probably have years, It don’t do ya no good. It also tends to alienate possible firends and friendly acquaintances.
I see Catsix has resorted to the Jerry Springer Guest defense: “You don’t know me, shut the hell up! You don’t know me, you don’t know nuthin’ about me!”
And what is a girly girl? Somehow, I don’t see any of the Doper females singing:
Oh, pretty much the one I’m getting. Avoiding the point, looking for sympathy, twisting words to suit your meaning.
You say you use this forum to learn things. Tell me, have you learned that there’s all different kinds of people in the world, that some women are girly and some aren’t? That people’s definition of rape or sexual assault is different from your narrow view?
Have you learned that not all psychologists are “head butchers”?
Have you learned that for some women it takes six weeks to recover from giving birth? Or that some women DON’T abuse maternity leave?
Or do you still assume that your original assumptions were correct? The bottom line is, no, I don’t know you in real life. I know you here, on these boards and in chat. And the shit you spew makes my time here just that much less enjoyable, which I’m sure thrills you to no end.
Currently at work all of the women who have kids consistently miss work and state needing to stay home with ‘the kids’ as the reason. There are five women with kids here.
Of the rest of the women coworkers, there are fourteen who either have never had kids or do not have kids under the age of 20. This group is much less likely to miss work than the other group.
The men have roughly the same attendance record as the women, with two of the men who have kids missing work much more consistently than those who either do not have kids or whose kids are 20 or older. The boss (male) with kids doesn’t bother to miss work so much as make himself a total and complete asshole by bringing them here to run amok through the work place (they ride bicycles in the large hall in the back of the building kind of ‘amok’).
Previous job, the numbers were slightly different, but by and large those who’d miss work the most often were the working mothers. So, whether you agree or not, I have found that in my experience a lenient policy for needing time off because of ‘the kids’ will be heavily abused. That’s the way things have been in the places I’ve worked. If it’s not that way where you work, then I’m happy for you.
Not having friends who don’t share similar interests to me is contempt? If I have nothing in common with someone, why would I socialize with them? Lots of people here really dig bluegrass music, but I don’t. So when they go to their bluegrass concerts, I don’t go. It doesn’t mean I have contempt for them, it just means that I’d rather be at a rock concert.
Couple of reasons, I suppose. Many of those things are quite emotional (like how happy and sad I was that I got to go on a very long road trip to see a friend for what might well have been the last time, because my friend is dying) and I’m not the most open person in the world about that kind of stuff. Perhaps because I think some of the people who dislike me will respond to such things with ‘look at catsix trying to prove she’s a saint.’ when I didn’t mean it that way. Partly because if I write about that I have to admit that the next time I make that drive will very likely be for a funeral. Stuff like that.
Well, on this I have to call you to an extent. I cited to Brownmiller regarding false reporting in rape cases. You (conveniently ignoring that I also offered to provide other cites, and did indeed later provide anothr source) used your general opposition to Brownmiller to disqualify a statistic, without providing any basis for why she is wrong in this particular area. I totally disagree with MacKinnon in her analysis of pronography, for example, but I don’t believe that simply claiming that pornography must not be harmful because that man-hater MacKinnon thinks it is harmful would get me very far in a reasoned discussion. I’d maybe mention the faults in their analysis, or maybe mention the critiques that others have made. Dismissing it because of who the person is kind of smacks of knee jerk reaction. I know it is something everyone does to a greater or lesser extent, but when called on it, you really should respond.
Yes, that’s the general reaction of dopers to situations like the one you describe. We just tear people to shreds in the midst of their grief. You’ve got us all figured out…or is it that you WANT so badly to believe that so it makes you feel like the poor put upon girl of stone with a heart of gold. I’ll tell you what, there are dozens of people on this board I don’t like, and when they go through tough times I know to stay away and keep my mouth shut. I’d grant you the same courtesy.
But here’s a tip. If you have no sympathy or empathy for others, they’ll have none for you.
I already know how to laugh. I already read other threads. I already like who I am.
Telling me that you think I’m an angry youngster will not accomplish anything.
Generally it means they have interests in things typically considered feminine, like shopping for clothes, knick-knacks, crafts, kids, romantic comedy movies, gardening, etc.
Sort of the opposite of ‘tomboy’.
I thought your point was that you think I’m an evil, uncaring, unfeeling bitch? Believe it or not, I don’t want your sympathy. I think you’re wrong about me, but I don’t want you to feel bad for me.
Things I knew before I got to this forum for 100 please, Alex.
Same category for 200, Alex.
Please go back and read the posts in which I said that it is acceptable to be on short term disability while medically necessary. Also, I am aware that some people don’t abuse it. That does not mean it is never abused, or as is my view quite prone to abuse and in need of revamping.
I have no feelings about it one way or the other. Again, believe it or not, I am not on a personal mission to make you unhappy.
I believe that those feminists, personally, have a strong sexism against men and that so do many of their followers as a matter of philosophy. I did not in this thread say a damn thing about any statistics they have made claim to.