Hi,
I’m Jorel, some of you probably recognize the name (Superman’s father on Krypton) If this is not enough to warrant teasing, which I suspect it is I submit the following shtuff about me:
Likes: life, most of the time…the Simpsons…reading…Star Wars baseball (SF Giants) cute duckies
Dislikes: bad drivers…vegemite (sp?)…Hooman…other stuff
Other: I rent, screen my calls, have 2 cats, and I’m a SHE.
You have been welcomed. By me, no less. So get over it and quit your whining. BTW, feel glad about losing the 70 posts. I didn’t want to say anything, but it was going straight to your thighs.
All this (except for the last two things) puts you at the top in the running for the position of “Crunchy Frog’s New Favorite Doper”. If you gain that position, the reward involves many other positions. You may want to start the yoga classes ASAP.
So in short, here’s your damn welcome. Don’t be an ass, but show it as often as you like. And, because I haven’t done this in a long time but people seemed to like it in the old threads… Bite me newbie.
Don’t forget, it is my job here at the SDMB to screen all new female Dopers. Send any and all nekkid pics you have of yourself to the e-mail addy Ireallyreallyreallywant2Cyanekkid@hornyfrog.com.
And don’t worry, this is strictly professional. I’m a doctor, you see.
Well, not a doctor, but I’ve had a basic medical training.
I got the First Aid Merit Badge when I was a Boy Scout.
Unstained 
Actually I’m not that much of a Buffy fan - just liked the picture.
Should anyone want to see how my extremely crappy camera thinks it looks, there is a picture at http://cze.dk/buffy.jpg
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the Grand Master Of Welcoming Crunchy Frog may pop in from time to time. To hit up the female newbies for naked pictures for his ummm, scientific research. You can recognize him by the glazed look in his eyes, the slightly open mouth and the wrist brace.
Bernard Marx pops in
Anita Byrant’s autobiography? Curious George Finds The Man With The Yellow Hat’s “Special” Drawer? Munging For Dummies?
alto wanders about
Great. We’ve been invaded by street performers. If we get mimes, I’m loading up the tranquilizer darts. I will give you a shiny new quarter however if you can do “Wang Dang Sweet Poontang” in the round.
EggNogg…I don’t know what the sweet jesus he does
Spelling errors? check
Grammar errors? By the pantload
Did you have a coherent post but decided it would be fun to run it through babelfish about twenty times? Or did you take drumsticks and play “Wipeout” on the keyboard?
Well, I’m not exactly a newbie either (looks like I showed up about the same time BBJ did.)
I’m almost positive that I was not given a proper welcome. But I’ve made myself quite at home here anyway thankyouverymuch.
In my short time here I’ve:
. Had one of my threads locked and buried (hopefully).
. Been stalked and harassed twice (by the same person).
. Had numerous requests for nekkid pics.
. Received nekkid pics.
Well, I’m a noo-bee.
Zur Person:
Soon I’m going to be moving to Seattle, WA to start grad school. In the meantime, I’m occupying myself by trying to ingratiate myself to the society here on these pages.
I speak German and wear glasses.
Oh and I like cats.
Well sorry you never got your welcome, but my Welcome Wagons were up and running at the time, so it’s your own fault really. Don’t look at me like that, you want a spanking?! Take some responsibility for your own inaction woman!
**
Would that be the one about the time you got drunk and had the wild orgy with all those guys but when you woke up the next morning you found yourself in the monkey house at the zoo? That was nasty.
That bit with the turkey baster has spoiled Thanksgivings for me forevermore.
And that thing you did with the plunger was just wrong.
**
You never told me to stop. How rude of you to suddenly bring it up here, like this. I’m very sensitive, you know. Are you trying to make me cry?!
**
And that’s sure to make you very popular.
I can’t say anything about receiving, but as for sending nekkid pics, I have established during my tenure here that I am the female newbie inspector. I shall expect to see naked pics of you in my inbox presently or um… or else.
Yeah, or else.
E-mail addy is conveniently available at the bottom of this post.
I already made a 1st post and got welcomed (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=122150), but I’m greedy so I’ll post here too.
Quick summary: Male, 24, live near Philadelphia, likes many things(akin myself to a renaissance man), never watched Buffy, plays guitar & bass, enjoys topics such as history, SF, astronomy, physics, arts, computers, cars, sports, literature, gaming, music…that’s about all I can think of right now.
Origin of user name: Frank was already taken, making me the 2nd Frank here. It’s beautiful in it’s simplisticy, is it not?
And watch out for my sarcastic humor, it could bite your head off.
Not sure if you would call me new or not, but since I didn’t post to the last one I want in on the action.
I like pina coladas, and getting stuck in the… must stop posting while listening to the radio…
I lurked here for a while before registering, I’m a server admin/ tech support/scapegoat. I play pool, and bow hunt (target only), I have a 1/2 pit 1/2 rot named kitty. I’ve gone thru just about the whole threadspotting archive.
My first post was the wholes in the underwear thread for the obligatory where do you put your legs then joke. The server crashing floored me, but got rid of a couple of embarrassing threads. I refrained from posting to Cecil’s 100th post but by Bob it was hard.
I still like Sarah Sylvia Cynthia Stout, I’ll read anything, am sleep deprived, and go out to much. I love children but they are much cuter when someone else takes them home for the night, and finally I know the dumbest joke in the world.
Ok hardy, run with it.
P.S. I still spell check everything before I post, and preview on my companies internal Vbulletin board because the Hamsters have enough work to do without me.
And while I do spell check I need to watch for synonyms.
Homonyms too :o
(have the feeling I’m gonna get ripped apart for this)
I’m not a really newbie either but I like the idea og being welcomed.
OK - lets get the teasing over with, I’M A CUBS FAN!
Go ahead, I’l wait for you to stop laughing at me…
Other that that, I have a 5 YO daughter I adore & I’m married to a pretty cool lady (but that doesn’t mean I’m not also interested in Nekkid Pics)!
I have a masters degree in Industrial Engineering which I haven’t used in years, and Scylla makes me shoot beer out of my nose with the majority of his posts.
I eagerly await your greeting.
Also, how does one obtain these “nekkid” pictures.
Let’s nip this in the bud before hijackings get out of control. I’m only popping in from time to time to give hardy a hand, as I am semi-retired from this welcoming business. The vast majority will get welcomes from her, but be patient.
Every post made extends the thread. After a certain number of posts, the threads get too long for the server to load easily and the thread needs to be closed.
So any posts that hijack this thread (which will be long enough as it is) or are minor additions to on original post (leechbabe and Clever Hans I’m looking at you ;)) only bring the closing of this thread that much sooner.
The boards are slow and there’s a few people needing welcomes. I don’t know for sure, but hardy may be waiting till later in the day when the boards don’t have as much traffic on them to post her welcomes. In the meantime, I’m not gonna welcome everyone, cuz this is her thread.
Of course, anything hardy says supercedes anything I’ve just said as this is her thread. But please people, think of the children… :smack: I mean bandwidth! Think of the bandwidth for our children!
Or something like that.
And since Broodha can’t keep checking this thread for his welcome all day and still keep his attention on the porn he’s trying to download, let’s get this eager beaver taken care of:
Um, ok, you stumped me. I can’t think of anything interesting about anything you’ve written there. Let’s see…
rifles through references
Seattle is rainy… can make a bad joke about needing an umbrella…
Could make a grad school joke, but we don’t know the field of study…
There’s the German thing, but Germans have no sense of humor to play with there…
cats… can make a joke about liking cats with soy sause and a little hot mustard…
Nope, you’re too dull to welcome properly. Keep eagerly awaiting and I suggest while in grad school take a couple classes on Personality Development and then check in when you’ve got your Master’s.
what the heck.
I’m a newbie.
I was directed to SD site while looking for an answer to the age old question of whether dogs have uvulae. (According to Cecil, they do.)
Put that Penguin book of quotations away you pretentious fool and give me some real abuse. You could have just clubbed me with a dictionary and I would have been more impressed.
egg
hardygrrl thank you for the offer of a welcome. You may now welcome me. Should you not respond to this post in the next 40 minutes, then I will not see it until tomorrow. Should you not respond to this post, then I will not see it.
A relative newbie (1 month and 4 days). Have been lurking for about 10 months and found the humour, wisdom, and in-your-face criticism very entertaining and informative.
Male, laid off from work, British by birth, wannabe American, single. Enjoy reading, having a beer, films, dining out, women, American football (not that soccer stuff).
Have opened one thread. Have not yet taken part in GD, but may do some day.
WSLer is an acronym of sorts for the name of the band I used to be in, While Supplies last. I was in the band for a little over 7 years and I’m the only living member, the other three guys having died/been killed within an 18 month span.
Currently living up in Bath ME, with my dad in the lavish retirement castle that is my and my brothers inheiritance.
My mom found out last March that she had 4th stage lung cnancer, and went thru chemo and was in remission for about 2 months, but then it came back stronger then before and early in March she had two severe heart attacks and died at 9:00 AM March 12. It was good that the 4 people she loved the most, me, my brother, my dad, and my mom’s brother were with her when she died.
So, I’m trying to deal with that, so i’m taking a number of drugs, none of which have helped me sleep very well at all the last few months.
Oh, I’m 33 in case you’re wondering. As to why I’m 33 and still living at home, well, the lack of money is a big reason, but also the fact that the last 2 years of my life have been a pretty horrible slow motion train wreck.
To trim it down quite a bit, I got into grad school the same day my gf broke up with me. went down to Tallahassee to start FSU’s library science program, but realized I didn’t want to do grad school for me as much as I wanted to do it for my 'rents and also being down there would give my ex & I the opportunity to get back together. But, that ended with me spending 36 lovely hours in the Leon County Jail and then getting T-boned by a 16 year old in a BMW 535i who ran a stop sign at 45 mph,:eek: :smack:, all of which meant that I moved up to scenic Bath Maine, which is where I have been, more or less.
I’ve applied to a number of radiology certification programs, but have rolled snake-eyes on all but one, who I have yet to hear from.
I just started working at L.L. Bean working as a mutli-packer. the pay is pretty good, $9.50/hr, but i have to get up at about 6:15 in order to get in on time, which wouyld be fine except these days I usually don;t get to sleep until 1:30 or 2:00.
I like reading, I used to collect comic books, now I’m getting into graphic novels. I like Sandman very much as well as Watchmen, Miracleman and a few others. As far as music, they answer is, Austin Powers voice “Yes. please.” *Austin Powers voice.
Oh yes, I also love bunnies, but I adore one rabbot in particular, The Prince of Cuteness, The Duke of Adoreableness, Payton el Bun. Pictures may be forthcoming if I can find my scanner and figure out how to use the damn thing.
I’m somewhat of a newbie. I actually read the boards for about 2 years before finally getting around to registering.
I’m a student, and work in an Ice Cream store, I live somewhere in California- and am involved in a wonderful (but somewhat complicated) relationship with my SO.
My user name is a mixture of my name (Claire <— no stalking me!) and terrific, which I hope I am.
I like: Baseball, music (anything but country or polka), my kitten (Madeline, She's perfect ), science, math, good comedy, cheese, hiking, beautiful places, movies
I hate: Docotors who don’t know what they’re doing, Stupid Comedy, hypocrites
I am: pretty!!!
So do I get a welcome now?
Good gravy, I go play hockey and look what happens. Flocks of newbies. “welcome me! validate my existance!” Crunchy does have a point, for once. Patience is a virtue, kids. And think of the hamster, won’t you?
*pluralgravity states *
Hmm, I could make crotchety old man jokes, but he might be Southern…screw it. ::hands you a basket loaded with Tucks Pads and Viagra::
in waltzes Jorel
As a Cubs fan, I normally can’t mock other people’s taste but…you know Jedi are bad on defense. Sure, all that light saber stuff helps with batting but not with the glove.
Not TV’s Frank but Frank #2
Or learned to read either, I guess. I hate to do this but it’s firehose time. No whimpering and take it like a man!
zoid is my new favorite Doper
YES! Will you hold my hand and wipe my tears away the day the Boys in Blue are mathmatically eliminated? Buy me beer and tell me Ryne Sandberg stories? Imitate Gary Matthew Sr’s batting stance?
Clever Hans multiposts
Somewhere in Michigan, Ted Nugent cries. Then he slaughters anything lower on the food chain and dances in its entrails.
How to spot a Tech Support Worker. They make more money than you and do a tenth of the work. They know every website on earth. No, really.