I’m such a hypocrite.
Here I complain about finding a horse colon in the bathroom and then I remember I’d left such a beast myself many years back. I actually did mention this in another thread but it was a year or more back so don’t read on if this sounds familiar unless, of course, you like a good poop story.
I used to go to summer camp as a kid. We ran and played and stayed so active that you usually only had to squat once a week or so. No shit. But oh what a squat it would be.
My fateful day arrived one bright Saturday morning. I’d gone into the large communal crapper and sat down to do my business. What was strange was that I’d started to poop and it just wouldn’t stop. It just kept coming and coming to where it felt like I was flossing my butt with a garden hose. Finally my anus nipped the long awaited bud and I stood up to admire my handiwork.
What lay before me was truly remarkable.
You ever seen those Indian guys that kneel before a large bowl and charm a Cobra? Here was my enormous serpent, all coiled up like it was waiting to strike. It had started off going round and round in circles like those guys do with the rope on a ship’s deck, then had switched to accordian style. I think there was a knot in the middle. I gasped, jumped back and exclaimed * “Oh my gosh… I just took a shit that’s two feet long!” *
I heard paper rustle in the stall next to me and soon another camper rushed in and stood next to me in disbelief. * “Look at that… You just made a dookie that’s two feet long!”*
Several of the guys quit their showering, ran over and exclaimed in unison * “Holy cow, that turd’s gotta be two feet long!”*
One of the little campers looked scared, quickly rushed out the door and ran smack into one of the directors. * “Hey Jimmy, How ya doin’?” * he asked. * “Not so well Mr. Munson. There’s a boy that just took a shit in there that’s two feet long.”*
Concerned, Mr Munson came in, peered over my shoulder at the serpent and said to me gravely* “Son, that shit’s about two feet long.” *
Yeah Mr. Munson. No kidding.