Well, ** chiefgnome**, all I can say is :eek:
And please, feel free to vent! I welcome any horror stories that are comparable or worse than my own–it’s comforting in a strange kind of way 
I do think the porn DVD would work on Mr. and Mrs. Ass Monkey because they claim to be devout christians. However, it could encourage the already creepy Pugsley and I really don’t want to go there!
Jiminy, chiefgnome, I didn’t know you had people like that in England! Most of us Yanks picture all Brits as the cast of Brideshead Revisited, swanning around in tennis whites, sipping a gin fizz and saying, “jolly good!” and “what ho!”
It’s kind of reassuring to know that Cletus and Brandine live there, too.
And the winner of today’s best single line on SDMB:
Runner up…
What’s a nappy?
Bolding mine
That would be a diaper, Jaade.
It seems like justice would be served best if my neighbors were forced to live next to yours, chiefgnome–then again, they’d probably get along great.
Hmmm. I’m seeing a reality TV special here… kind of like The Real World, with a little of Changing Rooms mixed in. Sort of a Jukes and Kallikaks Christmas Special
Didn’t mean to shatter your illusions Eve! Is this better?
They spend all day yelling “What ho!”, “Anyone for tennis?”. Their incessant croquet wakes me up in morning and their discarded doilies litter the street.
They insist upon passing the port to the right and they have a vulgar butler. I suspect they may have bought their own furniture, and last week one of them wore white tie after six.
The father can only trace his family back twelve generations and I understand the vulgar arrivistes have even been known to drink red wine with fish.
Frankly the whole neighbourhoods going to the dogs
Theyyyyyy’rrrreeee baaaaaccckkkk… 
As I type this, Mr. Ass Monkey and his brother-in-law Bubba, are ripping apart the back bathroom. He forgot to empty the toilet before moving it so now I have toilet water all over my kitchen floor. He assures me this will look great when it’s all done. Of course, this is from the man who installed a vanity in my other bathroom but neglected to secure it to the wall or the floor and didn’t secure the sink to the vanity. Same guy who almost replaced an outlet without shutting the electricity off first. Yeah, I’m confident.
pity me.
move.
Is that legal where you are? I know you have to be 18 to play them; can they be privately owned? For that matter, where do you suppose they got it? I can just see them pulling up the bolts and dragging it out of the arcade…
Well, Mith, we’re trying to move. My SO is still unemployed so he won’t be able to get a mortgage–if I can (I’m in the process of applying), it might not be enough to cover something in a decent school district. Home prices around here are just crazy! I keep reading that the prices will be going down soon, but soon never seems to come.
Right now the bathroom is completely gutted and they’re coming back Wednesday night to start rebuilding. Apparently Bubba works for a reputable plumber in the area so this might not be as awful as every repair job that Ass Monkey has done solo. It is nice to be here at work, though, where it’s quiet and peaceful and I have a big, comfy chair and everyone is nice. Jeez, now I’m starting to scare myself!
Phew! Thank you, chiefgnome—now I can sleep happily with visions of Lady Marjorie dancing in my addled pate.
lauramarlane, you don’t have any mafioso friends who can throw a scare into them? I used to date thugs when I was a young moll, and they did come in handy for such things.
Eve, you don’t know how much I wish Tony Soprano were my dad!
Guess it’s time to start up that subscription to Soldier of Fortune magazine.
You just cleared up four years of East Enders for me.
Ava