This metal band is great! I put it all and all of my aches and pains disappear! It’s like magic only it’s scientific! How does it work? I dunno, I’m not a scientist – just as long as it’s all natural! It balances my ions! I’m an idiot and I’m on TV!
The above taken verbatim from a telethon long commercial that I’m too lazy to get up and change. Well, all of it except the I’m an idiot part. That was inferred.
You forgot “It’s so revolutionary! It has a U.S. patent! No one has ever come up with a design like this!”
Maybe it’s because no one is that stupid. I’m also pretty sure that your body could care less about “balanced” ions. And they never did explain where it “pulls in” the ions from.
The beautiful thing about capitalism and an open market is that you can sell utterly worthless crap and people will line up 10 deep to buy it off you.
The sad, scary thing about human nature is that you can sell utterly worthless crap and people will line up 10 deep to buy it off you.
I’m all for being able to sell whatever the hell you want. I have the stock, if I had the skill I’d be selling people little paper sacks of dog poop.
But all this is neither here nor there. I look at dubious “medical” devices in the same way ecologists look at changing weather patterns. If enough people die without issue because some guy on tv hocking scrap metal told them not to bother with all that Western-style medicine, then I for one consider the gene pool to have been vastly improved.
Another beautiful thing about capitalism: it forces the consuming public to use whatever remains of their critical thinking skills.
And anybody quick enough to get all the copper wiring out of the building before the rest of the looters has made his fortune.
I, too, was wondering who in their right mind would see this commercial and think “Hey! Let me send in my two easy payments of 49.95$ for a stupid peice of metal that’s not magical but really, really scientific.”
Check this…someone actually GAVE me one last night. Put it on my wrist and said here if you don’t believe me try it. Wear it for a couple of weeks and then tell me…yadda yadda…Okay
I’ve had it on now for about twenty hours. So far it feels like the circulation is being restricted just enough for a little tingle to develop. The bracelet is also distracting enough to make me not focus on the pain in my back. (Stress and fatigue due to landscaping w/ cross ties last week)
The shrink in me is curious enough to go through w/ this little experiment for a little while anyway.
Hey, ratty, I’m really intrigued by your offer of little paper sacks of dog poop! Do you accept major credit cards? Do you offer any sort of easy payment plan?
Damn, I can hardly wait for the UPS guy to deliver!