I was going to mention Highlander 2, but there’s no way I can top RickJay’s description. I’m glad he didn’t describe any plot or scenes from the movie, because I’ve almost succeeded in erasing it from my mind.
Star Trek V, directed…by…WILLIAM…SHATNER…is an embarassment to the whole ST genre, and certainly to the movie industry in general. But, I’ll let this guy explain in full detail why it sucked so bad.
I was going to let someone else post this, as I assumed everyone had heard of it by now…but the thread is at two pages and no one has mentioned “Night of the Lepus”. I won’t say it’s the worst movie ever, as I (happily) haven’t seen some of the contenders in this thread, but it deserves mention.
I mean, it has everything: Poor lighting. Nonexistent acting. Bad rubber suits–furry ones. Bunnies sitting in a tiny model of a town, looking disinterested. Yawning bunnies with roaring sounds dubbed over them. DeForest Kelley trying desperately to keep a straight face so he can collect his paycheck. The National Guard fighting the same stock closeup of a running rabbit over and over.
Ill-conceived and worse-executed, “Night of the Lepus” is a Bad Movie.
Ha! I love that movie! I think I am the only one. It is Kurt’s understated killing machine attitude, no machismo, no charisma, just kill who he is told to kill. A rather “realistic” super-soldier.
I also liked Blair Witch, but not as a movie, more as an experiment of how to make movies. The fact that the director and crew were not on site but leaving little notes and the cameras were manned by the actors themselves made for an (singular, I am not a masochist) interesting viewing. Especially when they were panicking and the camera was spinning all around without cuts. It was refreshing, not scary, not creepy, kinda like a Long Island on a hot day.
My pick for bad would be the 10 minutes of Left Behind that I have seen. Followed by Dark Man.
“Whipped” is my Personal Worst of the Millenium…
…and I say this as one who is probably mere baby-steps removed from
an Amanda Peet-induced TRO.
-Richard
It’s probably not the worst movie ever, but if we’re putting together a list of bad theatrical-released films, I want to make sure Robot Jox doesn’t get overlooked.
I could tolerate the bad acting, the thin plot, and the one-dimensional characters, but the whole point of the movie – seeing big robots slug it out to the death – was also boring as hell. Total disappointment.
HO-leeee shit, I forgot all about Leonard Part the Sixth.
DAMN YOU
Fist of Fear, Touch of Death. Someone bought up a bunch of stock footage, slapped it together, and threw some narration on top. Absolutely dreadful. I love kung fu movies, the worse the better, and I don’t think I managed to finish this one. If I did, I’ve successfully repressed the memories.
I haven’t seen it in eons so imagine my surprise to find out Jennifer Connelly was in it.
I love this review though:
(especially for the Highlander II reference that seems so timely considering recent mentions here.)
The movie was just out and out bad.
THANK YOU! I was wondering why no one had mentioned this Bill Cosby fiasco. I’ve never seen a worse movie in my life (and I liked Cool World and Satisfaction…).
Well, that’s what happens when the lead dies before you can film his death scene.
I saw this as a kid, but I thought it was hilarious. The concept of Rabbits tearing of cities was too funny.
And it’s the only non star-trek movie I’ve ever seen Deforest Kelly in.
The movies I’m looking for need not be released to theaters.
They just need to be available on a video medium.
And yes there is a level way beyond theater releases.
I just discovered a new low: Showgirls - edited for VH-1.
It’s even worse with all the language and nudity edited out!
Since most of the really good terrible ones are taken, I’ll give these two that I saw on cable while in motels in my teens and still remember:
The Hills Have Eyes 2- a no budget sequel to Hills Have Eyes (which was a no budget that made money), horny teenagers try to cross through a track of desert occupied by an inbred family of cannibals. The movie is so bad that it features a flashback of pieced-together scenes from the first from the perspective of a DOG!
Humongous- horny kids on an island are picked off by a creature who had a really bad childhood. Tries to steal from Psycho and Friday 13, etc., but it’s petty theft. The strangest thing is: the title makes absolutely no sense whatever- the killer is a human, a bit deformed and monstrous maybe but not humongous. In the end only one horny kid is left alive- she kills the monster but is stuck on the island because she’s blind.
Like the “Holloween” series of crap movies. the first one wasOK, but the movies got progressively worse and worse. Of course, Donald Pleasance made a career out of “Halloween”, but the plots got sillier and sillier. Eventually, you get tired of watching beautiful, sexy teenagers get filleted and skewered. What was that other teen, mass-murder series (it was set at a summer camp, and everybody gets killed)/Of course, you get to see a lot of sexy girls stripping down (before the psychopath breaks in and kills them).
That would be Friday the 13th.
Damn… that was mine.
You forgot to mention the excellently cheesy Queen-esque theme song that played whenever Yor did something “total”…
YORRRRR, he’s the mannNNNNNN!!!
Since I have to to come up with another, I will submit the horrible (not even horribly good) ET ripoff, Mac and Me, which is actually just a 95 minute long ad for McDonalds and Coca-Cola.
Whoops, you actually did mention the soundtrack. <Emily Litella>Never mind.</Emily Litella</>
Big Bad Voodoo Lou
There was a best or worst fight scenes in movies thread recently and folks really railed on the scene from They Live. I gotta agree though that I think it’s one of the best ever.
And rabbits and cats make the worst actors. They just can’t focus!
How could we get this far without mentioning The Gong Show Movie?
Holy Jesus on a striped camel!!