The mother's day conundrum

I wonder if “Scylla” has enough time to get this embroidered on a throw pillow to give to his mother for Mother’s Day. :smiley:

I am making the supreme Mother’s Day sacrifice. Going to church with mom. I am the only one of her children who will. This, of course, makes me the best one. It’s not that I hate going to church. It is my wont to go to church on Sunday. I do not like going with mom. It’s the church I grew up in. I did not like that church so much then and I do not like it so much now. I’m such a good son!

Also, in addition to a present to mom from me, I will give her an orchid corsage. See, my youngest brother died seven years ago. He always bought mom an orchid corsage and this strange Mother’s Day “Commemorative” plate he got from Og knows where. Seriously, he did this from the time he was fifteen until his death. It was close to a thirty year thing. Sis and I divided up those duties. She finds the weird plate, I do the corsage. Ok, sis is one of the good ones too, but I’m still the best cause I go to church with mom.

Also (why, yes, I have felt the need to complicate Mother’s Day on my own) I give sis a Mother’s Day present. Ok, it’s my sneaky way of saying happy birthday, which she won’t let me do on her real birthday. The younger bro was (is?) her twin. Thus, she contends her birthday is not a happy time since his death. Sis and I are close, so I feel bad not doing anything, so I decided she gets a Mother’s Day present and she can’t say anything because it’s not her birthday.

My other two brothers do stuff for mom also. They always get her nice presents. Thus they are good. Still I’m the best cause I go to church with her.

Weeeeell…

To a hypothetical individual “Aspidistra” whose maternal grandmother was an evil harpy who nonetheless loved to be ‘recognized’ appropriately on Mother’s Day, and whose mother therefore strongly discouraged any recognition of the day in any way, shape or form, it is actually pretty damn funny. If only to see how seriously the rest of the world takes this Hallmark Holiday.

(apart from Sigmagirl’s post. That was not funny, it was sad and made me want to beat someone with a Big Clue Stick)

Speaking as a mother, I do have a birthday, you know, just like everybody else. And three kids means three more people to wish me happy birthday on it. Win!

Mother’s Day, Father’s day, etc are all manufactured holidays that can be observed or not observed as each familial unit sees fit. I do nice things for my mom all the time, because I love her and appreciate everything that she did for me, not because some calendar told me to.

What, you can’t merely observe her behavior?

Unless you’re hinting that it’s simply a problematic relationship that provides you with nothing to observe, in which case please consider the question withdrawn, with my apologies for prying…