The 1998 version of Godzilla. One of the worst parts was the “Jurassic Park” rip-off with all of Godzilla’s hatchlings chasing Our Heroes (and I use that term loosely) around Madison Square Garden ala the velociraptors.
You’d think the homosexuals running Hollywood would like to clear up the confusion instead of mucking it up further. :rolleyes:
You forgot baby OG!
I was going to nominate Radioactive Dreams, which is about a couple of boys who spend World War III in a fallout shelter, reading Mickey Spillane novels, and when they emerge into the Mad-Max-like post-nuclear wasteland they talk like Bogart and wear fedoras and things. That could be amusing, except that it wasn’t. It takes itself *very seriously * and seems to be trying to say something important about, well I don’t actually know what it’s trying to say, but it wants you to pay attention and not laugh.
But then I read the thread about The Item. I haven’t seen it, but I think it trumps Radioactive Dreams.
Which is still really bad, though.
Satisfaction with Justine Bateman is pretty horrible. We walked out of the theater on that one.
From imdb: “Satisfaction is a movie about five teenagers who have a band called Mystery. Justine Bateman plays the leading singer of the band called Jennie Lee.”
You can sense the riveting plot from these few lines.
I would be remiss if I didn’t include Cool World an utterly forgettable dark clone of Roger Rabbit. It starred some unknown non-actor Val Kilmer Wannabe. I can’t remember his name. Chad Bitt, or Tad Zitt, or Bad Titt or something like that. Whatever.
OG NO CRY! OG SMASH!
Stories from the Second Floor gets my vote. Although, because of my jones for Zhang Ziyi, I just watched one called Purple Butterfly, which is just about as bad.
BTW, I love Plan 9, especially the way they got rid of Bela Lugosi (hit by a car off-camera; all you hear is a squeal of tires and a scream).
I have said it before, and I will say it again…“Satan’s Cheerleaders”.
I saw this on the Sci-Fi channel once. There wasn’t anything to point and laugh at, and there certainly wasn’t anything present to make up for that. The result was a completely wasted afternoon.
I’ve actually managed to avoid the most “popular” bad movies in this thread. Hmm.
It took some searching at IMDb to come up with a title I’ve long suppressed, but I finally managed to locate Wild in the Streets.
I know that it gets many positive reviews over there, but believe me, I was exactly the right age to see it when it first came out and even then I remember thinking it was a candidate for the worst film ever.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:
Blair Witch Project.
I want my money back!! :mad:
Yor, the Hunter from the Future
I caught this stinker on Sci-Fi around 3:00AM a couple years back. It’s absolutely the worst film I’ve ever seen. Everything about it is bad. Let’s run down the list:
Plot advanced by completely random and illogical happenings. Check.
An extremely blonde, buff, and dumb hero wearing a loin-cloth. Check.
Cavemen fighting papier-mâché dinosaurs. Check.
Straight-outta-the-80s cheese rock soundtrack. Check.
Spaceships, androids, and lasers, oh my! Check.
A most ineffective Evil Overlord. Check.
Never in my life have I laughed so hard because of a film. I was literally in tears the entire time. I’m currently trying to buy it on VHS, but it’s a hard one to find.
There were two ways to see Blair Witch. I saw it the night it came out, when rumors were still flying around that it was pieced together using found footage, and the back story is real. There is nothing explicitly supernatural in the film to make it obviously fake. In the theater that night, I was terrified. Easily the most scared I’ve ever been in a movie.
When I rented it later, I was incredibly disappointed. Not just in the transition from theater to home, but in the inability to suspend disbelief.
It does fail as a movie. But as an experience when it was unknown, it was amazing.
End hijack.
My ex saw it in the theater and loved it. When we rented it, I was so bored I sat twiddling my thumbs.
The thing was, when the posters first came out, I noticed they didn’t say anything like “A true story” or anything like that and I figured they would have if it was. So I kind of figured it was a fake from the beginning. Probably why I didn’t see it in the theaters.
Most movies you need a certain mindset for. This is one of the extreme cases of that.
Death Race 2000 is pretty damn bad. Starring Sylvester Stallone and drumroll David Carradine. My God how I hate David Carradine. You can catch it once in a while on AMC at about 4 am. That’s how I found it.
Why am I always the first person in these threads to bring up Boxing Helena? That stuff makes Ed Wood look like great art!
First it’s a really badly-executed feminist piece! Then it’s a really badly-executed psychological profile of a prisoner falling in love with their captor! Then cue the soft-core porn while a legless, armless woman falls in love with the crazy doctor who sawed off all her limbs! Throw in some guys with guns for good measure, and then it turns out it was all just a dream.
No wonder Kim Basinger gave up half her fortune to get out of that film. Bleagh.
Recently, in my Sir Gawain class, I heard about Sword of the Valiant, a horrible adaptation of the Green Knight story. Apparently, Connery is wearing Green Armour that completely covers him except for a square at his chest that exposes his chest hair…
Carrie Fisher + Chevy Chase + several dozen midgets + a metric shitload of cocaine = Under the Rainbow.
Hey! Please don’t let me be the only Doper who paid good money to see silver lame’ jumpsuited, headband wearing Barry Bostwick and Michael Beck in “Megaforce”! Even at the tender age of 13 or thereabouts, I knew this was a lame movie, not worth the price of the film it was printed on.
Lord of the Rings.
Not the Peter Jackson version–that goes in my list of “Best movies of all time”.
No, folks…
The Ralph Bakshi version.
shudder