All of these movie are well and good.
But I’m striving for a lower level.
No stars…no name directors.
Just trash you have found on video that just not belong there.
And I’m not talking your home movies either…
None exists.
You’re correct that there’s a difference between a movie you hated and a movie that is truly god-awful. In a really wretched movie, one that’s hard to even laugh at sometimes, there’s a quality of total incompetence that makes you wonder how these people were given the equipment to make a movie in the first place, and why they thought anybody would ever want to see this finished product. I promise the movies I mentioned (and at least some of the others) meet those criteria.
Axe 'Em
You can hardly hear anything anyone says. Though that might be a good thing.
Well, I was expecting a parody of Meatballs-type summer movies. But sometimes parodies are good and sometimes they’re bad. Wet Hot was lamely done parody, the worst movie I saw that year.
I’ve seen this, on a big screen, no less. The novelty is a western populated entirely by little people. Once that odd proposition becomes familiar after the first reel, bordeom sets in when you realize it’s much like every other low-budget western that the poverty row studios churned out at the time. A good “bad” movie has to be entertaining, and this was just tedious.
I give you:
I saw this when I was a kid and I thought it sucked even then. I don’t think I ever saw a movie try so hard to be funny while being exactly the opposite. I remember my Dad driving me home from the theater, and I was actually indignant. How could anybody make such a rotten excuse for a movie, anyway? It dawned on me even then: They’re playing on our jones for Star Wars to sell us CRAP! It’s a scam!
It’s like the movie gods came up with Spaceballs to right some cosmic wrong in sci-fi spoofedom created by this movie.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you The House of Usher. No, not the 1960 Vincent Price House of Usher; this is the 1980’s “remake.”
I can’t remember where I watched it. I can’t remember why I watched it. I wish I didn’t remember watching it. I do remember that the “twist” ending pissed me off more than any other lame ending has, before or since.
Deeds not words
Nope you aren’t the only one.
My contribution is The Hotel New Hampshire. No plot that I could detect.
I’ve seen it and you couldn’t make me take it. 
Depressing how many of these I’ve seen, and how many I’ve actually enjoyed on some level.
But none hit the depths of Leonard Part 6. I’d rather watch *Highlander II * twice before seeing LP6 again. I don’t blame the rest of you for blocking it from your memory.
Special mention: A Life Less Ordinary.
Some of the bombs I’ve seen or at least seen parts of:
Monster Dog: Alice Cooper’s first, and possibly only, movie
Viking Massacre: An Italian film featuring Vikings with blonde hair and dark roots
Hell Comes to Toad Town: It stars Rowdy Roddy Piper. 'Nuff said.
Laserblast: An incomprehensible film about a teenage kid who finds an alien weapon and uses it to, uh, I’m not sure.
Hanger 18: This is where all the “Area 51 has alien bodies” stories got their start.
Zombie Lake - The kind of film that you would use in “Clockwork Orange” style aversion therapy to stop people going to the movies.
The Untold aka Sasquatch - Lance Henriksen out for a paycheck.
Barring movies that were INTENDED in some regard to be “bad” (i.e. evil dead, army of darkness, attack of the killer tomatoes)
My vote for an all time horrible movie is Soldier with Kurt Russel, following that are any of the Police Academy movies, and maybe The Wraith (older movie with Charlie SHeen)
Just my two cents…
Daylon
I like Leonard Part 6. It’s just so surreal. And the parts of Ice Pirates I’ve seen, I liked.
I swear to you, people, it’s Da Hip Hop Witch. Go. Watch. It is a Blair-Witch Ripoff, about a witch who apparently hunts Hip-Hop stars - giving the filmmaker an excuse to film cameos with a number of names - wrapped with the flimsiest and hokiest excuse for a plot, ever.
Well my eyes bled while watching Mimic and I prayed for death during Highlander II but for a couple of years now I have thought the very, very, very worst film of all time, a film so utterly foul and wretched that all involved should be spanked, made to apologise and then hung from lampposts as an example to other film-makers is none other then the remake of Rollerball.
But entirely unexpectedly a worthy contender for such infamy came to my attention and tortured my aching eyes. Truly this ‘movie’ plumbs the very depths and redefines the meaning of ghastliness. I refer to none other then Megiddo: The Omega Code 2. Jesus wept!
I don’t think most of these films can compete with ones like my suggestion, Tales from the Past. Most of the flicks on this thread have good production values – they’re technically well-made, despite the awful writing and performances. A lot of them were actually shown in big theaters, and had advertising, and all. But TFTP fails on all counts – not only are the writing, acting, and directing incredibly awful (really awful, not “I think it could be done better” awful), but the film looks dark and muddy, the colors badly muted, the sound quality terrible. I’ve shown Megaforce and Ice Pirates and even Plan 9 from Outer Space at my annual Bad Film Festivasls, because they’re entertainingly bad. But TFTP is just painful to watch.
Along these lines, consider The Prehistoric Sound: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058601/ The premise is that a bunch of folks open up a cave and release an imprisoned dionosaur. But they didn’t have much of a budget, so the dinosaur is invisible!! This film features the worst invisibility effects you’ve ever seen.
Or The Unknown Terror, in which a mad scientist creates a fungus that runs rampant in caves in a jungle. The fungus is played by soap bubbles, and looks kinda fun, in fact. As if hey invented the bubble rave a couple of decades too early. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0051137/
Or Larry Buchanan’s really awful remakes of movies that were grade Z to begin with. The remakes have even lower technical qualities than the originals:
Creature of Destruction http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0061529/ (remake of The She Creature)
Invasion of the Eye Creatures (as seen on MST3K) http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0059161/ (remake of the not-too-bad Invasion of the Saucer Men)
Zontar, the Thing from Venus http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0061217/ (Remake of **It Conquered the World, although with a cooler title).
I’ve got to point out, with all due respect Reeder, that any one of us could max out our credit cards and make drek like Cornman or Manos, the Hands of Fate, but it takes a special skill to assemble millions of dollars and a very popular movie star like Kevin Costner and make both Waterworld and then The Postman. Now that guy deserves his own special oscar, one that’s been smashed up with a hammer and covered in tar and feathers.
“Kiss of the Tarantula.” Filmed in Columbus, GA - Mr SCL was in it - he’s a great guy but this movie is sooooooooo bad he will hardly admit to it. The local film society had a screening of it a few years ago and he refused to attend. I really don’t blame him - we all do things when were are young that we regret later!
Hell Comes to Frogtown, actually. And Rowdy Roddy Piper starred in one really good B-movie, John Carpenter’s They Live, which might feature the best fight scene of all time.
My votes for worst movies are Pink Flamingos and The Doom Generation. Nothing cool, funny, or redeeming about either of them.
Or how about The Astounding She-Monster ? Noty only does it have one of the worst titles ever, it has really bad black and white film quality to add to the terrible plot and acting
When the star ripped her costume, they had neither the time nor money to repair it. So sometimes she walked away backwards to hide the fact.
“Animala” from The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra was pretty obviously based on Shirley Kilpatrick’s “She-Monster”, only in that case the poor acting and film quality were obviously done on purpose.
Cool poster for TASM, though.