The Mundane Pointless Laptop Shipping Story

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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I ordered a laptop during the Black Friday sales. I was super excited, because finally, I would have a gaming laptop that would not give oft wears hats and SenorBeef and everyone else ample grounds to make fun of me. You know, one with an actual video card?

It was supposed to ship in 1-3 days.

Shortly thereafter, I got a notification that shipping had been delayed and the laptop probably wouldn’t arrive until after Christmas. Darn it, I had really been looking forward to playing with it, and now I’d have to wait until mid-January to get my hands on it.

Then, I got a FedEx shipping notification! It didn’t say who it was from, but what else could it be other than the laptop, right? I couldn’t remember anything else that I’d ordered…

Of course, I ran out and told everyone that my laptop was coming and we were going to have SO MUCH FUN playing all my games on it.

Well.

The next day, I realized that the shipping notification wasn’t for the laptop.

No. Not at all.

It was for beans. Ten pounds of beans.

I know, I know! But I have a favorite kind of beans and they are delicious, so of course I have to order them in bulk every once in a while because you can’t find them in the grocery store. Doesn’t everyone?

So not only am I NOT getting my laptop tomorrow, I now have to go back and tell THE ENTIRE WORLD that I couldn’t tell the difference between a laptop and a big bag of beans. And it had to be beans. Beans are just silly.

How completely embarrassing.

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clearly you don’t know beans.

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Guys, we are going to have SO MUCH FUN with ten pounds of beans!

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So what’s your favorite kind of beans? And where can I order them from at ten pounds an order and get expedited delivery? (I’m looking for ideas for Christmas presents for my wife…)

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My favorite beans are Anasazi beans, which become inexplicably delicious with no additional seasoning. I ordered mine from North Bay Trading Co.

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There’s a “Lentil Inside” joke around here somewhere, but I can’t quite catch it.

ETA: I looked up those beans, and I’m going to try them.

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I know! I should have everyone over for a beanbag toss! How awesome would that be?

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Campfire!

I don’t know your wife, but I’m thinking if you get her 10 lb of beans for Christmas she’ll be your ex-wife shortly thereafter.

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You’re full of beans, and so’s your old [del]man[/del]laptop.

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Just not near a widow, right…?

“Fee…! Figh…! Tablet…! Phone…! Your LapTop Won’t Arrive By Drone…!”
“Say…! You look a little like Gary Oldma-”** Squish!**

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My wife orders a few lb of beans every month. From a coffee roaster in Ottawa. And they are generally delivered the next day.

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Try http: / / www. ranchogordo .com … REALLY good beans, and lots of 'em! AND excellent customer service.

We have 1 1/2 lbs. BEANS (cooked up already, in the fridge), about 6 lbs. addl. dry beans in the cupboard, and I mentioned to the spouse that I rilly SHOULD make some refried beans to go along with our turkey mole enchiladas :smiley:

He was not amused. But I thought it was a great idea :dubious: :smack:

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10 lbs of beans should be plenty to make a gaming abacus.

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Cool Beans! :smiley:

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Salsa can be good with beans.

Salsa can also be good with chips.

Computers have chips.

You take bites of beans-containing foods.

Computers also have bytes.

And there’s a programming concept called Java beans.

So I definitely understand your confusion :smiley:

I do suggest, however, that you don’t use the quick-soak method on the laptop. Overnight, and boil for several days, or you will never be able to chew it.

And the legumes just have crappy wi-fi reception.

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I am intrigued by these beans.

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I agree.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit –
The more you eat, the more you compute.

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The folks at North Bay Trading should send you a commission - I just ordered several packages of soup mix from them as a result of this thread.

I will try to resist the temptation to throw in a few computer peripherals when I cook a batch of soup. I mean, a lot of them suggest you add meat but I don’t think a mouse (of either sort) would be well-received.