Some more of my favorite signatures on the boards:
(Please contribute early and often)
Some mornings it just doesn’t seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
Emo Philips (stolen from matt’s webpage)
Jesus saves, Allah forgives, and Cthulhu thinks you’d make a good sandwich.
(This space for rent.)
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
No, it’s just a wild stab in the dark.
Which incidentally is what you’ll be getting if you don’t start being more helpful.
I’m not ahead of my time; I’m ahead of everyone else’s.
“There ain’t no devil, there’s just God when he’s drunk.”
-Tom Waits
“The people of Crete unfortunately make more history than they can consume locally.” - Arlington Stringham, MP
Heisenberg was driving down the Autobahn whereupon he was pulled over by a policeman. The policeman asked, “Do you know how fast you were going back there?” Heisenberg replied, “No, but I know where I am.”
Wickedness is a myth invented by good people to account for the curious attractiveness of others…Oscar Wilde
“I can only offer you one piece of advice: NEVER divide by zero. If you do, the world will explode, creation will end, and we will all burn forever in a pit of infinity.”
"The Fair is the one place where you can throw up, and no one thinks you’re drunk or sick.
I got those new silicon spurs - instead of jingles and jangles, they have bells and whistles
The glorious sunset of my heart was fading. Soon, the super karate monkey death car would park in my space. But Jimmy has fancy plans, and pants to match. -Jimmy James, Macho Business Donkey Wrestler
There’s a pork chop in every beer.
“My shambling hordes of the Undead now smell minty fresh.”
-Arkon, Dark Lord of Chaos
The discovery of a new dish does more for the happiness of mankind than the discovery of a star.-- Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin
Gladstone: Mr. Disraeli, you will probably die by the hangman’s noose or a vile disease.
Disraeli: Sir, that depends upon whether I embrace your principles or your mistress.
I once lost my corkscrew and had to live on food and water for several days
(W.C. Fields)
How could Anarchy have an internationaly accepted symbol?
If I run the juicer backwards, can I get my orange back?
“I do have my lucid moments. I only wish I knew if this was one of them.” --Fentible
If cows could laugh, would milk come out of their noses?
…and me with this horrible pain in all the diodes down my left side…
Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It’s a shark riding on an elephant’s back, just trampling and eating everything they see.
I have great faith in fools, self-confidence my friends call it.—
Edgar Allan Poe
Last sound before the Big Bang: “Hey, hey, don’t push that…”