So me and a guy I work with will randomly quote Office Space lines about wanting that stapler back and moving the desk. And sometimes start saying Inigo Montoya’s lines. But today he walks up to me, looks me in the eye, and says, “I want my stapler back you son of a bitch!” And I just lost it. Just had to share that.
Hey Peter, man! That’s inconceivable!
Most likely I’m gonna need to uhh… go ahead, and uhhh… kill you tommorow.
I deal with the god damn customers so the engineers don’t have to. I have people skills! It’s not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don’t even exercise.
You keep using that TPS Report. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Hey, Peter, man! Channel 9, breast exam! There’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world!
I used to be over by the window, and I could see the shrieking eels, and they were married.
Have fun storming the PC Load Letter!
It just so happens that your printer here is only mostly out of paper. There’s a big difference between mostly out of paper and all out of paper.
Why do you wear so much bling?
Bling is terribly comfortable. I think everyone will be wearing bling in the future.
Hello. My name is Milton Montoya. You took my red Swingline. Prepare to die.
We’re gonna need to go ahead and move you downstairs into storage B. Keep the lights on; it’s infested with rodents of unusual size.