Most of Barry Manilow, but especially especially especially “Mandy.”
I remember that one. When he tells the part about how there were two pieces of apple pie for three hungry people, “Mama remembered she really didn’t like apple pie anyway.”
Why didn’t they just recut the two pieces twice more so that there would be six pieces? Everybody could have two. Pfft. Dumbasses.
The MASH movie theme song/lyrics wasn’t exactly uplifting. Nor was China Beaches. What was wrong with those producers?
Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle :gag:
A rather depressing short tune. The few notes at the end of the Incredible Hulk TV series.
I’m a big softie. I kinda like a lot of these.
I need to follow them up with “War Pigs,” “Sympathy for the Devil,” “Break on Through,” and the like though…
Well, the last two are the inimitable Jim Steinman – see also much of Meat Loaf’s work. Roy Bittan from the E Street Band being the pianist on the Bat Out of Hell album.
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Surely it is He Stopped Loving Her Today by George Jones.
George’s own comment as they wrapped up the recording session: “Nobody’ll buy that morbid son of a bitch.”
I thought I was on the money with “asleep” by the Smiths, a little ditty about suicide, but after reading some of the other suggestions I’d humbly submit that perhaps Morrrisey was onto something and was merely suggesting a way of not having to listen to any of the other songs mentioned.
Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton
Whiskey Lullaby - Alison Krauss
Ain’t No Sunshine - Bill Withers
Hurting Each Other - Carpenters
Nik Kershaw - Wouldn’t it be Good
Lyrics
The various versions of “Blue Moon” must be contenders here. I like the Cowboy Junkies version:
My pick, though Most Maudlin Christmas Song is the loathesome “Christmas Shoes”.
“Christmas Shoes” should be the Godwin’s law of bad/maudlin music.
“As an online discussion of bad songs grows longer, the probability mentioning ‘Christmas Shoes’ approaches 1.”
Gloomy Sunday is the gold standard for depressing songs; it almost has to be excluded in order to talk about other songs.
But I’ll throw Kathleen by Townes Van Zandt into the mix.
“Sylvia’s Mother” is satire. It’s a hilarious song – deliberately so.
I’m not afraid to say I love Honey, Seasons in the Sun, Wildfire…
My nom for the thread is one I can’t remember the name of but it’s a country song about a guy and he gets a letter from his woman but he’s mad and doesn’t open it. Weeks later he finally reads it and it says she would wait for him at the train (?) and if he doesn’t show she would go kill herself. Oops.
Harry Chapin’s **Corey’s Coming **and Flowers Are Red are others I roll around in when I’m feeling maudlin.